In-laws had no reaction to first grandchild news??

[Anonymous]

They may act very differently once the child is born. Or they may not. My MIL acted horrible for the first year of my sons life, but the we would hear from other people that she would gush about him ( she acted totally indifferent when we saw her).

[Anonymous]

The fact that they gushed over the damn neighbors' puppy yet couldn't muster any reaction for a grandchild speaks volumes.

Your poor husband. I would absolutely encourage him to ask wtf their deal is if it has him crushed.

As for being in it for the long haul now - um, really? Because I can name you multiple divorced couples that say otherwise. As well as my BIL and his 2 kids he had with the idiot who then abandoned them - the ONLY saving grace is that he didn't marry her.

[Anonymous]

My mom was like this. I found out (10 years later) she has never liked my husband. I guess that was the point she found out she was stuck with him.

[Anonymous]

PPs who think they'll still be kind loving grandparents are not paying attention. These are not good people impaired by culture, they could love on a neighbor's dog for chrissakes. This reaction is totally in line with how they've treated OP and her relationship all along. Agree that DH needs to tell them how disappointed he was, and that you both need to let go of your expectation that they will change, for your own protection. They have too much power over you now if they can still disappoint you like this. That's a hard place to be, and not worth the wait for potential change...btdt.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like they're not thrilled that you are with their son, but my parents (who adore my husband) were also somewhat reserved about my first pregnancy. Like a PP, my mom lost a full term baby the first time she was pregnant. I think her attitude was "I'll believe it when I see it." I understood that, and kind of felt the same way myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like they don't like you and now their son is really stuck with you.

'

yes.

[Anonymous]

My mother had a similar reaction to our announcement of #2. I’m an only child and I thought she’d be thrilled to have another grandchild. She gave me a very fake hug, said she wasn’t expecting us to have another, then changed the subject to something that happened on Walking Dead. It was super weird and hurtful. I see her every week and she still hasn’t really acknowledged my pregnancy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PPs who think they'll still be kind loving grandparents are not paying attention. These are not good people impaired by culture, they could love on a neighbor's dog for chrissakes. This reaction is totally in line with how they've treated OP and her relationship all along. Agree that DH needs to tell them how disappointed he was, and that you both need to let go of your expectation that they will change, for your own protection. They have too much power over you now if they can still disappoint you like this. That's a hard place to be, and not worth the wait for potential change...btdt.

When OP presents them with a baby to 'love on' and they ignore the baby, then she can complain. So far, the only thing they've done is not react the way she wants them to. Of course, they'll probably not 'love on' the baby she thinks they should 'love on' the baby. OP should work on understanding not everyone feels the same way she does about things.

[Anonymous]

You should work on reading OPs actual post..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should work on reading OPs actual post..

These are the ones I found. Did I miss any? If not, this is clearly OP's issue, not her ILs. She was hoping for a reaction she didn't get. She needs to let go of that.

Oh - and the whole 'we're pregnant' thing needs to go as well. "We" can expect a baby but only one person is pregnant. That's as puke worthy as "I thought MIL would have advice or tips or something." Riiiight.

DH and I have been married for 3 years, together for 10. In-laws have always been standoffish with me. I think they still hold out hope he will end up with his college girlfriend.
We're pregnant and shared the news at the safe point in person. They literally sat there not reacting. When I told my dad and family, I was worried the police would be called from all the shrieking and hugs! I didn't expect them to do flips around the living room but we thought they'd be a little excited? I don't know why this is bothering me so much. DH is crushed. He has a younger sister that lives out of state that was excited to hear the news. This wasn't an accident or a surprise either. We have been TTC for months now.

It doesn't matter in the long run but did you have anyone have no reaction to your announcement? Any reason you thought why? I think I'm just bummed because I don't have a mother (passed away when I was little) and I thought MIL would have advice or tips or something. They both just looked at each other and said dinner would be in 15 mins...? We ate in silence basically and then headed home.

I should add too, which made it worse, their neighbor just got a puppy and they lost their minds over it when we first got there. Like took pictures and gushed and laughed and said how cute it was. So I know they are capable of some sort of a reaction! And it's been a week almost, they still haven't called or said anything. MIL texted on Halloween and asked if we had a lot of trick or treaters.

Thanks, Grammar Police.
Their loss if they don't want to be engaged grandparents.

[Anonymous]

It's not just her problem. If you read, it says her DH is crushed.

[Anonymous]

Both my parents and FIL were very cool/disengaged. I don't know if we got so much as a congratulations. We got an "oh." from FIL, and a "Really? How nice." from my parents. Not much interest at all during the pregnancy, and this is from people who can get very enthusiastic about puppies, jobs, new friends. But a baby was just...weird. They weren't in grandparent mode yet. When my son was born my mom came down that week, to take care of me. She wasn't even thinking about "meeting her grandchild," I don't think. She was thinking of her daughter. And then...some magical something happened the moment she laid eyes of her grandson. She fell head over heels in love and is the most loving, attentive grandma ever. My dad is pretty awesome, too. FIL lives too far away. My mom says she always just rolled her eyes at people talking about how fabulous being a grandparent was. She just couldn't imagine how or why it was so awesome. And then it happened to her.

[Anonymous]

Op didn't post the grammer police comment, but thanks for showing your the same negative poster who has been going for blood throughout this entire post. If you didn't have a similar experience, or advice, why even comment? Find another post you're more able to relate to and move along.

[Anonymous]

You've got a nice husband and an apparently healthy pregnancy. Parties who are beyond your control aren't doing what you wish they would.

This is only a problem if you decide that it is.

[Anonymous]

Did you or do you have a volatile relationship? Has your sh complained about you to them in the past? Do you have a different religion or lack thereof? Those are the only things I can think of.....