Food Bank donations in lieu of gifts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our food drive at my church has specific instructions not to give canned vegetables and more things like mac n cheese, fruit in plastic (like peaches for kids and mandarin oranges), dry goods for the same reason as PP. People don't want to eat a can of peas and carrots and prefer things like cereal, frozen meals, etc

wow. Talk about entitled.

Do you eat canned peas?

Yes, I do. Lots of people eat them. Especially people who can't afford frozen meals. I think it's a shitty attitude to have, that you won't eat canned vegetables when you can't afford your own groceries and are relying on public donations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our food drive at my church has specific instructions not to give canned vegetables and more things like mac n cheese, fruit in plastic (like peaches for kids and mandarin oranges), dry goods for the same reason as PP. People don't want to eat a can of peas and carrots and prefer things like cereal, frozen meals, etc

wow. Talk about entitled.

Do you eat canned peas?

Yes, I do. Lots of people eat them. Especially people who can't afford frozen meals. I think it's a shitty attitude to have, that you won't eat canned vegetables when you can't afford your own groceries and are relying on public donations.

Being poor doesn't mean you can't care about nutrition. If they prefer frozen peas or fresh green beans, that's fine with me. do you have any idea how much pride they must swallow to go in there and accept that food? In my food pantry, they don't get to "shop." They tell us how many people they have, preferences and restrictions, and we pack it. I am totally fine with them retaining some sense of control over what they feed their family by requesting no cans.

[Anonymous]

I grew up poor enough that we got boxes of donated food, so yeah, I kind of get it. We weren't turning our noses up at the canned goods we received, and yes, I felt terrible that we were that poor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I grew up poor enough that we got boxes of donated food, so yeah, I kind of get it. We weren't turning our noses up at the canned goods we received, and yes, I felt terrible that we were that poor.

And yet you now go about shaming poor people. Hm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up poor enough that we got boxes of donated food, so yeah, I kind of get it. We weren't turning our noses up at the canned goods we received, and yes, I felt terrible that we were that poor.

And yet you now go about shaming poor people. Hm.

Shaming poor people? I don't see it...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up poor enough that we got boxes of donated food, so yeah, I kind of get it. We weren't turning our noses up at the canned goods we received, and yes, I felt terrible that we were that poor.

And yet you now go about shaming poor people. Hm.

Shaming poor people? I don't see it...

She said asking not to receive cans is a "shitty attitude to have when you rely on public donations." It's actually not, because there are plenty of fresher options available but they're poor so they need to accept cans apparently.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm amazed by the number of commenters who are offended by this concept - so much judgement! This is a child's birthday... Maybe it's not a personal affront to you if parents decide to do something outside of the norm.

Maybe the kid already has a bunch of stuff. Maybe they live in a small house and don't have room for more things. Maybe parents and kids are sick of the generic gifts they get from parents who just 'have to bring something.' Maybe the kid legit wants to collect things to donate to the shelter/food bank/animal rescue league/whatever. Maybe it's a value that the parents are trying to make instill.

Regardless - you really have to go out of your way to be offended by this.

I too can't understand how people are offended by this? It's odd that people are more comfortable with the concept of children receiving numerous gifts for material things they don't need than with collecting items for a food pantry?

This is exactly what I am talking about. It's inplicit in the request that you feel that gifts are "material things they don't need" and "numerous", aka "too many" and is precisely the kind of smugness and "better than you" feel of the request that is off putting.
They are 6! They are children! It's their birthday! I am NOT going to feel badly that my 6 year old is really excited to have a birthday party and get little trinkets from their friends because they are KIDS and that is part of a very normal age appropriate and traditional fun of being 6.
And I suggest you think about being 6 and the magic of childhood, the fun, the excitement of a special day and remember these are kids.

[Anonymous]

^ and because i know someone will eagerly point out my error as a sign of my overall bad judgment and stupidity,
I realize it's "implicit" and that was a typing error

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ and because i know someone will eagerly point out my error as a sign of my overall bad judgment and stupidity,
I realize it's "implicit" and that was a typing error

Hahaha!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm amazed by the number of commenters who are offended by this concept - so much judgement! This is a child's birthday... Maybe it's not a personal affront to you if parents decide to do something outside of the norm.

Maybe the kid already has a bunch of stuff. Maybe they live in a small house and don't have room for more things. Maybe parents and kids are sick of the generic gifts they get from parents who just 'have to bring something.' Maybe the kid legit wants to collect things to donate to the shelter/food bank/animal rescue league/whatever. Maybe it's a value that the parents are trying to make instill.

Regardless - you really have to go out of your way to be offended by this.

I too can't understand how people are offended by this? It's odd that people are more comfortable with the concept of children receiving numerous gifts for material things they don't need than with collecting items for a food pantry?

