Pretty angry. Women I’m supposed to be going out with in 5 hours just texted me this.

[Anonymous]

She was honest, can’t get mad about honesty. You can be disappointed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She was honest, can’t get mad about honesty. You can be disappointed.

OP or anyone can be mad about anything they wish.

[Anonymous]

OP's anger outburst on social media is not appropriate.

The woman dodged a bullet. He needs a therapist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP's anger outburst on social media is not appropriate.

The woman dodged a bullet. He needs a therapist.

He hasn't made an angry outburst on social media. He posted on an anonymous forum rather coherently about his frustration over his dating situation.



I guess all the women who post here complaining about their relationships have anger problems and need therapy too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is a typical man and the only feeling he’s allowed himself to have (due to socialization) is rage. So he actually feels hurt or disappointed, but he has transformed this into anger because that’s an acceptable emotion for a man. I think he should get therapy, not because he’s a bad person, but because being able to identify and feel a range of emotions is healthy.

I think you need therapy.

You do understand that this isn’t the indictment you think it is, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: A text was rude, she should have called.

She's immature and flighty.

In the long run she has done you a favor. I know it sucks , it never feels good to be rejected, but at least it's only been a month. She could have kept stringing you along for 6 + months. Or worse you could be like someone else I know who got dumped at the altar for an ex.

Now you know. I hope you decided to go out anyway, and I hope you met someone great. This happened to a friend of mine who was blown off by a date, went out that night anyway, and met their spouse.

Sometimes even things that hurt are a blessing in disguise. You are now free to find your person.

IF you didn't go ou tonight that's okay too. Be hurt for tonight and maybe tomorrow, but get back out there and have a date planned for next weekend.

Good luck to you1

A text is not rude. We have no idea if they’ve even spoken on the phone. If that’s their primary way of communicating then a text is perfectly fine, especially if they’ve only had one date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is a typical man and the only feeling he’s allowed himself to have (due to socialization) is rage. So he actually feels hurt or disappointed, but he has transformed this into anger because that’s an acceptable emotion for a man. I think he should get therapy, not because he’s a bad person, but because being able to identify and feel a range of emotions is healthy.

I think you need therapy.

You do understand that this isn’t the indictment you think it is, right?

I don't think it's an indictment. I think you need therapy because it's actually beneficial for people like you who have an extreme hatred of one gender.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: A text was rude, she should have called.

She's immature and flighty.

In the long run she has done you a favor. I know it sucks , it never feels good to be rejected, but at least it's only been a month. She could have kept stringing you along for 6 + months. Or worse you could be like someone else I know who got dumped at the altar for an ex.

Now you know. I hope you decided to go out anyway, and I hope you met someone great. This happened to a friend of mine who was blown off by a date, went out that night anyway, and met their spouse.

Sometimes even things that hurt are a blessing in disguise. You are now free to find your person.

IF you didn't go ou tonight that's okay too. Be hurt for tonight and maybe tomorrow, but get back out there and have a date planned for next weekend.

Good luck to you1

A text is not rude. We have no idea if they’ve even spoken on the phone. If that’s their primary way of communicating then a text is perfectly fine, especially if they’ve only had one date.

A text is rude. Better than ghosting, but still rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is a typical man and the only feeling he’s allowed himself to have (due to socialization) is rage. So he actually feels hurt or disappointed, but he has transformed this into anger because that’s an acceptable emotion for a man. I think he should get therapy, not because he’s a bad person, but because being able to identify and feel a range of emotions is healthy.

Thank you - I’m hurt and disappointed, not angry. When I feel this way I just label it as anger or being pissed off. I’m upset and confused at the situation not her per se, though if she knew she was still emotionally wrapped up in someone else it would’ve been nice to know before today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: A text was rude, she should have called.

She's immature and flighty.

In the long run she has done you a favor. I know it sucks , it never feels good to be rejected, but at least it's only been a month. She could have kept stringing you along for 6 + months. Or worse you could be like someone else I know who got dumped at the altar for an ex.

Now you know. I hope you decided to go out anyway, and I hope you met someone great. This happened to a friend of mine who was blown off by a date, went out that night anyway, and met their spouse.

Sometimes even things that hurt are a blessing in disguise. You are now free to find your person.

