NCS Parents - "I wish I had known x" type advice.

[Anonymous]

The damage control squad have arrived.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The damage control squad have arrived.

Sure. No one has ever had anything but horrible experiences with mean girls who don't do advanced math at NCS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The damage control squad have arrived.

I posted the original question about my DD's experience with the admissions process from our K-6. I don't get the impression that you have even been through the admissions process itself, let alone have a DD at NCS. So your comments about the damage control squad aren't useful.

[Anonymous]

I posted earlier about my DD's positive experience as a new girl at NCS middle school this year because she and I were both very pleasantly surprised to find the rumors untrue, at least in her grade, about the numbers of mean girls at NCS. Yes, there are mean girls, as everywhere, but no more than at my DD's last school, which was public. I'm not a member of a damage-control squad (NCS has no need of damage-control) but a mother who hopes that others considering NCS for their daughters will not base their decisions just on myth or rumors. Being at the top, as NCS is, makes one a lightning rod for gossip and innuendo.

[Anonymous]

I graduated from NCS in the late 90's. I started there in 7th grade, coming from Blessed Sacrament.

I hated it - although my parents were fairly well off, they didn't spoil me. Many of the girls openly made fun of me for being "poor." I didn't have the right car, or the right clothes. I couldn't buy the right CD's. We didn't go to summer vacation in the right places. I never had a boyfriend from STA so people called me a lesbian. I was an "average student" - B+ GPA - and I wasn't allowed to apply to the colleges I wanted to because other girls were given the spots there. My father had taught at Princeton, Yale, and Harvard - but they were off the table for me despite my connection to them. Yes, I may not have gotten in, but I think I should have been able to try.

All that being said, I know some girls who loved it. They fit in with the in crowd, and they are still tight with their friends (I see all of them in each other's wedding parties on Facebook).

I'm not sure if the middle school and high school years are a good time for many girls - so maybe it's just a bad time. I don't think the administration at NCS particularly helps to make everyone feel like they fit in (at least back when I was there).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I graduated from NCS in the late 90's. I started there in 7th grade, coming from Blessed Sacrament.

I hated it - although my parents were fairly well off, they didn't spoil me. Many of the girls openly made fun of me for being "poor." I didn't have the right car, or the right clothes. I couldn't buy the right CD's. We didn't go to summer vacation in the right places. I never had a boyfriend from STA so people called me a lesbian. I was an "average student" - B+ GPA - and I wasn't allowed to apply to the colleges I wanted to because other girls were given the spots there. My father had taught at Princeton, Yale, and Harvard - but they were off the table for me despite my connection to them. Yes, I may not have gotten in, but I think I should have been able to try.

All that being said, I know some girls who loved it. They fit in with the in crowd, and they are still tight with their friends (I see all of them in each other's wedding parties on Facebook).

I'm not sure if the middle school and high school years are a good time for many girls - so maybe it's just a bad time. I don't think the administration at NCS particularly helps to make everyone feel like they fit in (at least back when I was there).

Was it your parents who did not allow you to apply to the schools you mentioned or was it NCS that didn't encourage you?

Sounds like you experienced some cruel bullying at NCS back in the day. Hope it didn't impact who you are today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I graduated from NCS in the late 90's. I started there in 7th grade, coming from Blessed Sacrament.

I hated it - although my parents were fairly well off, they didn't spoil me. Many of the girls openly made fun of me for being "poor." I didn't have the right car, or the right clothes. I couldn't buy the right CD's. We didn't go to summer vacation in the right places. I never had a boyfriend from STA so people called me a lesbian. I was an "average student" - B+ GPA - and I wasn't allowed to apply to the colleges I wanted to because other girls were given the spots there. My father had taught at Princeton, Yale, and Harvard - but they were off the table for me despite my connection to them. Yes, I may not have gotten in, but I think I should have been able to try.

All that being said, I know some girls who loved it. They fit in with the in crowd, and they are still tight with their friends (I see all of them in each other's wedding parties on Facebook).

I'm not sure if the middle school and high school years are a good time for many girls - so maybe it's just a bad time. I don't think the administration at NCS particularly helps to make everyone feel like they fit in (at least back when I was there).

I'm curious about the part that's bolded. I've heard that schools may try to direct kids to certain colleges, according to some pre-ordained feeling, or something, about where each kid might get in and/or earn private school X some props with selective college Y. But they can't actually prevent you from applying where you want. I doubt a teacher would refuse to write a recommendation if the school administration had decided otherwise, or that the school would refuse to forward a transcript.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I graduated from NCS in the late 90's. I started there in 7th grade, coming from Blessed Sacrament.

I hated it - although my parents were fairly well off, they didn't spoil me. Many of the girls openly made fun of me for being "poor." I didn't have the right car, or the right clothes. I couldn't buy the right CD's. We didn't go to summer vacation in the right places. I never had a boyfriend from STA so people called me a lesbian. I was an "average student" - B+ GPA - and I wasn't allowed to apply to the colleges I wanted to because other girls were given the spots there. My father had taught at Princeton, Yale, and Harvard - but they were off the table for me despite my connection to them. Yes, I may not have gotten in, but I think I should have been able to try.

All that being said, I know some girls who loved it. They fit in with the in crowd, and they are still tight with their friends (I see all of them in each other's wedding parties on Facebook).

I'm not sure if the middle school and high school years are a good time for many girls - so maybe it's just a bad time. I don't think the administration at NCS particularly helps to make everyone feel like they fit in (at least back when I was there).

