I hate my son's teacher

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Years ago a parent blamed me because her 4th grade daughter was not one of the "popular kids" in her classroom.
This was in an American school overseas. This particular family was from Bethesda.
Being in my early 20's I was first confused at this allegation. We then had to meet in the principal's office. I learned that the student did not appreciate me speaking French with the francophone kids during lunch. The mom continued to say that all the boys liked one of the French girls. She also said had I not been playing favorites, her daughter would have been popular with the boys too.
I looked at her and flatly told her that instead of blaming me, she should put her overweight kid on a diet.
Needless to say my principal was quite upset with me. The mom pulled the girl out of the school (there was only one 4th grade class) and went back to Bethesda.
The one thing I learned from this bizarre incident was to make sure not to show any kind of favoritism to any student.

That was a cruel and unprofessional thing to say! I'm surprised you weren't fired. Really awful, OP.

Also, your tone as you note "the one thing I learned from this bizarre incident was to make sure not to show any kind of favoritism to any student" seems to imply that you think the parent and school were somehow unreasonable in their dissatisfaction with favoritism you showed students. OP, a good teacher strives to avoid showing favoritism: this is being professional. Yes, you will have preferences, but you try your hardest to conceal them.

Are you still a teacher?

[Anonymous]

Recording in MD requires consent of all parties, otherwise I would totally do it. I think it could be a teacher not wanting to deal with high energy boys and then not wanting to deal w/parents who advocate for their kids. Another parent whose child had her before said she was ok, but that the teacher had an aid that year, so it could also be some overwhelm. Initially, I tried to take that into consideration, but I draw the line at lying. And like another poster, I don’t mind volunteering at school or homework help, but I’m tired of feeling like I have an extra job policing the teacher. The stress of it all is starting to wear me down.

[Anonymous]

OP sounds crazy and irrational.

[Anonymous]

For the parent who asked for help, what to do, here is my suggestion (it was successful for us, not in the way I originally intended):

Go to the counselor first. Tell her (or him) that you need some help or suggestions with what you are observing in class/with your child. The counselor, in theory, will help you with some suggestions, and/or realize the teacher is struggling, and along with the professional development person, get the teacher some tools to improve.

Over the years my kids (both in HS now, in MCPS) have had great teachers, adequate teachers, and some really bad ones. It gets better as they get older, because they don't have the bad one all day, just for one subject. The way I look at it is this: one of the most important skills in life is getting along with people. That includes people you don't like or who don't like you. I explain this to my kids - you don't have to like the teacher, but you do have to behave appropriately, do your work, and stay out of trouble.

As to what makes a bad teacher:
K - one who screams at kids, slams desks, and tells parents at back to school night that the only reason she is there is because she couldn't get a job in her home state;
5 - one who believes 10-11 year old kids needs need to be like robots, not children
7 - science teacher who reads from her notes every single class. No hands on work, no questions, no discussion. And, if you finish your work early, need to sit still, in your seat, no talking, no reading a book, just sit there.
9 - math teacher who doesn't know the math, so can't teach it properly.

There have been more, but those are the ones who stand out.

Excellent teachers -
K - met the kids where they were, encouraging all, and when they got a little rambunctious, had brief stretch/dance breaks.
2 - taught a struggling kid to read (now a voracious reader!).
2 - dealt appropriately and respectfully with what seemed like a zillion fidgety boys
3 - patience, kindness, respect
4 - ignited a passion in my kid
6 - had discussions in class that were amazing, and occasionally sent an email home to let me know about my kids contribution
7 - let me know some AMAZING things about my kid at parent teacher conference, not the usual, "your kid earned an A, they are doing great"
10 - told my kid the essay they did was so good, it would be used as an example foe future years assignments

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you ever look at your child and then head for the mirror?

probably not, eh?

Uncalled for. Go find your broomstick.

uh oh

another apple who lost its tree . . .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just my sympathy, OP. I hate my son's teacher, too.

