While on travel, I met someone; nothing happened, .but I can not stop comparing her to my wife

[ZachF]

Assume your wife knows your FB password, so change it now.

[Anonymous]

OP you need to make sure your deleted Facebook message is actually gone and not just in the recycling (or whatever FB calls it, I got off FB 2 years ago). I remember finding tons of old messages that I thought I'd deleted were still there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Married man here, not the OP.

I don't think baseball chick sounds crazy. It's not really that uncommon. OP sounds like he is average looking without a ton of confidence so it's uncommon for him. I am attractive and outgoing (and not very humble) so this happens to me sometimes: women you end up chatting to develop chemistry and it leads to something sexual. How do you think most affairs start?

Not to say OP should go for it, but nothing here raises unique red flags. All affairs carry risks.

Man here and I agree. She doesn't sound crazy. She's a single woman in her middle ages. She knows she's not the hottest commodity on the dating market. She found a decent guy, who was uncosciously playing hard to get.

I've had APs before (but never where I live... I travel a lot) and they always knew my situation. They were fine with it, and not stalker-y at all. Usually it fizzled after they found someone who they could settle down with and we still keep in touch as friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Married man here, not the OP.

I don't think baseball chick sounds crazy. It's not really that uncommon. OP sounds like he is average looking without a ton of confidence so it's uncommon for him. I am attractive and outgoing (and not very humble) so this happens to me sometimes: women you end up chatting to develop chemistry and it leads to something sexual. How do you think most affairs start?

Not to say OP should go for it, but nothing here raises unique red flags. All affairs carry risks.

Man here and I agree. She doesn't sound crazy. She's a single woman in her middle ages. She knows she's not the hottest commodity on the dating market. She found a decent guy, who was uncosciously playing hard to get.

I've had APs before (but never where I live... I travel a lot) and they always knew my situation. They were fine with it, and not stalker-y at all. Usually it fizzled after they found someone who they could settle down with and we still keep in touch as friends.

Ew

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Married man here, not the OP.

I don't think baseball chick sounds crazy. It's not really that uncommon. OP sounds like he is average looking without a ton of confidence so it's uncommon for him. I am attractive and outgoing (and not very humble) so this happens to me sometimes: women you end up chatting to develop chemistry and it leads to something sexual. How do you think most affairs start?

Not to say OP should go for it, but nothing here raises unique red flags. All affairs carry risks.

Man here and I agree. She doesn't sound crazy. She's a single woman in her middle ages. She knows she's not the hottest commodity on the dating market. She found a decent guy, who was uncosciously playing hard to get.

I've had APs before (but never where I live... I travel a lot) and they always knew my situation. They were fine with it, and not stalker-y at all. Usually it fizzled after they found someone who they could settle down with and we still keep in touch as friends.

Ew

Also +1 EW. And of course you don't think they are crazy, you are looking for an AP. You are biased towards thirsty hos.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ignore her message and block her. Remember that the grass is greener where you water it. Reality is, while she may be fun in the beginning, long term she's going to have her flaws. If she's going after a married man she just met you can bet she's pretty unstable and will end up yelling and withholding sex more than your wife does.

Block her and spend some time working on your marriage.

+10000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh, stop, people who are calling her a psycho! OP wasn't exactly discouraging toward her. "I begged off, saying 1) I probably would do something I would regret, and 2) I had an early flight the next morning." He could (should) have just said, no thanks, I'm married. Instead his response, followed by responding to her kiss, probably led her to believe he has some interest.

I agree with everyone above that you should block her, OP.

I agree. OP was obviously giving off signals that to this woman that he was interested in her. OP is the married one, it is is HIS responsibility to shut it down, leaving no doubt to his intentions. The way HE describes his actions above, I could see where this other woman figured there might still be a chance.

If Op was the woman in this situation: "I begged off" "I told him that I would probably do something that I'd regret" "I told him I was married with kids" "He went in for the hug and kissed me anyway"....."He found my Facebook page and sent me several messages"...

Would you still be saying that this is no big deal? That the Op must have done something to lead the man on?

[Anonymous]

^Not saying that the hug/kiss were absolutely unwanted by Op or that she intimidated him at all. But this woman is v-e-r-y pushy. And now that Op is back on his home turf he really should avoid her - as Op is doing.

[Anonymous]

What industry do you work in? Was the woman a foreign national -- North Korean perhaps? It sounds like you were targeted.

[Anonymous]

Whether she targeted Op or not, she does not listen to him, he does not respect his life and the fact that he's a married man with kids, she is intrusive (messaging him on Facebook like that, when his wife or anyone else might have seen it). She is at best selfish and aggressive. And at worst - a predator of some sort.

Avoid!!

[Anonymous]

Be GLAD that your wife is nothing like this woman. Your life would be a living hell...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What industry do you work in? Was the woman a foreign national -- North Korean perhaps? It sounds like you were targeted.

I'm one of the PPs who also thought this was quite suspicious. Yes people meet people but this scenario of running into you twice in a place different than where you lie, while also coincidentally living in your place of residence is very odd indeed. Either there's something going on or you should buy a lottery ticket OP.

[Anonymous]

Live, not lie

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What industry do you work in? Was the woman a foreign national -- North Korean perhaps? It sounds like you were targeted.

I'm one of the PPs who also thought this was quite suspicious. Yes people meet people but this scenario of running into you twice in a place different than where you lie, while also coincidentally living in your place of residence is very odd indeed. Either there's something going on or you should buy a lottery ticket OP.

Or she's a die hard Nats groupie that follows the team around and was looking for Op at the next game. Maybe this is her "thing".

[ZachF]

Meh - some of you married people must not get out much. There is nothing unusual about her actions. She saw what she wanted and went for it. There are a LOT of single women who have no problem hooking up with a married man.

She contacted him the only way she knew how. Facebook is anyone's first choice for looking someone up. He didn't discourage her and her being aggressive does not make her crazy.