Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again I say, 100 years ago it was probably normal for a girl to be married with at least 1 child by age 13 or 14.

No, it never was. Only among the elites was it something that was done for inheritance and alliance reasons. Rare among normal folks.

The average age of puberty used to be older than it is now. It more usual for girls to start their period at age 15 or 16.

[Anonymous]

I was 18 when I had my first and 19 when I had my second. I married their dad a few years later and we now have a total of 4 kids. All were born by the time I was 30.

When I was younger I would have told you hell no about having them so young. It was darn hard, but now that I am 40 and my youngest is almost 16 I am glad I had them young.

Still wouldn't recommend it though. It just so happened to work out for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again I say, 100 years ago it was probably normal for a girl to be married with at least 1 child by age 13 or 14.

No, it never was. Only among the elites was it something that was done for inheritance and alliance reasons. Rare among normal folks.

The average age of puberty used to be older than it is now. It more usual for girls to start their period at age 15 or 16.

100 years ago is 1918. In 1920, the median age of first marriage for women was 21.2 and for men was 24.6. (Median means that half were older than the median age and half were younger.) In 1890, it was even older: 22.0 and 26.1.

https://www.census.gov/population/socdemo/hh-fam/tabMS-2.pdf

The year of youngest median age of first marriage is 1955: 20.2 for women and 22.6 for men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again I say, 100 years ago it was probably normal for a girl to be married with at least 1 child by age 13 or 14.

No, it never was. Only among the elites was it something that was done for inheritance and alliance reasons. Rare among normal folks.

Wrong. Working class people needed free labor for their farm or business and knew that at least half their children would die in childbirth or as infants so they popped them out early and often.

In the 1800s and early 1900s, in the US and Europe, the typical woman had her first child in her early 20s. She would bear children, one after another, until around 40. After the industrial revolution had really taken hold, when so many children weren't needed, she stopped have children in her early-mid 30s. It was like this until around the 1970s.

In the Middle Ages, it's more mixed than you'd think. People recognized that the best time to have babies is in the early 20s and wouldn't necessarily want to give up a teenage girl's labor. Sure, preganncy could be in the teens but also very likely for the first pregnancy to be when the woman is in her early 20s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This was not at all unusual where I grew up (small town, Midwest, corn fields, nothing much to do). There were always several really pregnant girls walking around my high school. They weren't shunned or anything. The high school faced reality and added a baby care class for the girls and boys who were soon to be parents. The babies could be brought in for that period and the soon to be parents could practice diaper changes and such.

I'm sure some of the girls opted for homeschool but that certainly wasn't because they weren't accepted. As far as I know, those pregnant classmates are generally doing fine now, 20 years later.

this is why we need to bring back shame. There is no reason for a teenager to get pregnant these days.

SHAME?

When did shame become a form a birth control?

I'm Asian and honestly think some non-Asian Americans could use some shame. Stigma can be purposeful for keeping young people on the straight and narrow. There's a reason why Asians don't have many of the social problems that plague other races.

You must have never been to Thailand before.

Well, those women you're thinking about are stigmatized and that's why local Thai men won't marry them. Generally, Asians look down on babies born out of wedlock and their mothers. I should know because I was born out of wedlock myself in Asia (not going to say which country). I spent my childhood and teenhood lying that my father died before I was born because I was taught early on how shameful it was.

[Anonymous]

I had my son when I was 17. Married his father at 18. We had another child when I was 20 and 22. Done having all my kids by the time I was 22. We’re still married and I’m a CPA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teen mothers happen with lack of readily available birth control (without parental consent), Plan B, and abortions.

Teens have sex. End of story.

Have you ever watched an episode of 16 & Pregnant or Teen Mom? All of them are well aware of birth control, etc. They each have their own reason for intentionally getting pregnant (i.e. they are dating the hot guy in school and want to attach themselves to him, they want to shock their friends or parents, etc.).

In today's society, there is no shame in getting pregnant so early.(You can do it! We'll support you!)

[Anonymous]

My cousin had a baby at 17. It was a very odd situation as she was only like a part time mom. My aunt and uncle hired a nanny for the baby so she could continue HS.

She applied for college and got accepted just like they’d planned all along. Then when that fall came, the baby stayed with her parents and she went off to school. She didn’t keep it a secret that she had a kid, but she only saw her kid during school breaks for 4 years! Once she graduated, she moved home and went to grad school at Georgetown. Once she graduated from grad school and got her first job, she and the kid moved out and that’s when she became a full time mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teen mothers happen with lack of readily available birth control (without parental consent), Plan B, and abortions.

Teens have sex. End of story.

Have you ever watched an episode of 16 & Pregnant or Teen Mom? All of them are well aware of birth control, etc. They each have their own reason for intentionally getting pregnant (i.e. they are dating the hot guy in school and want to attach themselves to him, they want to shock their friends or parents, etc.).

In today's society, there is no shame in getting pregnant so early.(You can do it! We'll support you!)

They are the outliers. Teen pregnancy is way down. Yay birth control. Yay abortion

[Anonymous]

I dated a guy who was 2 years younger than me, and his mom had him when she was 14. So she was 12 years older than me. My older SISTER is 12 years older than me. It was truly bizarre that his mom and my sister were the same age!

His mom had a graduate degree and a very successful career. Obviously his grandparents helped her a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My cousin had a baby at 17. It was a very odd situation as she was only like a part time mom. My aunt and uncle hired a nanny for the baby so she could continue HS.

She applied for college and got accepted just like they’d planned all along. Then when that fall came, the baby stayed with her parents and she went off to school. She didn’t keep it a secret that she had a kid, but she only saw her kid during school breaks for 4 years! Once she graduated, she moved home and went to grad school at Georgetown. Once she graduated from grad school and got her first job, she and the kid moved out and that’s when she became a full time mom.

That's wonderful that her parents were so supportive and helped her so much! I'm sure she missed her child a lot while she was in school, but it sounds like she did the right thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had my son when I was 17. Married his father at 18. We had another child when I was 20 and 22. Done having all my kids by the time I was 22. We’re still married and I’m a CPA.

That's awesome!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This was not at all unusual where I grew up (small town, Midwest, corn fields, nothing much to do). There were always several really pregnant girls walking around my high school. They weren't shunned or anything. The high school faced reality and added a baby care class for the girls and boys who were soon to be parents. The babies could be brought in for that period and the soon to be parents could practice diaper changes and such.

I'm sure some of the girls opted for homeschool but that certainly wasn't because they weren't accepted. As far as I know, those pregnant classmates are generally doing fine now, 20 years later.

this is why we need to bring back shame. There is no reason for a teenager to get pregnant these days.

Shame is the reason Asia has a high suicide rate.

[Anonymous]

I know a 38 year old grandmother.

[Anonymous]

One of my friends had her daughter at 16. Had a lot of parental help. Remarried at 30 ish and had a second daughter.