My sympathy as well. We had the k teacher from h**L! And a 3dr grade treacher we still think we can presecute for child abuse. Very difficult. We did not think that every child was special, but we did feel that no child deserved to be screamed at.

Here's a tip: When you're continually encountering teachers from hell, YOU and your child are the common denominator. You may be reaching the wrong conclusions.

Clap, clap, clap

Two times is not "continually."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well I hate the parents of my students! Be nice to your child's teacher and s/he will be nicer to your child.

Perhaps you shouldn’t be taking your aggravation out on children. Maybe time to stop teaching!

[Anonymous]

Hey idiots, this thread is 6 years old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well I hate the parents of my students! Be nice to your child's teacher and s/he will be nicer to your child.

Perhaps you shouldn’t be taking your aggravation out on children. Maybe time to stop teaching!

Apologies
for that second sentence. That was mean. My sentiment that aggravation with a parent should not be taken out on a child, however, still stands.

[Anonymous]

The reality is that some adults are abusers. Some teachers are abusers and use their position to pick on vulnerable kids. I had a teacher in high school corner me alone in a hall and tell me that I would grow up to be a “nobody”. (I’m successful by any standard.) I was a poor farms kid and he was a creep. Some teachers deserve to me hated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son had a teacher WE hated. I say we because it took me months to even believe what a crazy B she was.

She called him by the wrong name for 2 months. I told her his name, I emailed her his name, I told the principal. Then we decided to call him her name ( as a joke ) at home to diffuse his frustration.

She told other kids in the class they were stupid. Literally used the word stupid and my son got detention for telling the teacher that was not a nice word to use.

She was so unorganized that the kids were late for lunch every day and she would cancel recess to finish teaching.

My son volunteered to speak at an event and she told him the kids in "ms liliy's" reading group will never speak in public - ever - not just for this event or in this school. My son is dyslexic. He did read at that event btw at ms lilly's insistence.

She told certain kids that they should never raise their hand in her class because it was a waste of time because she would not choose them.

She got the highest standardized test scores consistently every year.

When a teacher says "if I have reached one child today I have made a difference in this world" i think - you have missed the boat for 29 other kids. She was definitely making a difference.

Jeez, this sounds eerily familiar. Would this by any chance be Lincoln Elementary in Loudoun?

[Anonymous]

The worst teacher my DD ever had:

My daughter is incredibly bright- scored perfectly on the MCPS magnet test in reading but this teacher told me that my DD was not a fluent reader. She always scored perfectly on multiple choice problems but would often zero credit on her written responses.My DD was not popular and this teacher favored the popular kids. DD was bullied by the teacher- she would threaten to send her to the principal’s office over minor things- once my DD was not working fast enough. This teacher had her in tears maybe 5-6 times in the year. It was so bad that she once faked illness not to go to class and broke down in the counselor’s office. For anyone who thinks, I think my DD is a special snowflake- she never had a problem before or since. I tried meeting with the teacher and she was never available, was dismissive, and so I eventually went to the principal and said at this point I don’t care if she learns a thing the rest of the year- I just want her to feel emotionally safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey idiots, this thread is 6 years old.

Maybe someone should restart it. Issue still seems relevant. Info old and new much appreciated.

[Anonymous]

My child has special need. The school board created Individual Education Plain. And every without fall the teachers assigned to my never read it. They have a tool created by THEM, that they never refer to. Each teacher acts like they are inventing the wheel. The wheel has already been invented by the school itself. So when I explain to a teach the protocols and advice given in my child's IEP, you can hear th steam coming out of their ears. No wonder homeschooling is so popular.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child is a very compliant 2nd grader. His teacher is a bitch! I don't care what my son does, it is wrong in her eyes. She has even told him that his parents would hate his art work!! I am ready to rip her apart. I feel it is every teachers job to make a child feel special. Sometimes that is the only person that will. Teaching is a chosen profession. No one put a gun to this lady's head and made her pick that degree. I am venting here because I need to vent to someone before I vent to her!

I think you’ve made your son feel special.