How to deal with “UVA mom” after rude remark?

[Anonymous]

It's pretty natural to bring up schools kids applied to and schools you're awaiting when talking about where kids are committing. I don't think it's big-shotting anyone, unless you're especially insecure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:



I had to double-check the date of OP's post because I remember one exactly like it a year ago.

Yep. She is still steamed about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's pretty natural to bring up schools kids applied to and schools you're awaiting when talking about where kids are committing. I don't think it's big-shotting anyone, unless you're especially insecure.

People that I’m not close personal friends with, I don’t expect them to tell me that their kid didn’t get into whatever school or is waiting to hear from specific schools. Even with my close friends, I wouldn’t expect it either but I could see them saying something because they are seeking advice or reassurance. It is not so much insecurity but about being vulnerable with someone that may not be your friend and sharing information that really isn’t your story to tell but is your child’s story. I started to think about what information does your child want you to share about them with other parents when I was at an event formedical research fundraising. One of the moms I know mentioned how she was sensitive about sharing her teenage daughter’s story related to the event and that it was really about if her daughter felt comfortable with her sharing it or was willing to share it herself.

So from the etiquette standpoint and privacy for your kids, less is really more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's pretty natural to bring up schools kids applied to and schools you're awaiting when talking about where kids are committing. I don't think it's big-shotting anyone, unless you're especially insecure.

It's not good etiquette to tell an excited parent that her child's achievement is (in as many words) your child's safety school

I will try to remember the advice in this thread if I'm ever in the same situation as OP so I don't come off as rude as she did

[Anonymous]

That being said, if the other person asks if my kid got into the same school, then I'd probably have to say yes and it's a great option but we aren't sure if he or she is going there

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
What about student to teacher ratio? Aren't many first and second year courses 300 to 500+ seat lectures?

Find them: https://rabi.phys.virginia.edu/mySIS/CS2/page.php?Semester=1182

The only classes over 300 I found are intros in bio, chem, psych, and econ. I found more classes in the teens than anything.

I love how you casually dismiss intro courses, i.e. weed out courses. Sorry you bombed your first chem and bio courses, pre-med Suzy, maybe you can become an accountant instead?

I don't think they were dismissing those intros. They were saying they didn't find a lot of massive courses.

From experience, I know that UVA only has 3 big lecture halls that seat over 300 - Chem auditorium, Wilson, and Gilmer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
What about student to teacher ratio? Aren't many first and second year courses 300 to 500+ seat lectures?

Find them: https://rabi.phys.virginia.edu/mySIS/CS2/page.php?Semester=1182

The only classes over 300 I found are intros in bio, chem, psych, and econ. I found more classes in the teens than anything.

I love how you casually dismiss intro courses, i.e. weed out courses. Sorry you bombed your first chem and bio courses, pre-med Suzy, maybe you can become an accountant instead?

I don't think they were dismissing those intros. They were saying they didn't find a lot of massive courses.

From experience, I know that UVA only has 3 big lecture halls that seat over 300 - Chem auditorium, Wilson, and Gilmer.

Intro to Chem, Intro to Bio aren't weed out classes in the strict sense of term. Gen Chem and Principals of Bio would be considered weed out, right?

[Anonymous]

Back in the 80's I took Intro to Psych and Bio in a huge lecture hall at VT. They weren't too terrible from what I recall.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like this is about money. People get very sensitive about these things. Let it go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Amazing but true: When someone tells you where their child is going, you can just talk about their child -- how excited s/he must be, what s/he wants to major in, how happy the parents must be. You can just shut up about your kid! You can!

The "UVA mom" asked! Was OP supposed to lie to the woman and say her daughter has committed to UVA [too] even though she hasn't?

I say that I'm leaving up to my son to make the announcement about his final decision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like this is about money. People get very sensitive about these things. Let it go.

I agree. Excited mom is relieved she doesn't have to pay a delta of $45k a year in after-tax money for four years. Give her some slack. A lot of us can't affordwhat it takes to send kids to private colleges anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Easy answer. UVA is ranked horribly low in all world university rankings. It's very weak in all the difficult subjects. That's why it has zero Nobel alumni and suprisingly few Pulitzers and Emmys. It also has no academy award alumni and no truly impactful alumni in the last 100 years. It's a safe school for safe people that fantasize for the old southern plantation. The world doesn't get the plantation fantasy.

OMG, "world university rankings" poster please go away.

AKA UMD booster.

Op, there’s really nothing to do or say. Sounds like she is just excited her DD was accepted at UVA, which is a great deal if you are in state. Hope your DD will be okay with it in the event she chooses to go there. Sounds like you think it would be settling, so be careful what you say to her.

I went to Maryland (not the quoted poster) and yeah, those are all metrics Maryland would beat UVA in. In fact, even UMBC is better than UVA in some metrics.

[Anonymous]

THIS is the rude Mark that upset you?

You deal with it by smiling and repeating your congrats to her daughter.

It wasn't about you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, this UVA mom is just thrilled that her kid will be able to receive the honor of honors—a UVA degree. Her kid won a tooth and nails competition for one of a place in one of the most sought after schools in the country. Let her savor the moment and cut her some slack.

Ha ha ha ha. Only in NOVA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Easy answer. UVA is ranked horribly low in all world university rankings. It's very weak in all the difficult subjects. That's why it has zero Nobel alumni and suprisingly few Pulitzers and Emmys. It also has no academy award alumni and no truly impactful alumni in the last 100 years. It's a safe school for safe people that fantasize for the old southern plantation. The world doesn't get the plantation fantasy.

OMG, "world university rankings" poster please go away.

AKA UMD booster.

Op, there’s really nothing to do or say. Sounds like she is just excited her DD was accepted at UVA, which is a great deal if you are in state. Hope your DD will be okay with it in the event she chooses to go there. Sounds like you think it would be settling, so be careful what you say to her.

I went to Maryland (not the quoted poster) and yeah, those are all metrics Maryland would beat UVA in. In fact, even UMBC is better than UVA in some metrics.

Troll resurrecting tired old thread.