I'm curious about the part that's bolded. I've heard that schools may try to direct kids to certain colleges, according to some pre-ordained feeling, or something, about where each kid might get in and/or earn private school X some props with selective college Y. But they can't actually prevent you from applying where you want. I doubt a teacher would refuse to write a recommendation if the school administration had decided otherwise, or that the school would refuse to forward a transcript.

Yeah, I think anyone would sue the school if they did that, so I find it odd that they would.

That said, I know some schools push for kids to be accepted and ignore others. But preventing application? A very strong accusation.

[Anonymous]

NP. I had heard that the guidance counselors actually did this in the past. My DD graduated within the last five years and we were assured by her guidance counselor who had been at NCS for 20+ years that this was no longer practiced. The counselors wil discourage a girl from applying to a school that they have strong doubts (subjective/objective) that she'll get accepted at and in the school's narrative of the student they code it in a way that a college admission director/committee member can identify whether or not they're reviewing the package of someone who is a highly-recommended candidate from the school. In addition to a strong transcript & scores, the school's narrative can seal the deal for one girl over another.

I agree, admin will not bend over backwards to make sure that your DD fits in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The damage control squad have arrived.

Non-NCS poster here, just to note that those with a negative view of the school have fully aired their views -- no need to shut down anybody who has had a good experience from posting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I graduated from NCS in the late 90's. I started there in 7th grade, coming from Blessed Sacrament.

I hated it - although my parents were fairly well off, they didn't spoil me. Many of the girls openly made fun of me for being "poor." I didn't have the right car, or the right clothes. I couldn't buy the right CD's. We didn't go to summer vacation in the right places. I never had a boyfriend from STA so people called me a lesbian. I was an "average student" - B+ GPA - and I wasn't allowed to apply to the colleges I wanted to because other girls were given the spots there. My father had taught at Princeton, Yale, and Harvard - but they were off the table for me despite my connection to them. Yes, I may not have gotten in, but I think I should have been able to try.

All that being said, I know some girls who loved it. They fit in with the in crowd, and they are still tight with their friends (I see all of them in each other's wedding parties on Facebook).

I'm not sure if the middle school and high school years are a good time for many girls - so maybe it's just a bad time. I don't think the administration at NCS particularly helps to make everyone feel like they fit in (at least back when I was there).

I'm curious about the part that's bolded. I've heard that schools may try to direct kids to certain colleges, according to some pre-ordained feeling, or something, about where each kid might get in and/or earn private school X some props with selective college Y. But they can't actually prevent you from applying where you want. I doubt a teacher would refuse to write a recommendation if the school administration had decided otherwise, or that the school would refuse to forward a transcript.

Yeah, I think anyone would sue the school if they did that, so I find it odd that they would.

That said, I know some schools push for kids to be accepted and ignore others. But preventing application? A very strong accusation.

This happens. The phrase that is used is "We will not support your application". I know girls who have heard the phrase. Perhaps the counselor had a point, perhaps not. But it does happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The damage control squad have arrived.

Non-NCS poster here, just to note that those with a negative view of the school have fully aired their views -- no need to shut down anybody who has had a good experience from posting.

LOL, Non-NCS poster. Yet you're posting.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous}
Was it your parents who did not allow you to apply to the schools you mentioned or was it NCS that didn't encourage you?

Sounds like you experienced some cruel bullying at NCS back in the day. Hope it didn't impact who you are today.

This was in a previous era and since then there is a new collage guidance counselor - and no, it was not my parents - it was the school / her. She was amazing at her job in that all us girls got into great schools... I just feel, especially looking back later in life, that I was denied choices. I ended up at a good school - but it does not have the cache that other schools have.

And no, it has not so much impacted me today, except that I am not sure I would encourage my daughter to go there. I feel very thankful for my life and it's turning out pretty much as I would have liked. Another reason I said that maybe these years are just bad for any girl. Socially, girls can be so cruel - and if you are not in with the in crowd - at any school - I expect you suffer.

Anonymous}But they can't actually prevent you from applying where you want. I doubt a teacher would refuse to write a recommendation if the school administration had decided otherwise, or that the school would refuse to forward a transcript. [/quote wrote:

This was my experience - in the past - and yes, I was prevented. I'm not sure my parents knew (and as a teenager, not having the best relationship with my parents at the time) how much happened in those college guidance meetings.... But it was pretty clear to me that things were set and decided and I had 3 colleges to apply to - a reach, a comfortable spot, and a safety. I was specifically told the names of the girls in my class who were allowed to apply to the Ivy League schools I was interested in.

Frankly, I am guessing this is what goes on at many of the "big 3" or "big" whatever schools in the DC area.

[Anonymous]

sorry, 20:25 here - having some quoting issues. Hopefully you guys can follow my train of thought....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I graduated from NCS in the late 90's. I started there in 7th grade, coming from Blessed Sacrament.

I hated it - although my parents were fairly well off, they didn't spoil me. Many of the girls openly made fun of me for being "poor." I didn't have the right car, or the right clothes. I couldn't buy the right CD's. We didn't go to summer vacation in the right places. I never had a boyfriend from STA so people called me a lesbian. I was an "average student" - B+ GPA - and I wasn't allowed to apply to the colleges I wanted to because other girls were given the spots there. My father had taught at Princeton, Yale, and Harvard - but they were off the table for me despite my connection to them. Yes, I may not have gotten in, but I think I should have been able to try.

All that being said, I know some girls who loved it. They fit in with the in crowd, and they are still tight with their friends (I see all of them in each other's wedding parties on Facebook).

I'm not sure if the middle school and high school years are a good time for many girls - so maybe it's just a bad time. I don't think the administration at NCS particularly helps to make everyone feel like they fit in (at least back when I was there).

Thank you for posting. So if you had it to do all over again, would you go to NCS?