Parents who volunteer for everything

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anybody else feel bad for the parents who feel the need to volunteer for everything their kid does-helps on the field for every football game, chaperones every field trip, flies to every school trip?
And they act like they know all the kids and the “kids just love” them.

It’s almost like they are reliving their youth

Have not read through the comments to this post but as a working parent with three kids can confirm that I have encountered maybe 1-2 moms who are kind of like this. The vibe to me is more like they see being present for all this stuff as their mom job. They either have one child and don’t work or have 2-3 kids and a nanny.

The moms and dads at our school who volunteer take off work to do it 🤷‍♀️ There are definitely some SAHMs who don’t help out. But I guess if they did, they’d be judged negatively anyway…

I’m very active at school. I’m one of the few SAHMs. Most of the very involved moms are all working moms. They just prioritize their kids.

I sometimes see a few negative busy moms. They often are the complainers. I personally can’t stand people who complain yet don’t contribute.

It isn’t about “prioritizing their kids.” Majority or parents volunteering at school aren’t doing a necessary service. They are doing a service to simply be seen. No one is lining up to plunge the school toilets or pick up the trash in the school parking lots. But boy do those sign ups for any kid/parent facing public task get filled up fast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anybody else feel bad for the parents who feel the need to volunteer for everything their kid does-helps on the field for every football game, chaperones every field trip, flies to every school trip?
And they act like they know all the kids and the “kids just love” them.

It’s almost like they are reliving their youth

Have not read through the comments to this post but as a working parent with three kids can confirm that I have encountered maybe 1-2 moms who are kind of like this. The vibe to me is more like they see being present for all this stuff as their mom job. They either have one child and don’t work or have 2-3 kids and a nanny.

The moms and dads at our school who volunteer take off work to do it 🤷‍♀️ There are definitely some SAHMs who don’t help out. But I guess if they did, they’d be judged negatively anyway…

I’m very active at school. I’m one of the few SAHMs. Most of the very involved moms are all working moms. They just prioritize their kids.

I sometimes see a few negative busy moms. They often are the complainers. I personally can’t stand people who complain yet don’t contribute.

It isn’t about “prioritizing their kids.” Majority or parents volunteering at school aren’t doing a necessary service. They are doing a service to simply be seen. No one is lining up to plunge the school toilets or pick up the trash in the school parking lots. But boy do those sign ups for any kid/parent facing public task get filled up fast.

So what do you like to sign up to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anybody else feel bad for the parents who feel the need to volunteer for everything their kid does-helps on the field for every football game, chaperones every field trip, flies to every school trip?
And they act like they know all the kids and the “kids just love” them.

It’s almost like they are reliving their youth

Have not read through the comments to this post but as a working parent with three kids can confirm that I have encountered maybe 1-2 moms who are kind of like this. The vibe to me is more like they see being present for all this stuff as their mom job. They either have one child and don’t work or have 2-3 kids and a nanny.

The moms and dads at our school who volunteer take off work to do it 🤷‍♀️ There are definitely some SAHMs who don’t help out. But I guess if they did, they’d be judged negatively anyway…

I’m very active at school. I’m one of the few SAHMs. Most of the very involved moms are all working moms. They just prioritize their kids.

I sometimes see a few negative busy moms. They often are the complainers. I personally can’t stand people who complain yet don’t contribute.

Same experience. The ratio of SAHM:WOHM PTA volunteers was almost 30:70 at our school. Anyways, I think I did my part when I was a WOHM and when I was a SAHM. I prioritized it mainly because I prioritized the wellbeing of my child. The years I could not take out time to volunteer, I made it up by donating goods and money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anybody else feel bad for the parents who feel the need to volunteer for everything their kid does-helps on the field for every football game, chaperones every field trip, flies to every school trip?
And they act like they know all the kids and the “kids just love” them.

It’s almost like they are reliving their youth

You sound like the one that needs to grow up.

These parents make things happen at your school for your kid and all the kids. If no one volunteers, then things get canceled.

