While on travel, I met someone; nothing happened, .but I can not stop comparing her to my wife

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

You kissed another woman. YOU DID STRAY.

To be technical, she kissed me, and I did not stop it right away. That was wrong, I know.

You kissed another woman. You should have stopped it right away. You did stray. I consider that cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

Agree with others to try to improve your marriage. My husband is a huge baseball fan and I'm not but it was great to have a short getaway with the kids at their grandparents house. We watched several baseball games, went to tourist places, and yes had sex, and remembered what it was like to date and not have all of our day to day responsibilities. If you watch Modern Family I think there was an episode where Claire and Phil role play at a swanky hotel where they try to pick the other up at the bar on their anniversary.

That MF episode was great, and really, a great idea. Dress up and act like you are picking someone up at the bar. You want the rush of picking someone up at the bar? Great ... Even better when it's your wife.

And, by the way, Claire is smokin hot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

You kissed another woman. YOU DID STRAY.

To be technical, she kissed me, and I did not stop it right away. That was wrong, I know.

You kissed another woman. You should have stopped it right away. You did stray. I consider that cheating.

Not everyone draws the line there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

You kissed another woman. YOU DID STRAY.

To be technical, she kissed me, and I did not stop it right away. That was wrong, I know.

If you go away to work on your marriage with your wife, one thing that should be discussed is how both of you feel about monogamy. Would your wife be upset if you told her this entire story to get it off your chest?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

You kissed another woman. YOU DID STRAY.

To be technical, she kissed me, and I did not stop it right away. That was wrong, I know.

Yeah, you were wrong. But the good thing is that you didn't let it go any further than that. You feel guilty - and you should! If your wife did something similar you probably wouldn't be too happy about that. But you would also probably be glad that she respected you and valued your marriage enough to go no further.

You can't undo a moment of bad judgement. Don't beat yourself up for it. But do stop communicating with this woman. Your are making this some MUCH bigger than it really is. Stop that.

[Anonymous]

^seem

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

You kissed another woman. YOU DID STRAY.

To be technical, she kissed me, and I did not stop it right away. That was wrong, I know.

You should not have been hanging out with the woman in the first place! I don't believe you are telling the whole story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Baseball chick is a pile of problems. "I will not be ignored, DAN!" Seriously, if you haven't seen Fatal Attraction recently, go watch it again. An emotionally healthy woman doesn't chase a random married man. There are plenty of single guys in Florida.

Take this as a sign to work on your marriage. Institute a regular date night, go to counseling, try a marriage retreat, do something to put your focus there and bring back some spark.

Block this lady on Facebook. There's something wrong with her - this won't end well.

A woman who I knew well saw that movie and recommended I go and see it. She stated, every married man in America should watch this movie. Well, I did go and see it but I honestly couldn't understand her fascination given her choices and current relationship. She had engaged in at least two affairs with married men, and was at the time having a sexual relationship with another one. And no, she never boiled a rabbit or even wanted to expose the affair to her lovers wife.

[Anonymous]

OP: don't do what I did and stay loyal to a woman who wasn't being loyal to me. Ended up with the divorce, and regret all the opportunities when I said "no". Nothing motivates some women more than the attempt to get a good guy to stray.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I also blocked her. I do not think I gave her my last name, but I might have in the initial introduction.

In 20 years of marriage, I have never strayed. And I do not intend to start now. There are issues in the marriage; DW and I are both at ages where bodies do not work as well as they used too. So libido is down for her.

But, the relationship is there, and we work well in a crisis.

You kissed another woman. YOU DID STRAY.

To be technical, she kissed me, and I did not stop it right away. That was wrong, I know.

You should not have been hanging out with the woman in the first place! I don't believe you are telling the whole story.

DP

It's quite possible, and definitely not unusual, that a part of him wanted to know if this woman who he believed was outside his league, pun intended, found him attractive and desirable and nothing more than that. Sometimes men and women just want that little affirmation that they are still attractive to others. Unfortunately sometimes dipping ones toe in the water leads to a slip and the next thing you know, you are in the troubled waters well over your head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I rarely do this, but something about this overly elaborate scenario full of fantasy and coincidences makes me call troll on OP.

Me, too. Thought it was the start of a penthouse forum letter

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh, stop, people who are calling her a psycho! OP wasn't exactly discouraging toward her. "I begged off, saying 1) I probably would do something I would regret, and 2) I had an early flight the next morning." He could (should) have just said, no thanks, I'm married. Instead his response, followed by responding to her kiss, probably led her to believe he has some interest.

I agree with everyone above that you should block her, OP.

I agree. OP was obviously giving off signals that to this woman that he was interested in her. OP is the married one, it is is HIS responsibility to shut it down, leaving no doubt to his intentions. The way HE describes his actions above, I could see where this other woman figured there might still be a chance.

[Anonymous]

She was likely there for the sole purpose of finding a man...just sayin

[Anonymous]

OP, at one point you felt this same kind of spark with your wife. That's why you married her.

Maybe, you could be the person that helps get that spark back in your marriage? Do you ever just go up to your wife and passionately kiss her out of nowhere? Do you ever send her love notes or make date plans for just you and she to be alone?

We all get caught up in the stress of life and the mundane tasks that wear us all down. You have that same spark, but you and your DW have been sucked into the "normal life" vortex.

I'd maybe take from the ballpark experience the fact that you're missing that spark you had. You had it with DW once and you can have it again. It might be time to put a little excitement and romance back into your marriage.

It usually just takes one person to get the ball rolling...

[Anonymous]

I don't believe your post at all OP. I call troll. Your fact pattern is just a tad too convenient. There you are in all of your facts just totally helpless about this woman coming on to you. Get a life and reconnect w/ your wife if you really have one