Am I being unreasonable? Neighbor complaints about noise - sorry long

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your children are as loud and disruptive as you described, you should rent a single family home where there is space between houses. If they are that bad at 2 and 5, they will only get worse.

Another joker amongst us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, remember - treat people how you want to be treated. There may be a time when you want peace, and your neighbor makes a lot of noise that bothers you and your family. You won't have legs to stand on, if you disregard their frustrations now.

I went over twice with an apologetic heart. That's exactly how I wish to be treated. Thanks for reminding all of us of this very honorable rule.

Sure, but "disregarding" doesn't mean going over with an "apologetic heart." It means making an effort to change, not just say "sorry." In general in life, apologies are meaningless without a concerted effort to change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, remember - treat people how you want to be treated. There may be a time when you want peace, and your neighbor makes a lot of noise that bothers you and your family. You won't have legs to stand on, if you disregard their frustrations now.

I went over twice with an apologetic heart. That's exactly how I wish to be treated. Thanks for reminding all of us of this very honorable rule.

Sounds like you did your best but your neighbor was expecting you to do exactly what she wanted rather than work with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sliding down the stairs in a box is unreasonable with shared walls.
some noise is fine, but you can't live in a town home and get silence without a pair of bose headphones.

+1

I imagine that makes a lot of noise. To answer your question OP, yes, you were unreasonable with your neighbor.

Not the OP, but the sliding makes almost no noise. It is the giggling following the slide that is noisy and not the slide itself

[Anonymous]

That's BS. I work from home and it's ridiculous to expect that people "be quiet" during those hours. I would never in a million years create a stink about any noise during the day. If you can't concentrate during every day life noise, you have a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, remember - treat people how you want to be treated. There may be a time when you want peace, and your neighbor makes a lot of noise that bothers you and your family. You won't have legs to stand on, if you disregard their frustrations now.

I went over twice with an apologetic heart. That's exactly how I wish to be treated. Thanks for reminding all of us of this very honorable rule.

Sure, but "disregarding" doesn't mean going over with an "apologetic heart." It means making an effort to change, not just say "sorry." In general in life, apologies are meaningless without a concerted effort to change.

Please go back to my post and read. I out furniture on walls to isolate them, the kids don't play upstairs where bedrooms and office space are located, we don't have pictures hanging on walls we share and we spend lots of time outside. I think we've done all we could to accommodate her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, remember - treat people how you want to be treated. There may be a time when you want peace, and your neighbor makes a lot of noise that bothers you and your family. You won't have legs to stand on, if you disregard their frustrations now.

I went over twice with an apologetic heart. That's exactly how I wish to be treated. Thanks for reminding all of us of this very honorable rule.

Sure, but "disregarding" doesn't mean going over with an "apologetic heart." It means making an effort to change, not just say "sorry." In general in life, apologies are meaningless without a concerted effort to change.

Please go back to my post and read. I out furniture on walls to isolate them, the kids don't play upstairs where bedrooms and office space are located, we don't have pictures hanging on walls we share and we spend lots of time outside. I think we've done all we could to accommodate her.

For an "audio professional", you don't seem to have a good grasp of sound baffling.

Hanging picture is irrelevant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You both handled it wrong.

She sounds like kind of a jerk, but you need to teach your kids the concept of "inside voices." They shouldn't be yelling in the house except in urgent circumstances.

She can't expect silence during the day but it is reasonable to not want frequent running and yelling.

Take your kids outside more and let them run around and yell in the playground.

I disagree. I have a two year old that screams and has a very high pitched scream. She does it because it gets a reaction out of us. We try to ignore it but she still does it, she thinks it's funny. Nothing you can do about it. (we have tried everything and nothing works.)

We live in our own home and so we don't worry about it, but I've often wondered if the neighbors contemplate calling the police because of her screaming. I probably would if the situation was reversed.

