Au Pair just asked for more money

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have one family in our circle that uses an au pair and it’s so gross. Say whatever you want to justify it, but it’s sourcing a poor brown girl to come live in your house and parent your children, probably put up with your DH’s creep show.

Our neighbors who do this are the laziest, worst parents in the neighborhood. The au pair took their kids trick or treating!

And yes, I’m sure it’s a million times worse now that these girls are effectively locked in the house, can’t socialize with their home country peers, and on top of it all get to now manage home schooling for your kids. Which you WFH moms just LOVE to tell us relentlessly is a full time job. But sure, $200 a week (much of which gets paid back to the agency) should cover it.

Many AP's are also white.

[Anonymous]

The posters saying the market has shifted are absolutely correct. It was about the time too. This was an exploitative situation. Let’s hope the shift stays. NYT:
Many in-country au pairs are now telling interested hosts that they are only willing to match in exchange for certain assurances, such as a personal car or payment upward of $400 a week. The minimum stipend for au pairs is $195.75 a week for a maximum of 45 hours of work, which is set by the State Department. (nytimes.com/2020/07/25/business/the-great-au-pair-rush.html)
Being isolated with any family is a hardship post right now. Au pairs used to have a great social life and kids used to go to school. So pay up or risk losing her/him. I’m always shocked how cheap most women in DC are towards their household employees, and often don’t provide vacation days and weeks. Yet, consider themselves modern and liberal. Gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$200 a week is all people pay full time au pairs?

Plus room, board, a phone and often a car.

How much did you have left over at the end of the month when all these were paid for when you were 20?

It’s basically indentured servitude. In the past, it was somewhat justified as a cultural exchange (although never really was), but that’s completely impossible during COVID. So I bet this au pair is doing more work than ever. No wonder she wants (and deserves) a raise! Yet this cheap-o think she’s generous because she’s exceeding the program minimum by $5?! I hope she walks and leaves your a$$. A better family will pick her up in a second. Disgusting people.

Have you had an au pair? If you are a good family these girls have it great. The work they do isn't all that hard, in many cases just dropping off and picking up kids. They spend lots of their weekends with other girls they meet from their home countries. It's a balance when done right, and $195.75 or so a week is plenty for them.

Typical attempt to justify, but it doesn’t work. You are exploiting women from other countries and paying them less than minimum wage to care for your children. It’s even worse during a pandemic. In any other context this would be illegal, if not for this weird loophole that so clearly should be closed. You are cheap, terrible people. All your friends and family think it, trust me.

Exploiting women from other countries? Haha. All the au pairs I’ve come into contact with are 18 year olds from affluent German families looking for a year of fun and adventure.

If it’s “exploitative,” then the exploiting is happening on both ends! There is mutual benefit to the families and the au pairs. That’s what makes the program so popular & rewarding.

You think being stuck with you in the burbs or kinda burbs parts of DC is fun, adventure and cultured?! Ha! If I were a scarce au pair I’d either hoof it back to my my more fun adventure cultured affluent German family or go live with a CA or HI family in their pool house. You’re seriously deluded about how interesting you are in DC with your hard bargain driving at $200. Do you read the papers?!

[Anonymous]

I pay my cleaner $200 per week for a for few hours of work plus required benefits plus bonuses etc. Is this a joke? What decade do you people live in?

[Anonymous]

How are they supposed to save any money making 200 bucks a week? What in the world?

[Anonymous]

Let us know when the au pair decides to leave. I know a bunch of families like ours that would love to have her, would treat her with the respect she deserves (always, but particularly for being willing to be here now), would appreciate the help she’s willing to offer. and are not massive cheapskates or pop psychologists with their role play for how to talk to her to avoid forking over a few extra dollars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How are they supposed to save any money making 200 bucks a week? What in the world?

They have no expenses. The host family pays everything except for add on entertainment and travel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are they supposed to save any money making 200 bucks a week? What in the world?

They have no expenses. The host family pays everything except for add on entertainment and travel.

And your point is? How do they save? They cannot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are they supposed to save any money making 200 bucks a week? What in the world?

They have no expenses. The host family pays everything except for add on entertainment and travel.

You are still massively deluded. Market has spoken: $400+ a week, car, only the duties in the program (no pressure to clean and do extra stuff) and a car. Read the NYT article. Then read it again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are they supposed to save any money making 200 bucks a week? What in the world?

They have no expenses. The host family pays everything except for add on entertainment and travel.

Sounds like slavery plus 28 bucks a day.

[Anonymous]

NYT: great au pair rush (get it? like gold rush?)
Many in-country au pairs are now telling interested hosts that they are only willing to match in exchange for certain assurances, such as a personal car or payment upward of $400 a week. The minimum stipend for au pairs is $195.75 a week for a maximum of 45 hours of work, which is set by the State Department. (nytimes.com/2020/07/25/business/the-great-au-pair-rush.html)

[Anonymous]

Rise up! About time. Meanwhile, half of these Moms don’t work and would be completely uncompetitive in the workplace.

[Anonymous]

Don’t think I’ve seen less culture most places than in your au paired DMV families. What culture are you exchanging with these poor girls/boys? Head for California and Hawaii ladies/gentlemen! At least you’ll experience something special.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are they supposed to save any money making 200 bucks a week? What in the world?

They have no expenses. The host family pays everything except for add on entertainment and travel.

And your point is? How do they save? They cannot.

They save in a bank account, like everyone else.

Our au saved up and used her money on travel like mad. 10 days in Hawaii, 10 days in Cancun, a travel month visiting the Geand Canyon, Aches, Death Valley, SF, Yosemite. A week in Florida at Disney and Universal. Trips to Seattle, Boston, Philadelphia, and on and on. The au pairs split rental cars and hotel rooms with groups to save money--like most teenagers would. Then she went home and got her dream job at a multinational company leveraging her English skills.

Obviously travel is now curtailed. But our out of country au pair would rather be here saving $200 a week than at home unemployed and living in a 2 bedroom apartment with her parents and sibling under a stay at home order. She is from Milan and already spent months holed up in tiny quarters with no ability to even go outside during the first Italian wave. Covid affects her ability to socialize in both countries.

[Anonymous]

NYT: while au pairs entering the program might speak with only two or three families in the initial interview process, in-country candidates are now hearing from 10, 20, sometimes closer to 50 prospective families

Host families have taken note of the new dynamic, too: Perusing some Facebook groups in mid-June, I found posts announcing benefits like unlimited public transportation passes, new cars, access to beach houses and skydiving trips, and double the pay. “We’re offering a 2000 USD sign-on bonus,” one parent wrote.

Coming from difficult working conditions with her first host family — including verbal abuse, additional chores like housecleaning and dog-grooming, and long hours for no extra pay — the Colombian au pair’s top priority was finding a family that would be the best fit.