New hire thinks pushback is due to implicit bias

[Anonymous]

OP, you really need to involve legal and HR and step back from the situation.

[Anonymous]

She’s handling this in such a way with you to try to force a fumble. Given she has asserted racial bias, you should follow procedure at your company for handling complaints of racial bias. If you do not, you may be the fall gal later. Turn the matter over to HR, their job is to limit risk for the company.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reality is if she was a white man she would be considered assertive.

We do judge women, especially black women, differently when they are assertive.

Men use direct language and women use collaborative language. When a woman uses direct language they are called aggressive.

She is right, your feedback is based on unconscious bias. So now what do you do?

Also listing the thing she does to support your unconscious bias is called confirmation bias.

Everybody has bias. It’s fine, relax.

This article may help.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/why-women-called-aggressive-while-men-assertive-limor-bergman-nfmfc#:~:text=Stereotypes%20and%20Gender%20Norms%3A&text=Meanwhile%2C%20men%20are%20expected%20to,being%20labeled%20as%20%22aggressive.%22

She needs to be aware that her communication has intention and impact and because of unconscious bias people don’t receive her message as she intends. Her intention and impact do not line up. Sure it’s not fair that people are emotionally traumatized when women are assertive but you can’t change that.

As for the staff. They sound like they are simply going through storming and norming process. This happens to every new team. She is making changes and people are acting like babies. Obviously you can’t say that.

If you are unaware of what storming forming norming performing is this explains it.

https://www.mindtools.com/abyj5fi/forming-storming-norming-and-performing

Take the emotion out of the conversation.

She wants them to do X they want to do Y. Unless they can show value at not doing it her way they need to suck it up.

You also need to manage the storming stage better I’m sure you can google it.

And if this comment were made by a white man, it would be mansplaining.

You know nothing of the situation beyond what the OP shared. By these standards, it is impossible for a black person to act inappropriately in a work setting. Time to chill out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She’s handling this in such a way with you to try to force a fumble. Given she has asserted racial bias, you should follow procedure at your company for handling complaints of racial bias. If you do not, you may be the fall gal later. Turn the matter over to HR, their job is to limit risk for the company.

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's a terrible hire and employee who'll cause a mass exodus from your company.


This is what happens when idiot companies use DEI rather than qualifications for hiring people.

Newsflash: people can be terrible employees no matter what race they are. There are terrible employees who are white, black, Asian, Indian, Hispanic.....people cannot use their race to hide behind when they're performing terribly.

WTAF? You think this woman was hired just because she’s black?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there any way in the world for a white woman to say to a black woman, "Please at least consider the possibility that this is not about race and gender, but that you are behaving in a way that would be perceived negatively regardless of your race and gender"?

I feel like... yes, racism is real. Yes, many many many black women and men struggle against negative stereotyping in the workplace... but the existence of bias and racist stereotypes does not mean it's okay to blame all criticism on racism!

But I feel like if you say that, it's just taken as more proof of your unconscious racism.

Yep, all this. As a woman who has experienced direct sexism, it is hard to call out sexism when it happens to you - much easier when you see it happen to others. I definitely speak up when I see it happen to others, usually behind their back. You need to both be her advocate, but also a mentor. It sounds like she knows everything though, and those people have nothing to learn, so in this case seek advice from your supervisor and HR. Document document document.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She’s handling this in such a way with you to try to force a fumble. Given she has asserted racial bias, you should follow procedure at your company for handling complaints of racial bias. If you do not, you may be the fall gal later. Turn the matter over to HR, their job is to limit risk for the company.

+1
And inform your line.

[Anonymous]

Do not respond to the email OP. Send it straight to HR/legal.

She is creating a paper trail. Processes exist for a reason and you need to follow them to a T now. If someone accused me in writing of being racially biased, I would not engage further with that person without legal in the room. Risky stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi, I’m looking for some advice about handling a tricky workplace situation. We recently hired a new senior manager, who is a black woman. She is supervising a diverse team, and has been breaking a lot china in her first few months on the job, leading to a lot of unhappiness and complaints from her staff. She has also been ignoring various institutional processes. She is very smart and very capable, but she tends to spend a lot of time telling everyone else how important and smart she is, and not a lot of time listening.

