Single mom by choice-Am I crazy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a cousin who did what you are thinking of doing and her kid ended up in foster care because I am childfree and have no interest in raising any children. So you need to think carefully if something does happen.

That's really crummy you wouldn't take the kids.

Hopefully the kids went to a loving home.

But yeah she does seem like a selfish person

How many kids did you adopt?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me start by saying I’ve been divorced for 8 years. I have a 15 year old and I really want another child. My dating life is nonexistent so I’ve been considering having a baby on my own. I know it’s better to get married first, but I’ve been there, done that. Plus if I wait until I meet the right one, it may be too late. I’m almost 42 so I would like to have a baby with the next year or two. Am I crazy for considering this?

Are you crazy? I don't know but it is irresponsible to and stupid to have a child without a committed partner. Also, 42 is too old nomatter what anyone says.

Says who? I have two grandmothers who had kids in their 40s.

Says the child-woman who had a baby at 17 and is now a 33 year old grandmother herself.

Lol! Applause... YES

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a cousin who did what you are thinking of doing and her kid ended up in foster care because I am childfree and have no interest in raising any children. So you need to think carefully if something does happen.

That's really crummy you wouldn't take the kids.

+1
Awful person

I’m a crummy person because I don’t want to be saddled with 2 kids under 5 who were going to be foisted on me just because of shared DNA? What about their deadbeat dads? I wasn’t responsible for their existence. I’m the daughter of a single deadbeat mom myself and I just don’t have rose tinted glasses on. I dealt with my own s*** and never gave anyone else issues. As I told my cousin, it’s easy to make children but not easy to care for them. I know that first hand but she was dumb and got involved with no-Gooder types and went downhill from there. Not my circus, not my monkeys.

Except children aren’t circus animals, lady. I think you sound rotten.

[Anonymous]

Who the hell has a baby with no contingency plan in her legal documents/life insurance? ? No way in hell would I take some cousin's baby!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a cousin who did what you are thinking of doing and her kid ended up in foster care because I am childfree and have no interest in raising any children. So you need to think carefully if something does happen.

That's really crummy you wouldn't take the kids.

+1
Awful person

I’m a crummy person because I don’t want to be saddled with 2 kids under 5 who were going to be foisted on me just because of shared DNA? What about their deadbeat dads? I wasn’t responsible for their existence. I’m the daughter of a single deadbeat mom myself and I just don’t have rose tinted glasses on. I dealt with my own s*** and never gave anyone else issues. As I told my cousin, it’s easy to make children but not easy to care for them. I know that first hand but she was dumb and got involved with no-Gooder types and went downhill from there. Not my circus, not my monkeys.

Except children aren’t circus animals, lady. I think you sound rotten.

I didn’t ask to be related to anyone. Why don’t you adopt unwanted children then since you’re so benevolent?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who the hell has a baby with no contingency plan in her legal documents/life insurance? ? No way in hell would I take some cousin's baby!

I also think that if the PP were a guy, the comments wouldn’t be so harsh. Like it would be understandable if a guy didn’t want to take his cousins kids, but given that PP is a woman, she’s condemned and vilified and called everything from crummy to selfish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a cousin who did what you are thinking of doing and her kid ended up in foster care because I am childfree and have no interest in raising any children. So you need to think carefully if something does happen.

That's really crummy you wouldn't take the kids.

Hopefully the kids went to a loving home.

But yeah she does seem like a selfish person

How many kids did you adopt?

2

[Anonymous]

So if she was married and stable you would have taken them. But since she wasn't you won't?

Way to punish kids for the sins of the parents, but they're probably better off without you anyway

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a cousin who did what you are thinking of doing and her kid ended up in foster care because I am childfree and have no interest in raising any children. So you need to think carefully if something does happen.

That's really crummy you wouldn't take the kids.

Hopefully the kids went to a loving home.

But yeah she does seem like a selfish person

How many kids did you adopt?

2

Oh good, that means you're in the perfect position to realize that children should be wanted. You're also in the position to realize you wouldn't have those 2 kids if they were placed with family that didn't want them. Fingers crossed you aren't telling your kids that you have them because their biological family was "crummy".

[Anonymous]

Adopting a baby by choice is different than abandoning family to foster homes.

Yes. If you are able to take them in it is definitely crummy to abandon to foster care.

I'd think my brother was a jerk if he did that. Our neighbor growing up was a childless, living alone man. His sister a single mom died and left him with 3 little girls. He raised them beautifully. Even fought for the last one in court when her addict dad tried to take her.

Just because his sister made poor decisions. Doesnt mean the kids should be abandoned to strangers. At least with you dl you'd know they weren't getting molested and abused as happens in foster care.

[Anonymous]

NP here.

I haven't seen my cousins since we were about 12. I've certainly never met their children.

Should I also pay my cousin's rent/school loans, etc because they are somehow related to me?

What is specified in the cousin's life insurance and will? How much did she leave for the family member(s) to raise her child(ren)?

[Anonymous]

It's not about money. You can get money from child welfare services that should cover food and basics. Plenty of parents don't pay for private school or college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP here.

I haven't seen my cousins since we were about 12. I've certainly never met their children.

Should I also pay my cousin's rent/school loans, etc because they are somehow related to me?

What is specified in the cousin's life insurance and will? How much did she leave for the family member(s) to raise her child(ren)?

What on earth? This has nothing to do with the topic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a cousin who did what you are thinking of doing and her kid ended up in foster care because I am childfree and have no interest in raising any children. So you need to think carefully if something does happen.

That's really crummy you wouldn't take the kids.

Hopefully the kids went to a loving home.

But yeah she does seem like a selfish person

How many kids did you adopt?

I adopted one, planned to adopt the sibling but that didn't work out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP here.

I haven't seen my cousins since we were about 12. I've certainly never met their children.

Should I also pay my cousin's rent/school loans, etc because they are somehow related to me?

What is specified in the cousin's life insurance and will? How much did she leave for the family member(s) to raise her child(ren)?

What on earth? This has nothing to do with the topic.

I guess you haven't read though the entire thread.