IF you didn't go ou tonight that's okay too. Be hurt for tonight and maybe tomorrow, but get back out there and have a date planned for next weekend.

Good luck to you1

A text is not rude. We have no idea if they’ve even spoken on the phone. If that’s their primary way of communicating then a text is perfectly fine, especially if they’ve only had one date.

A text is rude. Better than ghosting, but still rude.

A text is not rude for one date where they only communicated via text. They weren’t exclusive, they hadn’t gone on multiple dates, and it seems like they weren’t in regular communication. A text is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: A text was rude, she should have called.

She's immature and flighty.

In the long run she has done you a favor. I know it sucks , it never feels good to be rejected, but at least it's only been a month. She could have kept stringing you along for 6 + months. Or worse you could be like someone else I know who got dumped at the altar for an ex.

Now you know. I hope you decided to go out anyway, and I hope you met someone great. This happened to a friend of mine who was blown off by a date, went out that night anyway, and met their spouse.

Sometimes even things that hurt are a blessing in disguise. You are now free to find your person.

IF you didn't go ou tonight that's okay too. Be hurt for tonight and maybe tomorrow, but get back out there and have a date planned for next weekend.

Good luck to you1

A text is not rude. We have no idea if they’ve even spoken on the phone. If that’s their primary way of communicating then a text is perfectly fine, especially if they’ve only had one date.

A text is rude. Better than ghosting, but still rude.

A text is not rude for one date where they only communicated via text. They weren’t exclusive, they hadn’t gone on multiple dates, and it seems like they weren’t in regular communication. A text is fine.

You can keep quoting me all you want. You are not going to change my opinion on the matter, a text is rude. especially since she had already agreed to the date and it was less then 24 hrs that she cancelled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is a typical man and the only feeling he’s allowed himself to have (due to socialization) is rage. So he actually feels hurt or disappointed, but he has transformed this into anger because that’s an acceptable emotion for a man. I think he should get therapy, not because he’s a bad person, but because being able to identify and feel a range of emotions is healthy.

Thank you - I’m hurt and disappointed, not angry. When I feel this way I just label it as anger or being pissed off. I’m upset and confused at the situation not her per se, though if she knew she was still emotionally wrapped up in someone else it would’ve been nice to know before today.

OP, what's better or easier about calling it "anger" or "pissed off," if it's not really anger, but really "hurt and disappointed?" Why label it as something it is not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, what would you have preferred?

She gave you fairly substantial notice (5hrs- its not like you were already on your way there) and was upfront about wanting to cancel.

Would you rather have gone on a date with someone who didn’t want to be there. If she just came to the realization that day that she wasn’t ready to date, what could she have done differently?

I also agree with everyone else who thinks anger is a concerning emotion to be feeling in this context.

The problem isn't how she said it. It's that he feels she rejected him. She said "no," and there is no right way to do that -- not to him.

So, anger. And guess who is going to get to experience that anger? Yeah. He's not going to deal with his own emotions on his own.

So now you have gone to just making up a complete lie that tOP is somehow going to attack or harass this woman? YOu are disgusting! Honestly, Jeff needs to get a handle on posters like you. You are bad as the men who post nasty comments about women.

- a women sick of the man hating commentary on DCUM.

How many women are you? Or are you just OP, who can't spell the singular "woman" correctly either?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is a typical man and the only feeling he’s allowed himself to have (due to socialization) is rage. So he actually feels hurt or disappointed, but he has transformed this into anger because that’s an acceptable emotion for a man. I think he should get therapy, not because he’s a bad person, but because being able to identify and feel a range of emotions is healthy.

Thank you - I’m hurt and disappointed, not angry. When I feel this way I just label it as anger or being pissed off. I’m upset and confused at the situation not her per se, though if she knew she was still emotionally wrapped up in someone else it would’ve been nice to know before today.

NP here. but it would be fine if you felt angry too. There's such a weird stigma around anger that I think it Has the opposite effect that people want. It's totally fine to be angry about something so long as you don't harm yourself or others when feeling so. Anger is just another emotion it is neither good or bad it just is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is quite literally not wasting your time by being honest and canceling your date. Your frame of thinking for this is entirely wrong.

+1 this is being respectful

+1