While on travel, I met someone; nothing happened, .but I can not stop comparing her to my wife

[Anonymous]

That would support the crazy thesis. :p either way, not good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was married, I had an opportunity to cheat, too, and I didn't (woman here). But I did love the feeling of being wanted, because I didn't feel like that at home. At all. While I didn't chwat, it certainly opened my eyes to what was missing in my marriage so I gave it some time at home and tried to make it work but things only got worse. Less affection, he didn't even want to try to change. So I left. (No kids.) It was the best decision of my life. So while I would never advocate for leaving one person for another--there's just so much to risk and you can't count on that other person--I DO advocate for making an honest assessment of your marriage, getting counseling if necessary, and if you're still very unhappy, leave because you're unhappy. Never leave because of another person.

Times millions - they are NEVER what they seemed. Ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She was likely there for the sole purpose of finding a man...just sayin

+1

Married man. Cat in heat. No thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Block her! Do ypu know how to block someone?

Do you have kids? Granted I'm a bit paranoid but I would be worried someone like that would figure out where my kids went to school and start stalking them.

No way does a mentally healthy woman in her 40s look up someone who is married on FB. Crazy, thirsty, stalker.

eh, she didn't just "look up" the Op. She propositioned him, he said "no thanks" and then she proceeded to find him on Facebook and message him.

Looking someone up on Facebook is not crazy. It's the not taking "no" for an answer part that steps over the line. Disengage.

+1

No boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I messaged her, telling her, this is not who I am. End of story.

Ugh. Don't message her again. "This is not who I am" makes you sound guilty as sin - like something more happened than really did happen. Just stop talking to her.

+1

Drop it. And by "it" I mean her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What industry do you work in? Was the woman a foreign national -- North Korean perhaps? It sounds like you were targeted.

I'm one of the PPs who also thought this was quite suspicious. Yes people meet people but this scenario of running into you twice in a place different than where you lie, while also coincidentally living in your place of residence is very odd indeed. Either there's something going on or you should buy a lottery ticket OP.

Or she's a die hard Nats groupie that follows the team around and was looking for Op at the next game. Maybe this is her "thing".

OP here. I think this is the case. She was wearing Nats gear. Our conversations focused on the Nats. Like me, she was down for spring training. I mentioned my wife is not a big baseball fan....but I am.

I did tell her I was going to the next game, then heading home, so she could have decided then. It does not matter. I do not expect to see her again; I know which section her season tickets are in, and will avoid that section.

[Anonymous]

ZachF wrote:Meh - some of you married people must not get out much. There is nothing unusual about her actions. She saw what she wanted and went for it. There are a LOT of single women who have no problem hooking up with a married man.

She contacted him the only way she knew how. Facebook is anyone's first choice for looking someone up. He didn't discourage her and her being aggressive does not make her crazy.

Uh no. I did have a crush on a guy who was taken once and I threw myself at him at a party. I was 16. After that I learned my lesson and only went for guys who were also SINGLE.

People who are mature, healthy adults don't pursue other people's spouses. I'm sure a lot of people do hook up like you describe, but they aren't doing themselves any good and will end up with even less self esteem than they started out with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

Agree with others to try to improve your marriage. My husband is a huge baseball fan and I'm not but it was great to have a short getaway with the kids at their grandparents house. We watched several baseball games, went to tourist places, and yes had sex, and remembered what it was like to date and not have all of our day to day responsibilities. If you watch Modern Family I think there was an episode where Claire and Phil role play at a swanky hotel where they try to pick the other up at the bar on their anniversary.

OMG, that episode reminds me of when my DH and I (before children) and another couple thought that it would be a real hoot for the four of us to go to a Poconos honeymoon place and pretend that we were all newlyweds who ended up swapping on the honeymoon. We certainly didn't swap but our role playing was great and I'm sure we left many other honeymooners with a great story. My DH and shared a ton of laughs and enjoyed the heart shaped bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Baseball chick is a pile of problems. "I will not be ignored, DAN!" Seriously, if you haven't seen Fatal Attraction recently, go watch it again. An emotionally healthy woman doesn't chase a random married man. There are plenty of single guys in Florida.

Take this as a sign to work on your marriage. Institute a regular date night, go to counseling, try a marriage retreat, do something to put your focus there and bring back some spark.

Block this lady on Facebook. There's something wrong with her - this won't end well.

This this this. Please op, for your kids' sake I beg you:READ THIS POST until committed to memory! Do NOT go forward with this!!

[Anonymous]

ZachF wrote:Meh - some of you married people must not get out much. There is nothing unusual about her actions. She saw what she wanted and went for it. There are a LOT of single women who have no problem hooking up with a married man.

She contacted him the only way she knew how. Facebook is anyone's first choice for looking someone up. He didn't discourage her and her being aggressive does not make her crazy.

He didn't even give her his last name. She found that out somehow. Not giving her his last name would be a pretty strong indication that "Dan" didn't want to continue contact with her.

Maybe there are aggressive women like this out there but please don't think that this "normal" single woman behavior. Because it is not.

[Anonymous]

OP here. In hindsight, I regret the interaction with this woman. I thought I was being friendly; I do not notice subtle flirting. Heck, I might not notice flirting unless the woman said "I am flirting with you". I think my initial reaction was more out of the surprise that someone finds me attractive.

I am really glad I did not take her up on her offer -- I do not need more drama in my life. And, frankly, I would hate to do that to my wife. I do love her, though we have grown complacent with each other.

[Anonymous]

Do not take your family to Nats Park for a while, you don't want the .0001% chance you'd run into her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do not take your family to Nats Park for a while, you don't want the .0001% chance you'd run into her.

Actually, probability is considerably higher. The odds of being seated next to her is 1/43000, or about 0.0025%. And about 0.025% to be close enough that you cant mis them. And including running into her at the game overall, probably closer to 1%.

[Anonymous]

I can totally see why/how you made a connection with this woman. You sound like you have interests in common and its really nice to feel wanted. I applaud you for stopping at the kiss. Shows that you have integrity.

I would respond to her by saying that while she seemed like a nice woman, you are a married man and you are faithful to your wife and to continue contact with her would be disrespectful to your marriage. I say this because if she found your FB page, she already has your wife's info. I think you need to make it clear in writing to her that you have not cheated on your wife, in case she ever decided to contact her. She sounds like the type to throw your life upside down.

Ladies, let this be a reminder to screw your husbands and to not take a good guy for granted! He probably wouldn't have made it to the kiss if he was getting it on the regular.

[Anonymous]

Many years ago in the 80's I was at a week long touch feely management seminar while my DH was home with our 7 month old baby. People were sharing way too much at the conference and some people were pairing off. One evening one guy told me he "wanted to give me pleasure" which was creepy but at the same time it was nice to be seen as a non-mom. I called my DH and told him and he said as soon as I got home he would give me pleasure. Or, he would come and kill the guy. I got home and nine months later we had baby #2. LOL - I can't make this up!