How do you respond to open racism?

[Anonymous]

I am obviously a minority but people I know who pass as white hear so much about other races being this and that.

[Anonymous]

I am assuming the racist comment was specifically about your race….?
Even if it wasn’t - - racism is just wrong period.

I have little tolerance for racist people so I just wouldn’t respond to her text(s.)
When you see her, you can always say a quick hello but you do not have to really.

You are right - - she definitely showed you her true colors (no pun) so I would do my best to simply avoid her moving forward……

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

Thanks for adding context. Yup, sounds racist to me. She is also stupid. Some of the most highly skilled and hard working people I have worked with have been been “Mexicans”.

Mexicans isn't a race. It's a nationality.

Is your husband Mexican, OP? If not, how does he feel with you lumping him in with other Latino people?

Also, do not discount the fact that many people in, and from, Mexico, are white.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:when someone starts the sentence with that phrase, thats when I call it out, full stop! Tell them not to go any further.

NP
I have done the same several times but that actually stopped the person less than half the time. Racists LOVE being racist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of you need to learn how to be anti-racist. You are not an ally if you shut your ears off to every racist comment just because it's not directed at you or your immediate family.

https://www.npr.org/2020/08/24/905515398/not-racist-is-not-enough-putting-in-the-work-to-be-anti-racist

I don’t need to be anti anything. I also don’t want your bs. I’m Latina (Mexican) and please just stop. Live your life. Yes, don’t be racist because that’s a normal thing but don’t let anyone tell you how you need to act. What a bizarre level of control.

Calling people out on their racism isn't control.

DEI is a form of racism; I increasingly call out racist DEI supporters for being the racists they truly are.

But my guess is that you have a problem with my calling out other people’s racism in the form of DEI.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of you need to learn how to be anti-racist. You are not an ally if you shut your ears off to every racist comment just because it's not directed at you or your immediate family.

https://www.npr.org/2020/08/24/905515398/not-racist-is-not-enough-putting-in-the-work-to-be-anti-racist

I don’t need to be anti anything. I also don’t want your bs. I’m Latina (Mexican) and please just stop. Live your life. Yes, don’t be racist because that’s a normal thing but don’t let anyone tell you how you need to act. What a bizarre level of control.

Calling people out on their racism isn't control.

DEI is a form of racism; I increasingly call out racist DEI supporters for being the racists they truly are.

But my guess is that you have a problem with my calling out other people’s racism in the form of DEI.

We have no hope if we continue with the racism on any level. Zero. Abusers begetting abusers, drunks begetting drunks, racists begetting racists (even DEI) are all problems requiring attention. End it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

Thanks for adding context. Yup, sounds racist to me. She is also stupid. Some of the most highly skilled and hard working people I have worked with have been been “Mexicans”.

Mexicans isn't a race. It's a nationality.

Is your husband Mexican, OP? If not, how does he feel with you lumping him in with other Latino people?

Also, do not discount the fact that many people in, and from, Mexico, are white.

This.
Many people don’t realize that Hispanic is an ethnicity, i.e., a group having a cultural or linguistic identity, not a race.

[Anonymous]

It’s really more xenophobic than racist. Use the proper words. Just because something is said or done to or about a person who is non white doesn’t mean it’s racism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assuming that's what was really said, this is a tough one. You say the school is heavily Latino. Latinos do in fact joke around like that.

Op. She and I are both white. She has actively chosen to send her kids to this school. You think she’d have some respect for the community she’s chosen to immerse her family in.

Are you sure she's maga and not a far left liberal? Because what you describe sounds like many of the liberals here in the DC area.

Oh honey, you’re trying so hard!

another woman of color living in DC and this sounds spot on! liberal whites say racist stuff like this all teh time and think that their "allyship" makes it ok!!

[Anonymous]

You called her out on it and she apologized. It's up to you to decide whether her apology was sincere, sufficient, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

Thanks for adding context. Yup, sounds racist to me. She is also stupid. Some of the most highly skilled and hard working people I have worked with have been been “Mexicans”.

and her comment is even more painful given that we have a shortage of those skilled people who've been doing the work our citizens don't want to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

Thanks for adding context. Yup, sounds racist to me. She is also stupid. Some of the most highly skilled and hard working people I have worked with have been been “Mexicans”.

and her comment is even more painful given that we have a shortage of those skilled people who've been doing the work our citizens don't want to do.

No, our citizens don't want to compete with people who don't pay taxes, insurance, workers' comp, and make sub-par wages. Whole sectors of Americans are driven out of their work by this, and then people like you say, "but, but, no one wants to do that job." Do you have even the most rudimentary understanding of supply and demand? Or of the definition of "skilled labor?" It doesn't seem like it.

[Anonymous]

If you think her apology is sincere, and she genuinely feels remorseful I would be willing to give her some grace. If it’s the third or so strike of out of line comments like that then maybe I’d cut her off. Frankly we all have things we need to work on and simply cutting off eachother doesn’t help us all grow. If you feel offended or protective on behalf of your husband, ask him what he thinks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

Thanks for adding context. Yup, sounds racist to me. She is also stupid. Some of the most highly skilled and hard working people I have worked with have been been “Mexicans”.

and her comment is even more painful given that we have a shortage of those skilled people who've been doing the work our citizens don't want to do.

There is no shortage of skilled labor.
There is a shortage of people willing to perform that skilled labor at bottom of the barrel compensation.
Union membership is pretty strong and those people are willing to do the same labor but at higher compensation.

I had a bathroom remodel project in Bethesda last year. I called a few GCs then called a few subs directly as it was a small job. All the subs were Hispanics who barely spoke English. One kept texting me and over the course of half a day the quote went from 10K down to 2k.
I ended up doing all the work myself and the material cost tabulated to 24K (i ordered quality materials).
I dont know how a 2K full gut bathroom would have turned out and didn't want to find out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

Thanks for adding context. Yup, sounds racist to me. She is also stupid. Some of the most highly skilled and hard working people I have worked with have been been “Mexicans”.

Mexicans isn't a race. It's a nationality.

Is your husband Mexican, OP? If not, how does he feel with you lumping him in with other Latino people?

Also, do not discount the fact that many people in, and from, Mexico, are white.

This.
Many people don’t realize that Hispanic is an ethnicity, i.e., a group having a cultural or linguistic identity, not a race.

But heaven forbid you are Hispanic identifying as your race of Black, Native American, White, Asian or mixed race. Non-Latinos hate that.