Are people secretive about their FA status at your private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FA is a cruel irony. We pay 75k a year for 2 at a top 3 in order to get escape the poor and their "poor" habits found in the MS, HS publics. Part of the 75k pays for the people you are trying to escape to join you in the privates. The more you try to escape the poor, the more you become intertwined with them- like b'rer rabbit the tar baby.

I'd love to know which school your kids attend. We pay $70,000 to try to give our kids the best education we can and to avoid people who would teach them 'poor habits' like your condescension and anything related to the term tar baby, for example.

Is it possible that you don't understand the "tar baby" concept and are offended by the term (because you don't understand its usage)?"

+1. Surprisingly not everything is about AAs. Tat baby means that when you talk trash it sticks to you instead of them. Or something like that. Similar to would not touch that with a ten foot pole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FA is a cruel irony. We pay 75k a year for 2 at a top 3 in order to get escape the poor and their "poor" habits found in the MS, HS publics. Part of the 75k pays for the people you are trying to escape to join you in the privates. The more you try to escape the poor, the more you become intertwined with them- like b'rer rabbit the tar baby.

I'd love to know which school your kids attend. We pay $70,000 to try to give our kids the best education we can and to avoid people who would teach them 'poor habits' like your condescension and anything related to the term tar baby, for example.

Is it possible that you don't understand the "tar baby" concept and are offended by the term (because you don't understand its usage)?"

+1. Surprisingly not everything is about AAs. Tat baby means that when you talk trash it sticks to you instead of them. Or something like that. Similar to would not touch that with a ten foot pole.

Tar baby comes from AA folk stories. Use dead white male references, you are racist. Use AA folk lore references, you are racist. Can't win.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Check your aid contract -- they usually have provisions requiring pretty strict confidentiality.

+1 Many schools specifically require that you do not discuss your aid package.

I think this is because there is a wide variety of awards for what are otherwise similarly financially situated people. Admin does not want people comparing awards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most good crooks keep their misdeeds quiet.

Then stop donating and show your true face to the school!
Why can't any aid people do it instead of all this passive aggressive behavior?

Agree. Though my guess is that most anti-aid people are not the big contributors. I doubt those people have time or the care to log into DCUM and post anti-aid comments. The few who talk about not donating next year are more than likely the ones who can barely afford to donate but do so trying to keep up with Jones -- thus their resentment. Perhaps they should try and be true to their checkbook.

So you are on FA and resentful of the people who donate to the annual campaign when they really cannot afford to? Wow.

What? I'm the least resentful of all. Yes I am on FA and extremely grateful to those who donate. Heck, even I donate what I can. However, what I will not be is beholden to anyone. If you are donating, it should be because you want to and not out of insincere obligation. Donating should be like tithing -- you should be a cheerful giver. If you aren't cheerful about it, then why bother? Yes, your dollar will spend but at what cost? Having to read or listen to your behind the screen rants? Who has time for that or should even have to endure it?[/quote]

Mam, no amount of magical thinking will change the fact that you are in fact beholden to me and hundreds or thousands like me who pay for your children to be educated bc you lack the intelligence and/or drive to do so. It doesn't matter to me economically that I pay for your family's inability to care for itself -- Im mid 40's with HHI of 2.2 million which is growing fast. But your ungrateful mouth is annoying. You owe the people that are forced to support your children an apology.

It would be the closest day in hell before you get one. I'm beholden to no one and certainly not to someone whose self worth is in their bank account. Good for you and your millions at 40. Somehow I suspect you still aren't happy. LOL. Happy people don't have time to worry about what is going on in someone else's household, and you clearly spent a lot of time thinking about what I should or should not be doing. [/quo


I'm a NP, but feel like the FA recipient needs to show a little remorse. Why are you so mean to the nice
Lady who is subsidizing your kid's education? In any universe, you should be grateful for it. The logical (and kind) thing to do would be to offer thanks. Railing against the truth doesn't make you look better, it makes you look kind of dumb and entitled. Self worth any "happiness" doesn't have anything to do with it, the richies pay for the poors at private schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most good crooks keep their misdeeds quiet.

Then stop donating and show your true face to the school!
Why can't any aid people do it instead of all this passive aggressive behavior?

Agree. Though my guess is that most anti-aid people are not the big contributors. I doubt those people have time or the care to log into DCUM and post anti-aid comments. The few who talk about not donating next year are more than likely the ones who can barely afford to donate but do so trying to keep up with Jones -- thus their resentment. Perhaps they should try and be true to their checkbook.

So you are on FA and resentful of the people who donate to the annual campaign when they really cannot afford to? Wow.