This is exactly what I am talking about. It's inplicit in the request that you feel that gifts are "material things they don't need" and "numerous", aka "too many" and is precisely the kind of smugness and "better than you" feel of the request that is off putting.
They are 6! They are children! It's their birthday! I am NOT going to feel badly that my 6 year old is really excited to have a birthday party and get little trinkets from their friends because they are KIDS and that is part of a very normal age appropriate and traditional fun of being 6.
And I suggest you think about being 6 and the magic of childhood, the fun, the excitement of a special day and remember these are kids.

Oh my god, so much about YOU and how YOU feel insulted and how YOU interpret this parent's intentions and how YOU think it sucks.

I suggest YOU stop adding a whole bunch of unnecessary insult to someone who is inviting your kid to their kid's birthday party. And chill out and buy some canned goods.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm amazed by the number of commenters who are offended by this concept - so much judgement! This is a child's birthday... Maybe it's not a personal affront to you if parents decide to do something outside of the norm.

Maybe the kid already has a bunch of stuff. Maybe they live in a small house and don't have room for more things. Maybe parents and kids are sick of the generic gifts they get from parents who just 'have to bring something.' Maybe the kid legit wants to collect things to donate to the shelter/food bank/animal rescue league/whatever. Maybe it's a value that the parents are trying to make instill.

Regardless - you really have to go out of your way to be offended by this.

I too can't understand how people are offended by this? It's odd that people are more comfortable with the concept of children receiving numerous gifts for material things they don't need than with collecting items for a food pantry?

This is exactly what I am talking about. It's inplicit in the request that you feel that gifts are "material things they don't need" and "numerous", aka "too many" and is precisely the kind of smugness and "better than you" feel of the request that is off putting.
They are 6! They are children! It's their birthday! I am NOT going to feel badly that my 6 year old is really excited to have a birthday party and get little trinkets from their friends because they are KIDS and that is part of a very normal age appropriate and traditional fun of being 6.
And I suggest you think about being 6 and the magic of childhood, the fun, the excitement of a special day and remember these are kids.

Oh my god, so much about YOU and how YOU feel insulted and how YOU interpret this parent's intentions and how YOU think it sucks.

I suggest YOU stop adding a whole bunch of unnecessary insult to someone who is inviting your kid to their kid's birthday party. And chill out and buy some canned goods.

But poor people don't want canned goods. According to pp, canned goods are disgusting and they'd rather have frozen TV dinners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm amazed by the number of commenters who are offended by this concept - so much judgement! This is a child's birthday... Maybe it's not a personal affront to you if parents decide to do something outside of the norm.

Maybe the kid already has a bunch of stuff. Maybe they live in a small house and don't have room for more things. Maybe parents and kids are sick of the generic gifts they get from parents who just 'have to bring something.' Maybe the kid legit wants to collect things to donate to the shelter/food bank/animal rescue league/whatever. Maybe it's a value that the parents are trying to make instill.

Regardless - you really have to go out of your way to be offended by this.

I too can't understand how people are offended by this? It's odd that people are more comfortable with the concept of children receiving numerous gifts for material things they don't need than with collecting items for a food pantry?

This is exactly what I am talking about. It's inplicit in the request that you feel that gifts are "material things they don't need" and "numerous", aka "too many" and is precisely the kind of smugness and "better than you" feel of the request that is off putting.
They are 6! They are children! It's their birthday! I am NOT going to feel badly that my 6 year old is really excited to have a birthday party and get little trinkets from their friends because they are KIDS and that is part of a very normal age appropriate and traditional fun of being 6.
And I suggest you think about being 6 and the magic of childhood, the fun, the excitement of a special day and remember these are kids.

Oh my god, so much about YOU and how YOU feel insulted and how YOU interpret this parent's intentions and how YOU think it sucks.

I suggest YOU stop adding a whole bunch of unnecessary insult to someone who is inviting your kid to their kid's birthday party. And chill out and buy some canned goods.

But poor people don't want canned goods. According to pp, canned goods are disgusting and they'd rather have frozen TV dinners.

Fairly certain PP wasn't speaking on behalf of all poor people and all homeless shelters everywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our food drive at my church has specific instructions not to give canned vegetables and more things like mac n cheese, fruit in plastic (like peaches for kids and mandarin oranges), dry goods for the same reason as PP. People don't want to eat a can of peas and carrots and prefer things like cereal, frozen meals, etc

wow. Talk about entitled.

Do you eat canned peas?

Surprised about the mac n cheese since that requires milk and butter which might be additional ingredients that aren't available. Milk and butter are far more expensive than the $1 box of mac n cheese.

[Anonymous]

I haven't read every response, but to those asking why not let the kid get gifts then donate them right away: how would your 6 yo react if her friends selected & gave her presents, then she wasn't allowed to keep them? Poorly, I assume. Which just goes to the point that things like "no gifts" at this age are really about what the parent wants-- not about the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read every response, but to those asking why not let the kid get gifts then donate them right away: how would your 6 yo react if her friends selected & gave her presents, then she wasn't allowed to keep them? Poorly, I assume. Which just goes to the point that things like "no gifts" at this age are really about what the parent wants-- not about the child.

Good point.