In-laws had no reaction to first grandchild news??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - many people have in-laws who suck. I'm sorry that you do. I certainly did. My MIL would "return to sender" when I sent her a gift. I told the postman to send it right back (every year).

I think your in-laws must not approve of you. Are you a different race, religion or economic class than your DH? They clearly think they are better than you and probably were hoping your DH would leave you. And now, with a kid, he is less likely to in their perverted minds.

Not same PP, but thank you for shedding light on my decades long marriage; I am a different religion and social class. My MIL is a narcissistic psychopath, and always will be.

Not being able to get along well with others, and celebrate differences is your ILs problem, not yours, OP. Your MIL needs to grow up.

Interestingly, my mom has less money and education than my inlaws, but because she is a Southern Protestant and they are Northern Jews, she somehow still feels superior to them while simultaneously accusing them of being elitist. It really sucks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - many people have in-laws who suck. I'm sorry that you do. I certainly did. My MIL would "return to sender" when I sent her a gift. I told the postman to send it right back (every year).

Don't go seeking offense, and remember that it takes two to have a fight.

I don't know why the PP would drag her letter carrier into a fight with her ILs. They don't want a present, so save your money. What are you accomplishing? Showing that you can be as big an ass as your MIL? Collecting grievances?

OP, why not wait until you see how your ILs treat their new grandchild before you decide that the aren't responding properly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you feel entitled to decide how important your pregnancy is to other people. You're not. You decided to have kids. Congratulations to you.


They raised your husband and now he has a family of his own. They have priorities of their own. They might find their own life and friends and neighbors more interesting at this stage than your pregnancy, which they never asked for.

They don't owe you the spotlight.

You don't like that grandparenting isn't their top priority? Well it's not up to you.

You are a psycho.

[Anonymous]

I had a similar experience my father in law did not respond with any kind of excitement but ultimately he really enjoys being a grandfather.

[Anonymous]

This happened to us. H might as well have told them it was raining. He was so hurt. It has played out that they have almost no interest in our now children except for a photo opportunity to show what great grandparents they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - many people have in-laws who suck. I'm sorry that you do. I certainly did. My MIL would "return to sender" when I sent her a gift. I told the postman to send it right back (every year).

I think your in-laws must not approve of you. Are you a different race, religion or economic class than your DH? They clearly think they are better than you and probably were hoping your DH would leave you. And now, with a kid, he is less likely to in their perverted minds.

Not same PP, but thank you for shedding light on my decades long marriage; I am a different religion and social class. My MIL is a narcissistic psychopath, and always will be.

Not being able to get along well with others, and celebrate differences is your ILs problem, not yours, OP. Your MIL needs to grow up.

Interestingly, my mom has less money and education than my inlaws, but because she is a Southern Protestant and they are Northern Jews, she somehow still feels superior to them while simultaneously accusing them of being elitist. It really sucks.

This is my MIL. I now know why people marry spouses from the same/similar geographical area. Some MILs makes it difficult - and take any DIL who is "different" (whether it be geographic origin, background, class independent of money, what have you) as a personal affront. In turn, the MIL's ignorance becomes glaringly obvious. One would hope to be older would equate being wiser, but it is clearly not always the case. My MIL has inadvertently taught me to take the high road, when I become a MIL; as her displays of selfishness, ignorance, smug and self righteousness are almost comical, at this point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you feel entitled to decide how important your pregnancy is to other people. You're not. You decided to have kids. Congratulations to you.


They raised your husband and now he has a family of his own. They have priorities of their own. They might find their own life and friends and neighbors more interesting at this stage than your pregnancy, which they never asked for.

They don't owe you the spotlight.

You don't like that grandparenting isn't their top priority? Well it's not up to you.

You are a psycho.

+1

It does not take much to be happy for others, and it costs nothing. If MIL is so concerned about appearances, she could at least pretend to be happy for her own family. OP, your MIL is as pitiful as my MIL. Sorry to hear.

[Anonymous]

Maybe with the news about Kaitlin Jenner, when you said "we're pregnant" they thought their son had a gender reassignment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interestingly, my mom has less money and education than my inlaws, but because she is a Southern Protestant and they are Northern Jews, she somehow still feels superior to them while simultaneously accusing them of being elitist. It really sucks.

That's my MIL!
MIL is Catholic and a widow (who used to be a SAHM with a high-school degree), which totally makes her superior to my agnostic, divorced, working mother (with a post-graduate degree). Because my mom chose to be alone (when she divorced my father... after he cheated on her with her 16 year old cousin) while God took my FIL far too early I am obviously not good enough for her little darling as he is far too good for me (we are both similarly educated, earn about the same and for some strange reason even share most of our values). Yeah... and she wonders why I think she is strange. At least me being infertile means we aren't running into the grandchildren problem. Oh the horror.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you feel entitled to decide how important your pregnancy is to other people. You're not. You decided to have kids. Congratulations to you.


They raised your husband and now he has a family of his own. They have priorities of their own. They might find their own life and friends and neighbors more interesting at this stage than your pregnancy, which they never asked for.

They don't owe you the spotlight.

You don't like that grandparenting isn't their top priority? Well it's not up to you.

You are a psycho.

Not the aPp but I agree with her and I am not a psycho not is she. You, obviously, are an ill-educated twit as you have no idea of what a psychopathic personality is.

Your pregnancy, OP"s pregnancy is not a matter of importance to anyone except you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interestingly, my mom has less money and education than my inlaws, but because she is a Southern Protestant and they are Northern Jews, she somehow still feels superior to them while simultaneously accusing them of being elitist. It really sucks.

That's my MIL!
MIL is Catholic and a widow (who used to be a SAHM with a high-school degree), which totally makes her superior to my agnostic, divorced, working mother (with a post-graduate degree). Because my mom chose to be alone (when she divorced my father... after he cheated on her with her 16 year old cousin) while God took my FIL far too early I am obviously not good enough for her little darling as he is far too good for me (we are both similarly educated, earn about the same and for some strange reason even share most of our values). Yeah... and she wonders why I think she is strange. At least me being infertile means we aren't running into the grandchildren problem. Oh the horror.

From your post. It is easy to understand your MILs feelings toward you. Thank heavens you are unable to pass on your anger, bitterness, and general toxic personality to a tiny child.

[Anonymous]

PP, I don't know how you come to your conclusion but your post was incredibly mean, even by DCUM standards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My own parents reacted this way. I was 38 at the time, and I think they had just decided and accepted that I would never have kids, so they were in shock. They came around.

Yeah, I was going to say. It could be how they feel. Or, it could just be the way they are, the way they express emotion, though it is extreme. Someone has to be at the extremes. They could be glad.

[Anonymous]

Please don't give that pp any more attention, she's a dead giveaway because she keeps calling everyone twits (?), move along ma'am. good grief. You are past the inappropriate bullying point.