What? I'm the least resentful of all. Yes I am on FA and extremely grateful to those who donate. Heck, even I donate what I can. However, what I will not be is beholden to anyone. If you are donating, it should be because you want to and not out of insincere obligation. Donating should be like tithing -- you should be a cheerful giver. If you aren't cheerful about it, then why bother? Yes, your dollar will spend but at what cost? Having to read or listen to your behind the screen rants? Who has time for that or should even have to endure it?[/quote]

Mam, no amount of magical thinking will change the fact that you are in fact beholden to me and hundreds or thousands like me who pay for your children to be educated bc you lack the intelligence and/or drive to do so. It doesn't matter to me economically that I pay for your family's inability to care for itself -- Im mid 40's with HHI of 2.2 million which is growing fast. But your ungrateful mouth is annoying. You owe the people that are forced to support your children an apology.

It would be the closest day in hell before you get one. I'm beholden to no one and certainly not to someone whose self worth is in their bank account. Good for you and your millions at 40. Somehow I suspect you still aren't happy. LOL. Happy people don't have time to worry about what is going on in someone else's household, and you clearly spent a lot of time thinking about what I should or should not be doing. [/quo


I'm a NP, but feel like the FA recipient needs to show a little remorse. Why are you so mean to the nice
Lady who is subsidizing your kid's education? In any universe, you should be grateful for it. The logical (and kind) thing to do would be to offer thanks. Railing against the truth doesn't make you look better, it makes you look kind of dumb and entitled. Self worth any "happiness" doesn't have anything to do with it, the richies pay for the poors at private schools.

It is not that simple.

1. Private schools have to have financial aid recipients in order to secure their non profit tax status.
2. There are not enough smart wealthy kids for all the private schools to go around to guarantee favorable test results.
They are buying smart kids and athletes to prep their statistics.
3. There is a minority who values egalitarianism and I am very grateful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most good crooks keep their misdeeds quiet.

Then stop donating and show your true face to the school!
Why can't any aid people do it instead of all this passive aggressive behavior?

Agree. Though my guess is that most anti-aid people are not the big contributors. I doubt those people have time or the care to log into DCUM and post anti-aid comments. The few who talk about not donating next year are more than likely the ones who can barely afford to donate but do so trying to keep up with Jones -- thus their resentment. Perhaps they should try and be true to their checkbook.

So you are on FA and resentful of the people who donate to the annual campaign when they really cannot afford to? Wow.

What? I'm the least resentful of all. Yes I am on FA and extremely grateful to those who donate. Heck, even I donate what I can. However, what I will not be is beholden to anyone. If you are donating, it should be because you want to and not out of insincere obligation. Donating should be like tithing -- you should be a cheerful giver. If you aren't cheerful about it, then why bother? Yes, your dollar will spend but at what cost? Having to read or listen to your behind the screen rants? Who has time for that or should even have to endure it?[/quote]

Mam, no amount of magical thinking will change the fact that you are in fact beholden to me and hundreds or thousands like me who pay for your children to be educated bc you lack the intelligence and/or drive to do so. It doesn't matter to me economically that I pay for your family's inability to care for itself -- Im mid 40's with HHI of 2.2 million which is growing fast. But your ungrateful mouth is annoying. You owe the people that are forced to support your children an apology.

It would be the closest day in hell before you get one. I'm beholden to no one and certainly not to someone whose self worth is in their bank account. Good for you and your millions at 40. Somehow I suspect you still aren't happy. LOL. Happy people don't have time to worry about what is going on in someone else's household, and you clearly spent a lot of time thinking about what I should or should not be doing. [/quo


I'm a NP, but feel like the FA recipient needs to show a little remorse. Why are you so mean to the nice
Lady who is subsidizing your kid's education? In any universe, you should be grateful for it. The logical (and kind) thing to do would be to offer thanks. Railing against the truth doesn't make you look better, it makes you look kind of dumb and entitled. Self worth any "happiness" doesn't have anything to do with it, the richies pay for the poors at private schools.

It is not that simple.

1. Private schools have to have financial aid recipients in order to secure their non profit tax status.
2. There are not enough smart wealthy kids for all the private schools to go around to guarantee favorable test results.
They are buying smart kids and athletes to prep their statistics.
3. There is a minority who values egalitarianism and I am very grateful.

I learned recently is we have specific sponsors who pay tuition for individual students at our private Catholic HS. I'm not clear on how it works or how sponsors are matched to students, but I do know it's the case. Is this common at most privates? I always thought of FA as a pool of money or just a discounted tuition, not a wealthy individual donor writing checks for specific students.

