Am I being unreasonable? Neighbor complaints about noise - sorry long

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:[

I have a newsflash!!! You ready for this? Are you sitting down? I'm not in Montgomery county. I guess we just have better services. The individual study rooms are meant for ONE person. Shocking right?

BTW I have used these rooms for working when I had construction at my home and even conducted business.

Knowyouknow#


But I don't care. It's still creepy.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:The husband has conference calls at the library? So the entire family is entitled and disrespectful, I see…


+1
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If the neighbor's first instinct was to see a neighbor coming up with cookies and then barricade herself ... I'm wondering why she expects further interactions to be productive.

That's just weird behavior on the part of the neighbor, and expecting absolute silence on the part of OP and her family during regular daytime hours is just weird.

The neighbor needs to invest heavily in soundproofing stuff or a SFH, since she seems to have ultra-sensitive ears.


+1. I 100% don't get the animosity directed at OP here.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
+1. I 100% don't get the animosity directed at OP here.


The neighbor sounds odd, but so does OP. I'm not optimistic about a settlement here, because both people would have to compromise.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
+1. I 100% don't get the animosity directed at OP here.


The neighbor sounds odd, but so does OP. I'm not optimistic about a settlement here, because both people would have to compromise.



And that's what happened. She came over we talked and agreed that we were doing our best and the issue is the construction. She saw our bare walls, the bookshelves and saw the kids playing while we talked. Nothing wild going on here. She apologized and I promised to keep it as low as possible.
The end.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You both handled it wrong.

She sounds like kind of a jerk, but you need to teach your kids the concept of "inside voices." They shouldn't be yelling in the house except in urgent circumstances.

She can't expect silence during the day but it is reasonable to not want frequent running and yelling.

Take your kids outside more and let them run around and yell in the playground.


Come on! Kids are going to play and make noise, even when the circumstances are not urgent.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You both handled it wrong.

She sounds like kind of a jerk, but you need to teach your kids the concept of "inside voices." They shouldn't be yelling in the house except in urgent circumstances.

She can't expect silence during the day but it is reasonable to not want frequent running and yelling.

Take your kids outside more and let them run around and yell in the playground.


Come on! Kids are going to play and make noise, even when the circumstances are not urgent.


And giggle! Don't forget the giggling.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
And that's what happened. She came over we talked and agreed that we were doing our best and the issue is the construction. She saw our bare walls, the bookshelves and saw the kids playing while we talked. Nothing wild going on here. She apologized and I promised to keep it as low as possible.
The end.


Very good. Nobody wins when neighbors feud.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You both handled it wrong.

She sounds like kind of a jerk, but you need to teach your kids the concept of "inside voices." They shouldn't be yelling in the house except in urgent circumstances.

She can't expect silence during the day but it is reasonable to not want frequent running and yelling.

Take your kids outside more and let them run around and yell in the playground.


Come on! Kids are going to play and make noise, even when the circumstances are not urgent.


And giggle! Don't forget the giggling.


And here, ladies and gentlemen, another example of a high schooler who has never seen a typo before.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, remember - treat people how you want to be treated. There may be a time when you want peace, and your neighbor makes a lot of noise that bothers you and your family. You won't have legs to stand on, if you disregard their frustrations now.


I went over twice with an apologetic heart. That's exactly how I wish to be treated. Thanks for reminding all of us of this very honorable rule.


Sure, but "disregarding" doesn't mean going over with an "apologetic heart." It means making an effort to change, not just say "sorry." In general in life, apologies are meaningless without a concerted effort to change.


Please go back to my post and read. I out furniture on walls to isolate them, the kids don't play upstairs where bedrooms and office space are located, we don't have pictures hanging on walls we share and we spend lots of time outside. I think we've done all we could to accommodate her.


Then why are you asking if you are being unreasonable?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OMG you let your kids slide down the stairs on boxes?
That is insane.


We have so so so much fun you'd never believe. I have the best memories from my time as a kid building things of cardboard boxes and sliding down the stairs at home.


I am a PP, and I am wondering if you are Scandinavian.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:We're in MoCo (not sure where OP is, but I suspect the noise disturbance issues might be similar),and here's the deal.

OP, your children are only allowed 'to be kids' in their own home if the sounds they're making do not exceed the noise levels set up by the county. The levels vary depending on the time of the day and the day of the week. Here's what I'm talking about

http://www.montgomerycountymd.gov/DEP/community/noise-ordinance.html

11:54, you're wrong if you believe that "If she needed to sleep during the day because she worked nights, that would be one thing, but it's not reasonable to ask someone not to make noise during the day so you can work at home. They have a right to enjoy their home just as much as you do".

FYI, it doesn't matter if the woman is a lawyer, a stripper or the president of the United States..she is within her rights to demand a certain level of noise protection, night or day. So if the child you're having over for a play date enjoys 'screaming at top of his lungs', repeatedly, over a period of time, your neighbor has the right to call the police... and if you're 'singing and dancing' with the music blasting, your neighbors are also within their rights to complain.

Believe it or not, similar rules apply to dogs barking. 4 barks, and your neighbors can call the cops on you - and the police has to respond to the call.
OP, I suggest you take a hard look at your situation and see if you can find ways to keep the noise down. Once again, no one can request pure silence from their neighbors, but it is perfectly legitimate to expect them to keep the level of noise down to certain levels.

I'm surprised people on this site don't understand this simple issue.



I live in MoCo too. HAHAHAHA Just wait until the police get there and find out it was some kids in a townhouse. They will give your neighbor a serious talking to about calling. This is the emptiest threat ever. You would be surprised how high those levels are and now never they are enforced in a situation like this one.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I had a neighbor like this once. He was home working on his dissertation and needed silence to concentrate. Once I came home from an overnight and there was a note taped to my door that I was being outrageously loud and he felt like he was living next to a bowling alley. I had not been home in 24 hours....


This describes the situation perfectly -- your neighbor is crazy.
Anonymous
My neighbor once claimed that my premature babies crying during the night disturbed her. Single family homes, 1/2 acre lots. CRAZY!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, remember - treat people how you want to be treated. There may be a time when you want peace, and your neighbor makes a lot of noise that bothers you and your family. You won't have legs to stand on, if you disregard their frustrations now.


I went over twice with an apologetic heart. That's exactly how I wish to be treated. Thanks for reminding all of us of this very honorable rule.


Sounds like you did your best but your neighbor was expecting you to do exactly what she wanted rather than work with you.

+1 And what she wanted from you was unreasonable. I am sure the kids are loud and make kid noises, but if it bothers her that much she should choose a child free building. Silence? Not going to happen.
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