Yes they do know most of the kids if they volunteer a lot and yes the kids love them because they are helping.

[Anonymous]

Bad take and glad it’s being booed. Kids are fun and for me it’s a nice break from my stressful job to get to interact with kids!

[Anonymous]

Very grateful for those parents that put in so much time. Back in the days my work didn't allow TW it was very difficult.

[Anonymous]

My friend’s school didn’t have enough people to even have a PTA. No one wanted to be president so they don’t have a pta at all.

My other friend’s school has no organized room parents. There is no staff appreciation. She brings in holiday treats and planned a party for her child’s class.

You should be grateful if you have a school with robust parent involvement. We moved from a mixed SES area to one of the most affluent neighborhoods in the DMV. New school is so organized with tons of volunteers. Each activity, after school club or program requires a parent to lead it. I am grateful to all those parents who are willing to step up for various things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend’s school didn’t have enough people to even have a PTA. No one wanted to be president so they don’t have a pta at all.

My other friend’s school has no organized room parents. There is no staff appreciation. She brings in holiday treats and planned a party for her child’s class.

You should be grateful if you have a school with robust parent involvement. We moved from a mixed SES area to one of the most affluent neighborhoods in the DMV. New school is so organized with tons of volunteers. Each activity, after school club or program requires a parent to lead it. I am grateful to all those parents who are willing to step up for various things.

I was in the school with no volunteers and really it changed nothing.

To be constantly need people fluttering about bringing in cupcakes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend’s school didn’t have enough people to even have a PTA. No one wanted to be president so they don’t have a pta at all.

My other friend’s school has no organized room parents. There is no staff appreciation. She brings in holiday treats and planned a party for her child’s class.

You should be grateful if you have a school with robust parent involvement. We moved from a mixed SES area to one of the most affluent neighborhoods in the DMV. New school is so organized with tons of volunteers. Each activity, after school club or program requires a parent to lead it. I am grateful to all those parents who are willing to step up for various things.

I was in the school with no volunteers and really it changed nothing.

To be constantly need people fluttering about bringing in cupcakes.

Have you also been in a school with lots of volunteers? It's great for fostering community. I volunteer some but by no means the most.

I don't understand feeling sorry for people who have made their own choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend’s school didn’t have enough people to even have a PTA. No one wanted to be president so they don’t have a pta at all.

My other friend’s school has no organized room parents. There is no staff appreciation. She brings in holiday treats and planned a party for her child’s class.

You should be grateful if you have a school with robust parent involvement. We moved from a mixed SES area to one of the most affluent neighborhoods in the DMV. New school is so organized with tons of volunteers. Each activity, after school club or program requires a parent to lead it. I am grateful to all those parents who are willing to step up for various things.

I was in the school with no volunteers and really it changed nothing.

To be constantly need people fluttering about bringing in cupcakes.

Teachers work hard and educate my children. I am happy to chip in or organize a breakfast or lunch for them.

I like going to my child’s Halloween party and parade, going on field trips and attending school events.

It goes by fast. I’m going to enjoy this phase.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anybody else feel bad for the parents who feel the need to volunteer for everything their kid does-helps on the field for every football game, chaperones every field trip, flies to every school trip?
And they act like they know all the kids and the “kids just love” them.

It’s almost like they are reliving their youth

Have not read through the comments to this post but as a working parent with three kids can confirm that I have encountered maybe 1-2 moms who are kind of like this. The vibe to me is more like they see being present for all this stuff as their mom job. They either have one child and don’t work or have 2-3 kids and a nanny.

The moms and dads at our school who volunteer take off work to do it 🤷‍♀️ There are definitely some SAHMs who don’t help out. But I guess if they did, they’d be judged negatively anyway…

I’m very active at school. I’m one of the few SAHMs. Most of the very involved moms are all working moms. They just prioritize their kids.

I sometimes see a few negative busy moms. They often are the complainers. I personally can’t stand people who complain yet don’t contribute.

