Should I assume my parents won’t help with the wedding?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A $40K wedding is absurd. I wouldn't pay for that.

Not that difficult to reach that number with a 200 person wedding, even easier if there are 200+.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A $40K wedding is absurd. I wouldn't pay for that.

Not that difficult to reach that number with a 200 person wedding, even easier if there are 200+.

Or you could just... not invite 200+ people

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

Averages are skewed. % of people who spent less were not.

I never said courthouse weddings were popular, you keep making things up and digging your hole deeper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

Averages are skewed. % of people who spent less were not.

I never said courthouse weddings were popular, you keep making things up and digging your hole deeper.

My hole? You know nothing about the survey respondents to make any assumption. You seem deeply out of touch with modern weddings and what people even do. Keep trying!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

Averages are skewed. % of people who spent less were not.

I never said courthouse weddings were popular, you keep making things up and digging your hole deeper.

My hole? You know nothing about the survey respondents to make any assumption. You seem deeply out of touch with modern weddings and what people even do. Keep trying!

Right, I'm the one out of touch compared to someone who doesnt understand how averages work Keep telling yourself that.

[Anonymous]

PP is just some random girl who wants a really really expensive wedding but has no one to pay for it. Instead of paying for what she can afford, she's trying to make it out that EVERYONE spends $30k+ and if you don't you're a loser.

Maybe work on finding a man first!

[Anonymous]

I'm confused. Is OP the one who doesn't understand mean vs. median and is using that confusion to justify a wedding they cannot afford? Because if so: I want your parents to contribute nothing. Yeesh.

If it's just a random poster insisting that an average of $33k on theknot.com means $40k is reasonable and no woman would ever consent to going to the courthouse, please stop derailing the thread. This has gone on long enough!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm confused. Is OP the one who doesn't understand mean vs. median and is using that confusion to justify a wedding they cannot afford? Because if so: I want your parents to contribute nothing. Yeesh.

If it's just a random poster insisting that an average of $33k on theknot.com means $40k is reasonable and no woman would ever consent to going to the courthouse, please stop derailing the thread. This has gone on long enough!

No, its a random pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

Averages are skewed. % of people who spent less were not.

I never said courthouse weddings were popular, you keep making things up and digging your hole deeper.

My hole? You know nothing about the survey respondents to make any assumption. You seem deeply out of touch with modern weddings and what people even do. Keep trying!

Right, I'm the one out of touch compared to someone who doesnt understand how averages work Keep telling yourself that.

I guess we should just take your word for it! You haven’t proven anything. It also matters where OP is. HCOL or LCOL? And it doesn’t matter if someone went to a court house wedding once, it matters more what OPs cultural or religious traditions are and what the expectations are. Many families will take out 2nd mortgages to help pay for the wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

Averages are skewed. % of people who spent less were not.

I never said courthouse weddings were popular, you keep making things up and digging your hole deeper.

My hole? You know nothing about the survey respondents to make any assumption. You seem deeply out of touch with modern weddings and what people even do. Keep trying!

Right, I'm the one out of touch compared to someone who doesnt understand how averages work Keep telling yourself that.

I guess we should just take your word for it! You haven’t proven anything. It also matters where OP is. HCOL or LCOL? And it doesn’t matter if someone went to a court house wedding once, it matters more what OPs cultural or religious traditions are and what the expectations are. Many families will take out 2nd mortgages to help pay for the wedding.

...are you suggesting OPs parents take out a 2nd mortgage to pay for his party? Wtf?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

Averages are skewed. % of people who spent less were not.

I never said courthouse weddings were popular, you keep making things up and digging your hole deeper.

My hole? You know nothing about the survey respondents to make any assumption. You seem deeply out of touch with modern weddings and what people even do. Keep trying!

Right, I'm the one out of touch compared to someone who doesnt understand how averages work Keep telling yourself that.

I guess we should just take your word for it! You haven’t proven anything. It also matters where OP is. HCOL or LCOL? And it doesn’t matter if someone went to a court house wedding once, it matters more what OPs cultural or religious traditions are and what the expectations are. Many families will take out 2nd mortgages to help pay for the wedding.

...are you suggesting OPs parents take out a 2nd mortgage to pay for his party? Wtf?

OP is too scared to even ask his parent to chip in. It’s clear that the fiancee is driving the bus here and there are some cultural reasons. If her parents want the big wedding they can chip in more. I certainly know people whose parents took our 2nd mortgages and home equity loans to pay for weddings because it was very important to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, let's say $40K is not extreme for a wedding in 2024, and it probably isn't. Unless you cannot pay for it and need to ask parents/relatives/take out a loan! I think other PP, me included, are trying to say that cheaper weddings are OK. It's doesn't have to be at a courthouse (say $100) and it doesn't have to be $40K. Most people fall somewhere in-between. And if OP's parents didn't pay for college and didn't help out with a down payment, AND are groom's parents (not bride's, who don't traditionally pay, so they very likely never considered it), they're not going to pay anything. I mean it would be strange for a groom to go ask his parents for money saying that his bride wants a $40K wedding, but her and her parents have no money for it.

Actually “most” people don’t fall somewhere in between. The 2024 average cost is $33,000. Most people are closer to $40,000 than $100.

https://www.forbes.com/advisor/personal-loans/average-cost-of-a-wedding/

Do you not understand how averages work? Do you think a few $500k+ weddings might skew these numbers? Good lord.

Please share a single fact that backs up any opinion you have. You seem woefully out of touch and uninformed.

Says someone who doesn't understand basic math.

It’s an average based on survey respondents. Why do you presume the survey skews to the $500K wedding?

It's not that the survey skews to it, it's that one $500K wedding will blow up the calculation of the average.

Check out this post: https://silkstemcollective.com/median-and-average-wedding-cost/

Then the answer is we can’t possibly know what “most” people spend on their wedding.

So pps spend time finding the facts you wanted, take the time to explain how basic math works and you’re still stuck in the mud over this? Lol I knew I shouldn’t have bothered either someone who doesn’t understand elementary school math.

You haven’t proven anything because all the data is skewed, remember?. Try again. It wasn’t even remotely proven that court house weddings are very popular. Keep trying.

Averages are skewed. % of people who spent less were not.

I never said courthouse weddings were popular, you keep making things up and digging your hole deeper.

My hole? You know nothing about the survey respondents to make any assumption. You seem deeply out of touch with modern weddings and what people even do. Keep trying!

Right, I'm the one out of touch compared to someone who doesnt understand how averages work Keep telling yourself that.

I guess we should just take your word for it! You haven’t proven anything. It also matters where OP is. HCOL or LCOL? And it doesn’t matter if someone went to a court house wedding once, it matters more what OPs cultural or religious traditions are and what the expectations are. Many families will take out 2nd mortgages to help pay for the wedding.

...are you suggesting OPs parents take out a 2nd mortgage to pay for his party? Wtf?

OP is too scared to even ask his parent to chip in. It’s clear that the fiancee is driving the bus here and there are some cultural reasons. If her parents want the big wedding they can chip in more. I certainly know people whose parents took our 2nd mortgages and home equity loans to pay for weddings because it was very important to them.

Maybe it's OPs FI on this thread trying to convince us that everyone has $40k weddings

[Anonymous]

When our daughters got married we told them how much we could afford to spend on their wedding. The amount was close to the averages that people are throwing around. If they wanted a fancier wedding that was on them. If they wanted a simpler wedding the money would go to them.