[Anonymous]

You all are confusing gratitude with being beholden to anyone. I am grateful and thankful to the school and to everyone who so graciously donates. What I am not is beholden to any arrogant idiot who believes their wealth gives them the right to fill superior to others or talk down to someone else. So no that poster will never get an apology from me. Not today, not ever. If that seems cold, maybe you should ask yourself why that posters attitude towards FA recipients is not cold.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You all are confusing gratitude with being beholden to anyone. I am grateful and thankful to the school and to everyone who so graciously donates. What I am not is beholden to any arrogant idiot who believes their wealth gives them the right to fill superior to others or talk down to someone else. So no that poster will never get an apology from me. Not today, not ever. If that seems cold, maybe you should ask yourself why that posters attitude towards FA recipients is not cold.

You ARE beholden to those who pay full tuition, they do something nice for you, whether you acknowledge it or not. They pay some percentage of your kid's education. Whether or not you CHOOSE to be grateful for that gift is your prerogative. Where would your kid be going to school without the gift that rich ass-hat gave it to you. What does it make you? You wanted a really expensive school for your kid, one you didn't need (school is free in this country, even for those with special needs), and a group of people (major donors) made it possible for you. However generous and kind (or not) the donor may be, if they ask to be acknowledged or not, you are in fact beholden to them (at least For the percentage of FA you receive) for the education of your children.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, not. You saying so, does not make it so. Feel however you want to about it or better yet don't donate. Wait? You either aren't a large donor or you aren't ballsy enough to not donate. Either way I don't care. Your feelings are a non-relevant factor in my life.

[Anonymous]

Look, your donation is a tax write off. So spare me this higher than thou attitude directed at recipients of financial aid. You have to spend that money one way or another. So you can donate it to your kids school, some other charity or the IRS. No one owes you anything. You made a choice about how to spend your money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are confusing gratitude with being beholden to anyone. I am grateful and thankful to the school and to everyone who so graciously donates. What I am not is beholden to any arrogant idiot who believes their wealth gives them the right to fill superior to others or talk down to someone else. So no that poster will never get an apology from me. Not today, not ever. If that seems cold, maybe you should ask yourself why that posters attitude towards FA recipients is not cold.

You ARE beholden to those who pay full tuition, they do something nice for you, whether you acknowledge it or not. They pay some percentage of your kid's education. Whether or not you CHOOSE to be grateful for that gift is your prerogative. Where would your kid be going to school without the gift that rich ass-hat gave it to you. What does it make you? You wanted a really expensive school for your kid, one you didn't need (school is free in this country, even for those with special needs), and a group of people (major donors) made it possible for you. However generous and kind (or not) the donor may be, if they ask to be acknowledged or not, you are in fact beholden to them (at least For the percentage of FA you receive) for the education of your children.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You all are confusing gratitude with being beholden to anyone. I am grateful and thankful to the school and to everyone who so graciously donates. What I am not is beholden to any arrogant idiot who believes their wealth gives them the right to fill superior to others or talk down to someone else. So no that poster will never get an apology from me. Not today, not ever. If that seems cold, maybe you should ask yourself why that posters attitude towards FA recipients is not cold.

this "poor" attitude is why you are poor to begin with. This is precisely the kind of thinking that parents are trying to escape by going to private schools. Be grateful that someone else is taking care of your responsibility.

[Anonymous]

I learned recently is we have specific sponsors who pay tuition for individual students at our private Catholic HS. I'm not clear on how it works or how sponsors are matched to students, but I do know it's the case. Is this common at most privates? I always thought of FA as a pool of money or just a discounted tuition, not a wealthy individual donor writing checks for specific students.

No idea how it works at your school, but at ours its like a college scholarship application when the criteria is so specific that you know it's earmarked for a certain person. A sponsor will make a donation that the money be used to pay for the education of a student who meets certain criteria. But this is only a small part of the FA pool. The majority is like you thought...a big pool of money that parents fill out forms for and get what they get.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. Private schools have to have financial aid recipients in order to secure their non profit tax status.

This is not true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are confusing gratitude with being beholden to anyone. I am grateful and thankful to the school and to everyone who so graciously donates. What I am not is beholden to any arrogant idiot who believes their wealth gives them the right to fill superior to others or talk down to someone else. So no that poster will never get an apology from me. Not today, not ever. If that seems cold, maybe you should ask yourself why that posters attitude towards FA recipients is not cold.

this "poor" attitude is why you are poor to begin with. This is precisely the kind of thinking that parents are trying to escape by going to private schools. Be grateful that someone else is taking care of your responsibility.

I'm actually not poor at all. LOL. At least not according to that whole medium income scale chart. My child was just really wanted! Make no doubt about that!