Men, how do you find a wife who makes around the same as you?

[Anonymous]

Seems like every other poster here makes 200-300k and is married to someone else making a salary in this range. How do you guys find women like this? I make in this range as well but every girl I’ve dated earns below 50k. I’m not sure I want to enter a marriage with such a disparity in earnings, but I cannot for the life of me find a single woman who is at my level career wise. Am I dating too young? I mostly stick with women 25-30. I’m
32.

[Anonymous]

At work

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At work

+1 that's how we met.

Where is OP meeting these women? Tinder?

[Anonymous]

Find someone with a good work ethic in grad school or shortly thereafter and humility (i.e. doesn't expect life to be handed to them on a silver platter). The rest is luck.

[Anonymous]

1. Rich/High earner
2. Young/Attractive
3. Sane/Stable

Pick 2.

[Anonymous]

Elite grad schools. All the high earning dual-income couples I know met in grad school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. Rich/High earner
2. Young/Attractive
3. Sane/Stable

Pick 2.

You totally botched this old fashioned saying in trying to make it work for income purposes.

[Anonymous]

I would target a trust fund baby over high earner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would target a trust fund baby over high earner.

Hilarious. Good luck with that.

[Anonymous]

Almost everyone I know is in two career marriages with high incomes and they all met in grad school.

[Anonymous]

I made a lot less than him when we got married, but he supported me going to law school shortly thereafter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At work

+1 that's how we met.

Where is OP meeting these women? Tinder?

I am terrified of approaching women at work after the Me Too stuff. I don’t want to sabotage my career for trying to hit on the wrong woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I made a lot less than him when we got married, but he supported me going to law school shortly thereafter.

We met when he was 30 and I was 23 by the way.

[Anonymous]

Dh and I each make $150k. It was luck since we met on college. Dh is underpaid and I’m a big overpaid (I can hustle and I’m insanely good at my job).

I think making the same income is a bit of a burden. 150k is awesome but not enough for me to step back when we had infants. Also, most people who make more money have demanding jobs and you need someone to be home with the kids by 5:30. I personally think the lawyer/ teacher, doctor/ nurse combo is the best for raising kids and balancing income.

[Anonymous]

Just want to note that many worthwhile professions don’t pay much, such as scientific research. Young post docs (post PhDs) at NIH in cancer and other research are barely making 60K. My husband is a senior researcher and has never made more than $110K. Same for a lot of “public service” expertise.

Also, if you have children together, your wife might get mommy-tracked whether she wants to or not, with a corresponding drop in earnings.

A laser focus on dollar amounts seems to ignore important values such as: are these women smart and kind? Do they make you happy? Do you make them happy?