The "lawyer" is stupid or perhaps ignorant. She's going to be working from home during summer break?
The OP paid for her residence. She and her children have every right to be there and her kids have every right to be kids. I'm sure she is doing her best to keep the noise down, but you can't have a silent home. WTF?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is so random and not at all related to the issue of noise but OP why are your kids home for 12 weeks in the summer? Maybe you meant that they didn't have school so they will be home more during the day? But really, no kid should just have absolutely nothing to do or no plans for 12 weeks in the summer. Camp, library, pools, rec centers, etc... something other than being home all day.

Just hoping I read that wrong or read too much into the comment.

This is not really any of your concern. And it's beyond the scope of OP's question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In short -- she came over and asked if you could keep it quieter, and you said

1. No.
2. You're unneighborly.
3. Deal with it.
4. You're loud, too.
5. Go ahead and call the police.

Yes?

It sounds like she had an unreasonable request and you were snarky in reply, then she got angry. So, I don't think you are innocent in this, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was with you fully until you said you let the kids slide down the steps on cardboard boxes---that's not typical indoor play.
As the home of a police officer AND RN, both of whom work when its dark, I DO appreciate your thoughtfulness about sleep for those professions, in that manner you're a rare gem--thank you!!

Says who? We do all sorts of things inside with boxes and bubble wrap (we are in a SFH)? God forbid a kid can be a kid and play with boxes!!!! And unless OP and her kids are doing this from 8 hours straight, I sincerely doubt the claims of this neighbor.

OP, do -not- listen to these people who think they are entitled to a silent bubble living in a town home. Or any home. Your day to day noises are just that. Kids play. They yell. Yes, you should try to be considerate and I think you were. Your neighbor is out of line and unreasonable. If she wants silence, invest in some earplugs.

I would love to be a fly on the wall when the police came over to talk to you about your children and their "inside voices." GMAFB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In short -- she came over and asked if you could keep it quieter, and you said

1. No.
2. You're unneighborly.
3. Deal with it.
4. You're loud, too.
5. Go ahead and call the police.

Yes?

It sounds like she had an unreasonable request and you were snarky in reply, then she got angry. So, I don't think you are innocent in this, OP.

+1

OP is also on the defensive side in some of her comments/replies here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, remember - treat people how you want to be treated. There may be a time when you want peace, and your neighbor makes a lot of noise that bothers you and your family. You won't have legs to stand on, if you disregard their frustrations now.

I went over twice with an apologetic heart. That's exactly how I wish to be treated. Thanks for reminding all of us of this very honorable rule.

Sure, but "disregarding" doesn't mean going over with an "apologetic heart." It means making an effort to change, not just say "sorry." In general in life, apologies are meaningless without a concerted effort to change.

Please go back to my post and read. I out furniture on walls to isolate them, the kids don't play upstairs where bedrooms and office space are located, we don't have pictures hanging on walls we share and we spend lots of time outside. I think we've done all we could to accommodate her.

For an "audio professional", you don't seem to have a good grasp of sound baffling.

Hanging picture is irrelevant.

Who said I'm an audio professional?
I didn't hang pictures because I didn't want to bang on the walls we share. I believe it's extremely relevant.

[Anonymous]

[ I know you want a pat on the back for being so "nice" that you baked cookies to take over, but seriously--how was she supposed to know that you weren't sending your husband over to punch her in the head? A woman living alone is unlikely to open the door without knwoing who it is and why they're knocking.

Also, letting your kids slide down the stairs on cardboard boxes makes me think you're not as quiet and well mannered as you'd like people to believe. I bet you let your kids jump on furniture, too.

I agree. I would not let the kids slide down the stairs unless we had a fully detached home. And it sounds like she tried to be polite, but you were bitchy. Does she have the same landlo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In short -- she came over and asked if you could keep it quieter, and you said

1. No.
2. You're unneighborly.
3. Deal with it.
4. You're loud, too.
5. Go ahead and call the police.

Yes?

It sounds like she had an unreasonable request and you were snarky in reply, then she got angry. So, I don't think you are innocent in this, OP.

+1

OP is also on the defensive side in some of her comments/replies here.

She knocked on my door to complain about my family while she had the audacity to turn lights off when I went to apologize for something we were not even doing wrong. Yes I'll act defensive and sparkly. Sorry.