How do you respond to open racism?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yea, I gotta hear exactly what she said to offer an informed opinion. Plus I gotta ask why are you associating with someone you know is MAGA in the first place?

All racists are not MAGA and not all MAGA are racist. It’s a large overlap on the Venn Diagram but they don’t mean the same thing.

There are plenty of self described liberals on DCUM who are not exactly MAGA but definitely racist.

[Anonymous]

We really need to know what she said, OP.
Was she talking about H1B or something?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yea, I gotta hear exactly what she said to offer an informed opinion. Plus I gotta ask why are you associating with someone you know is MAGA in the first place?

All racists are not MAGA and not all MAGA are racist. It’s a large overlap on the Venn Diagram but they don’t mean the same thing.

There are plenty of self described liberals on DCUM who are not exactly MAGA but definitely racist.

Yea I wasn't clear sorry.

Racist MAGA or non-racist MAGA, why are you associating with MAGA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yea, I gotta hear exactly what she said to offer an informed opinion. Plus I gotta ask why are you associating with someone you know is MAGA in the first place?

All racists are not MAGA and not all MAGA are racist. It’s a large overlap on the Venn Diagram but they don’t mean the same thing.

There are plenty of self described liberals on DCUM who are not exactly MAGA but definitely racist.

Yea I wasn't clear sorry.

Racist MAGA or non-racist MAGA, why are you associating with MAGA?

So someone says something racist and it’s somehow the receiver of the racist comment who is to blame? Huh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. She said “this is going to sound racist” and then went on to say an incredibly racist thing. It wasn’t about my ethnicity but about my husband’s. I knew she was maga so I’ve always kept it surface level with her but it was still so shocking to me.

I would reply to the text something like now that I know where you stand I do not want to continue to associate with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yea, I gotta hear exactly what she said to offer an informed opinion. Plus I gotta ask why are you associating with someone you know is MAGA in the first place?

All racists are not MAGA and not all MAGA are racist. It’s a large overlap on the Venn Diagram but they don’t mean the same thing.

There are plenty of self described liberals on DCUM who are not exactly MAGA but definitely racist.

Yea I wasn't clear sorry.

Racist MAGA or non-racist MAGA, why are you associating with MAGA?

So someone says something racist and it’s somehow the receiver of the racist comment who is to blame? Huh?

Are you obtuse? I'm asking a separate question (although I must saying that, not associating with anyone MAGA myself I really don't hear racist stuff from my friends and acquaintances).

[Anonymous]

Look, OP, just tell us what she said. Is it really that hard? It would be helpful to the discussion to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, OP, just tell us what she said. Is it really that hard? It would be helpful to the discussion to know.

If you don't agree with OP, you might be MAGA.

[Anonymous]

Well, I'm a minority and while I would be very offended, I would not say anything more to her. Either ignore her completely or a distant smile when I see her. But I wouldn't make a big deal of it because you never know how things go down - what social capital she has, does she run the PTA, etc etc. If it were not in my child's community, I would go off, but one of my kids has a tough time socially. I am not going to do anything that could make it harder.

I would (and have) told my local friends when something like this happens, so other people do know the person is a racist. So, word does get out if you want it to.

[Anonymous]

OP, I don’t think you need to respond. I’m Latina and my DH is white and I’m generally very tolerant of all this stuff and believe that open discussion is best. But I don’t owe anyone anything so if I’m not up for the conversation, I don’t do it.

You can’t control people’s thoughts. Move on from that person and don’t worry about it. You sufficiently communicated your displeasure.

[Anonymous]

Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

[Anonymous]

A dad of my kids friend called a teacher at their school the D (lesbian) word, I thought would I regret not saying something? So I said "Larlo, you can't say that!", I told my husband and we stopped doing playdates with this family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here replying with what actually happened since people seek to think it matters so much as far as my response:

We were casually chatting at a school event. The school, which is a private school and heavily Hispanic in population, had some work done on the grounds which wasn’t done all that well. She said “this is going to sound racist but it looks like something Mexicans would do.” I told her that was offensive and walked away upset. She texted an apology and said what she said was in bad taste and inferred it wasn’t a good joke.

My spouse is Latino.

I think you handled that well. I would Thumbs up the text, and not talk to them anymore, but also don't gossip and tell people IRL what happened.

[Anonymous]

Assuming that's what was really said, this is a tough one. You say the school is heavily Latino. Latinos do in fact joke around like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assuming that's what was really said, this is a tough one. You say the school is heavily Latino. Latinos do in fact joke around like that.

Op. She and I are both white. She has actively chosen to send her kids to this school. You think she’d have some respect for the community she’s chosen to immerse her family in.