Are people secretive about their FA status at your private school?

[Anonymous]

Every time this thread resurfaces I feel more and more compelled to send my kids to public school. I actually hope it's a troll posting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At our school you can tell who is on FA bu the smell of fast food. I ask myself why should I be paying for this person?

Hahahahaha! So wealthy people don't eat fast food? Yeah right. You are probably smacking on a nasty ass Big Mac as I type. Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There was an article in the New York Times a few years ago about the underlying strategy elite and heavily endowed private schools use in making financial aid decisions. While schools provide financial aid to families of lower and middle income, they will also provide aid to higher income families based on certain life circumstances. While they can pay most of the tuition, there may be extenuating circumstances that prevent them from being able to pay full tuition. It is not as uncommon or "disgusting" as you think. Schools don't want to lose existing families who need some aid but not a significant amount. This is not unusual so get over it and yourself. The families don't go around telling people so they don't face ridicule from people like the PP.

that's fair, but the 375K poster didn't say he/she was facing some kind of life circumstance that made it hard for her/him to pay tuition. he/she said the school offered so why not take it.

Is that hard to read between the lines? If the poster has a HHI of $375K and is getting 10% aid OBVIOUSLY there is a financial situation that they disclosed and verified on the financial aid application. Why does the poster need to air all their dirty laundry for you to be comfortable with the schools decision?

[Anonymous]

I always sensed basically everyone at the school knew who the aid kids were because the school had a 'scholarship board' that was full of faculty and alums with kids in the school. It always seemed bizarre that "Tommy's dad" probably read "Dylan's" scholarship essay.

[Anonymous]

I'm the 375k poster. There are financial issues. DH is non equity partner at Big Law. I'm SAH with 1year old. We both have big debt from undergrad and law school and bigger mortgage than we should - I am former associate at Big Law and we got house when out HHI was $500-$525.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the 375k poster. There are financial issues. DH is non equity partner at Big Law. I'm SAH with 1year old. We both have big debt from undergrad and law school and bigger mortgage than we should - I am former associate at Big Law and we got house when out HHI was $500-$525.

I'm not blaming you, I blame the warped philosophy of an admissions/FA staff who thinks that your family is more deserving of aid than the "literally" thousands and thousands of families who make less than $80k a year and would love to offer their child the opportunities afforded to your child. Your kid would probably be fine in any school, those kids....they desperately need an opportunity, any opportunity. Your law school debt that you aren't even using somehow makes you a good candidate
For aid is truly laughable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the 375k poster. There are financial issues. DH is non equity partner at Big Law. I'm SAH with 1year old. We both have big debt from undergrad and law school and bigger mortgage than we should - I am former associate at Big Law and we got house when out HHI was $500-$525.

I'm not blaming you, I blame the warped philosophy of an admissions/FA staff who thinks that your family is more deserving of aid than the "literally" thousands and thousands of families who make less than $80k a year and would love to offer their child the opportunities afforded to your child. Your kid would probably be fine in any school, those kids....they desperately need an opportunity, any opportunity. Your law school debt that you aren't even using somehow makes you a good candidate
For aid is truly laughable.

I'm not using the law degree now bc I made a decision to stay home with my children and we can live off DH's income. I don't think I deserved to be judged for those life decisions. And it's only 10%

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I always sensed basically everyone at the school knew who the aid kids were because the school had a 'scholarship board' that was full of faculty and alums with kids in the school. It always seemed bizarre that "Tommy's dad" probably read "Dylan's" scholarship essay.

I don't think that's how it's done anymore. There is no board. There is the Admissions and FA office. No one outside of that office and the business office knows.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the 375k poster. There are financial issues. DH is non equity partner at Big Law. I'm SAH with 1year old. We both have big debt from undergrad and law school and bigger mortgage than we should - I am former associate at Big Law and we got house when out HHI was $500-$525.

I'm not blaming you, I blame the warped philosophy of an admissions/FA staff who thinks that your family is more deserving of aid than the "literally" thousands and thousands of families who make less than $80k a year and would love to offer their child the opportunities afforded to your child. Your kid would probably be fine in any school, those kids....they desperately need an opportunity, any opportunity. Your law school debt that you aren't even using somehow makes you a good candidate
For aid is truly laughable.

Your understand of how it works is warped. Where are all of these families making less than $80K year who are not getting any aid because of the poster??? These people are figments of your imagination. Trust me, if that family applied and was admitted they would essentially get a full ride. A school's FA awards range anywhere from 3% to 97%...there is a large range of aid awards. No one is being denied aid based on someone else getting 10% -- especially not a school with a large endowment and fund raising power.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, there really isn't a surplus of talented poor kids that can't get aid. Overwhelming majority of poor kids are 3-4 grade levels behind and/or their parents are suspicious of a "fancy" private school.

source: http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2016/04/29/upshot/money-race-and-success-how-your-school-district-compares.html

[Anonymous]

I firmly believe you could offer full ride scholarships to Andover boarding school to poor D.C. families and 99% of them would turn you down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, there really isn't a surplus of talented poor kids that can't get aid. Overwhelming majority of poor kids are 3-4 grade levels behind and/or their parents are suspicious of a "fancy" private school.

source: http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2016/04/29/upshot/money-race-and-success-how-your-school-district-compares.html

Of course there is a surplus of poor kids, but why exactly do you think they can't get aid? Did they apply and were denied? Or have you convinced yourself that they haven't been offered aid because the poster with 10% was given aid over them? You can't possibly think that's how it really works. Again, are they even applying???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I firmly believe you could offer full ride scholarships to Andover boarding school to poor D.C. families and 99% of them would turn you down.

I agree. Most Black people (and I say this as an AA who knows that the poor in DC are Black) first of all do not believe in boarding school. The idea of sending their kids away to a predominately White school to study "and be raised by someone else" is not their idea of a good deed. The preference would be that the proper resources be put I to their local public schools so they can live with their parents and around their own community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the 375k poster. There are financial issues. DH is non equity partner at Big Law. I'm SAH with 1year old. We both have big debt from undergrad and law school and bigger mortgage than we should - I am former associate at Big Law and we got house when out HHI was $500-$525.

I'm not blaming you, I blame the warped philosophy of an admissions/FA staff who thinks that your family is more deserving of aid than the "literally" thousands and thousands of families who make less than $80k a year and would love to offer their child the opportunities afforded to your child. Your kid would probably be fine in any school, those kids....they desperately need an opportunity, any opportunity. Your law school debt that you aren't even using somehow makes you a good candidate
For aid is truly laughable.

I'm not using the law degree now bc I made a decision to stay home with my children and we can live off DH's income. I don't think I deserved to be judged for those life decisions. And it's only 10%

I'm not judging your decision to SAH. I'm judging your decision to ask for money from other people for a luxury item for your child (private school) so that you can have another luxury item for your family (not working when you could be earning at least $250K if you went back to work.) You can't live off DH's income if you can't afford what you want to buy without asking other families to pay your way. What school would award $$ in this situation? Don't they take into account the earning potential of the stay at home spouse?

[Anonymous]

I think the school likes to have a balance between SAh and WOH and I know several families that get FA with SAH situation. I don't think families should be penalized just bc a parent decides it's best for the kids if she/he stays at home.