NCS Parents - "I wish I had known x" type advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why don't all the girls who were not invited just throw their own party?

Can the Holton girls who turned down the STA boys attend?

+1 it's a tough year for NCS, but these things change year to year.

[Anonymous]

This sta homecoming thing is ridiculous. My dd is at Ncs and didn't go last year and us going tonight. Neither one was a huge big deal to her or her friends. My dd is not alone in not being very interested in the sta boys. And don't even get me started on the absurdity of suggesting that parents choose Ncs so their girls will date sta boys in high school. People on here are crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What a misogynist turn this has taken -- to suggest that the girls at a very good all-girls' school are being sent there to date boys at the brother school. Good lord, how unpleasant people get.

And if the boys' school has an old-fashioned homecoming dance with dates, it seems that is probably their business. NCS has a "classic" prom with dates that is not open to all St. Albans students, is that not accurate? Women need to stop buying into stereotypes (my daughter's social life -- or life -- is ruined if she doesn't go to a dance) and help our daughters get perspective on what is a social bump on the road and what really matters.

+1

In addition to the NCS prom, there is the NCS Winter Formal where girls do the asking. Some boys do not get asked, and life goes on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What a misogynist turn this has taken -- to suggest that the girls at a very good all-girls' school are being sent there to date boys at the brother school. Good lord, how unpleasant people get.

And if the boys' school has an old-fashioned homecoming dance with dates, it seems that is probably their business. NCS has a "classic" prom with dates that is not open to all St. Albans students, is that not accurate? Women need to stop buying into stereotypes (my daughter's social life -- or life -- is ruined if she doesn't go to a dance) and help our daughters get perspective on what is a social bump on the road and what really matters.

+1

In addition to the NCS prom, there is the NCS Winter Formal where girls do the asking. Some boys do not get asked, and life goes on.

They are different schools. Sometimes one school holds a dance and in order for a boy or girl to go, he or she has to be invited as a date. Prom, formal, etc. sometimes more casual dances are thrown and entire schools are invited.

It really is not a big deal. And I say this as someone who was only invited to St. Albans homecoming once. I recall feeling a little bad I wasn't invited, but frankly in ninth and tenth grade I didn't know many sta boys so how could they invite me?

[Anonymous]

As shocking as it may sound some STA boys never take a NCS girl to homecoming or prom and don't accept invitations to their events. The independent community is full of friendships not formed on the Close.

[Anonymous]

And many Holton girls aren't the least interested in any Landon boys.

[Anonymous]

The problem is that it is High School. And it is a very small community. The amount of obsessing over who was invited, and who was not, and who went to the "right" pre-event party, and who had the most attractive date, etc., etc. You hear this in every single high school in America. It just becomes heightened because of the teeny, tiny school community, in a non-coed environment, with many helicoptor moms with nothing better to do than live their lives through their kids, fanning the flames.

[Anonymous]

What is the Winter Formal and how does that compare to homecoming and prom?

[Anonymous]

It's such a small community that if a lot of kids are going and a minority are not, it's sad for them. They feel left out. At a large public high school it isn't the same. I wish they would make the dances date optional. It is nice for people to learn the polite way to ask someone out etc but singles should be welcome

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's such a small community that if a lot of kids are going and a minority are not, it's sad for them. They feel left out. At a large public high school it isn't the same. I wish they would make the dances date optional. It is nice for people to learn the polite way to ask someone out etc but singles should be welcome

All NCS dances are date optional - and many students go without dates in groups of friends. STA dances are date optional as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is the Winter Formal and how does that compare to homecoming and prom?

Less dressy, think knee length dresses rather than gowns. Most kids go in a group -- some in a group of single sex friends and some in a mixed group with dates. Freshmen tend to go in groups, maybe 1/4 of them ask dates. Sophomores and Juniors, more ask dates. Seniors tend to go in large groups of friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's such a small community that if a lot of kids are going and a minority are not, it's sad for them. They feel left out. At a large public high school it isn't the same. I wish they would make the dances date optional. It is nice for people to learn the polite way to ask someone out etc but singles should be welcome

All NCS dances are date optional - and many students go without dates in groups of friends. STA dances are date optional as well.

Are you being purposely obtuse? The girls who are not invited to the sta dances feel bad. This so so ncs. Pretend no one really has hurt feelings and so there is really nothing to be done. No wonder people hate this school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is pathetic is that st albans hasn't changed this policy and that ncs has still done nothing about it. It is damaging to the girls- both those who are invited, who end up thinking they must really be something to be chosen by the 14 year old lord of the universe, and the girls who don't get chosen. And YES the girls are mean about it to the ones who aren't chosen. The MOMs are mean about it. I remember a mom telling me all about her daughter going, the dress, the crowd, the etc, and then innocently asking- oh did your daughter go? Unless this woman has no manners training at all she surely knows you do not talk about parties and who went and who didn't. I responded, haltingly, - ah no my daughter didn't go. You know- she doesn't really know all that many boys.--- in other words intimating that her daughter is a slut- not something I liked doing but I wanted her to stop talking about it- which she did. IMPORTANT NEWS FLASH about Cathedral- 50% of the girls are there because the parents want them to date St Albans boys- that is what is pathetic.

Important news flash? WTF?

Seriously. WTF? Not one of the NCS parents I know even wants their daughters going on dates at all at 14.

One could do a lot worse than a St. Albans boy who is presumptively well mannered, bright, and well connected.

The St. Albans boys routinely title their dances with offensive titles like Ho Ho Ho I don't see this as well mannered. It's disrespectful and abusive to all the women in the community. I hope the girls can do better than St. Albans boys and their connections who taught them to act that way.

[Anonymous]

Where are the adults at these schools? The colleges allow it also and then are so surprised that there are rapes.

[Anonymous]

Way too much self loathing and dirty laundry in this forum. There are tens of other private schools in the DC area that seem to keep their petty crap out of the public's eyes. You folks should try it too.