It isn’t about “prioritizing their kids.” Majority or parents volunteering at school aren’t doing a necessary service. They are doing a service to simply be seen. No one is lining up to plunge the school toilets or pick up the trash in the school parking lots. But boy do those sign ups for any kid/parent facing public task get filled up fast.

Uh, I actually did plunge toilets as a parent volunteer. Also made spreadsheets, picked up trash, sat on zooms that could have been emails. I am not mad if anyone signs up for any kid time, it’s great! That’s what it’s for! But someone made that sign up sheet, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend’s school didn’t have enough people to even have a PTA. No one wanted to be president so they don’t have a pta at all.

My other friend’s school has no organized room parents. There is no staff appreciation. She brings in holiday treats and planned a party for her child’s class.

You should be grateful if you have a school with robust parent involvement. We moved from a mixed SES area to one of the most affluent neighborhoods in the DMV. New school is so organized with tons of volunteers. Each activity, after school club or program requires a parent to lead it. I am grateful to all those parents who are willing to step up for various things.

I was in the school with no volunteers and really it changed nothing.

To be constantly need people fluttering about bringing in cupcakes.

Agree. It’s just business to keep the parents occupied. The only community it fosters is parent (mother) competition.

[Anonymous]

Some of you people are truly horrible or maybe just jealous. People complain on here all the time about everything school related. Volunteers help teachers with all sorts of things so they can focus on the students and student related things. Having volunteers help with making copies, shelving library books, organizing and pre-cutting and sorting for classroom projects, etc. it’s an endless list.

I never felt like it was any kind of mom competition and everyone was helping because they know how much help any kid activity needs. Sports, dance, drama, all of those extracurricular activities need volunteers too.

I did things other than PTA but our school had a robust PTA. There is a huge difference in schools with larger active PTAs and schools without.

I cannot imagine why this is a thing any parent would complain about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of you people are truly horrible or maybe just jealous. People complain on here all the time about everything school related. Volunteers help teachers with all sorts of things so they can focus on the students and student related things. Having volunteers help with making copies, shelving library books, organizing and pre-cutting and sorting for classroom projects, etc. it’s an endless list.

I never felt like it was any kind of mom competition and everyone was helping because they know how much help any kid activity needs. Sports, dance, drama, all of those extracurricular activities need volunteers too.

I did things other than PTA but our school had a robust PTA. There is a huge difference in schools with larger active PTAs and schools without.

I cannot imagine why this is a thing any parent would complain about.

When you see the other way to live, which is no volunteers, you would realize what a complete distraction. All these women always in the school are.

If you want to pre-cut stuff you can do it at home.

Too many extra people are in the school. It’s too much of a distraction and it’s a mess.

There really is no reason for parents to be milling about classrooms and hallways during a school day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend’s school didn’t have enough people to even have a PTA. No one wanted to be president so they don’t have a pta at all.

My other friend’s school has no organized room parents. There is no staff appreciation. She brings in holiday treats and planned a party for her child’s class.

You should be grateful if you have a school with robust parent involvement. We moved from a mixed SES area to one of the most affluent neighborhoods in the DMV. New school is so organized with tons of volunteers. Each activity, after school club or program requires a parent to lead it. I am grateful to all those parents who are willing to step up for various things.

I was in the school with no volunteers and really it changed nothing.

To be constantly need people fluttering about bringing in cupcakes.

Agree. It’s just business to keep the parents occupied. The only community it fosters is parent (mother) competition.

It can foster an actual sense of community when parents actually know each other and work together to make their children's school a friendlier and more accommodating place. I live in NYC, where things can feel transient and it can be hard to make connections . . . having my DCs in a neighborhood school where we felt welcome and supported as a family made a huge positive impact in our lives here. Volunteers (and volunteering) made that possible. Maybe you don't appreciate the cupcakes, but they aren't what it's really about. For children and families who long to feel grounded in a chaotic world, they manifest something much more important.