As her supervisor, I finally had to have a hard conversation with her, a very similar conversation to one I have had over the years with many others, in which I told her she’s great, and has a wonderful ideas, but that we need her to do a little bit more listening and checking in with people before she charges ahead on things. She did not take this well, and responded with a long email saying that she thinks the pushback she is getting, both from her staff, and from me, is due to the implicit bias people have about working with a black woman in a leadership position. (I am a white woman.)

I don’t for a moment dispute the fact that black women face all kinds of micro aggression and bias that white men or women would not. And, of course, telling someone their behavior is affected by implicit unconscious bias is a non-rebuttable proposition. However, this woman is doing what I have seen many other people, black, white, male, and female, do over the years, which is alienating everyone around her by grandstanding and being heavy-handed, instead of turning her staff into her allies and supporters.

Any thoughts on how to respond to her? On the one hand, I don’t want to do anything that further convinces her that all criticism is coming out of unconscious racial bias on the other hand, I don’t think the existence of racism in the world should be a free pass for anyone to be a jerk in the workplace, which is frankly what she is doing. Advice?

This always happens. There are hundreds of posts like this on this forum and more on others. This is one of the reasons they are not hired in the first place. Everything, every single thing becomes about race.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's a terrible hire and employee who'll cause a mass exodus from your company.


This is what happens when idiot companies use DEI rather than qualifications for hiring people.

Newsflash: people can be terrible employees no matter what race they are. There are terrible employees who are white, black, Asian, Indian, Hispanic.....people cannot use their race to hide behind when they're performing terribly.

WTAF? You think this woman was hired just because she’s black?

She's clearly an awful employee. The interviewers should have easily picked up on her awful EQ and management abilities, which should have immediately disqualified her for the role. Yet she got the job somehow. How exactly does that happen then? DEI initiatives and quotas, that's how.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's a terrible hire and employee who'll cause a mass exodus from your company.


This is what happens when idiot companies use DEI rather than qualifications for hiring people.

Newsflash: people can be terrible employees no matter what race they are. There are terrible employees who are white, black, Asian, Indian, Hispanic.....people cannot use their race to hide behind when they're performing terribly.

WTAF? You think this woman was hired just because she’s black?

She's clearly an awful employee. The interviewers should have easily picked up on her awful EQ and management abilities, which should have immediately disqualified her for the role. Yet she got the job somehow. How exactly does that happen then? DEI initiatives and quotas, that's how.

Right. Clearly the only reason. Because no white male was ever hired and turned out to be abrasive.

This isn’t implicit bias, it’s explicit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sigh.

DEI expert, with direct experience in transformative change management and EEO compliance.

A couple of things:

1. What was the senior manager hired to do? If she was brought in specifically to innovate, then yeah, the existing team is going to have some feelings.

2. How was the team performing prior to her hire?

3. As a Black woman in leadership, I have to constantly remind people that my opinion is based upon my expertise. And that I am quite literally an expert in my field with decades of experience. This comes up when people who are not qualified to make leadership calls in my area of work want to debate a course of action and expect that I take those points seriously. It’s insulting and generally only happens to black women. Think junior analyst sending an email to the COO to question a leadership call. And the c-suite team responding with “well, that is an interesting point…”….when the point that was being made is something along the lines of peanut butter is better with jam than honey, but the discussion was about Justice 40 policy implications on federal procurement.

4. Unless the new hire is doing something unethical or illegal, stay out of it. The team doesn’t get to go around her because they don’t like the marching orders. You allowing that to happen IS undermining a new leader, and unless you’ve done EXACTLY the same thing with other challenging managers, that’s a liability area of risk for the company.

5. Be VERY careful with a PIP. What resources or supports have you offered this new leader? If you go to a PIP before trying to address any support areas, after she raised the issue of bias…be prepared for a retaliation claim.

6. IME, nice progressive types never think they are being biased or racist. Being nice is not the opposite of being racist. And some of the most egregious behaviors I’ve seen professionally came from nice progressives.

7. OP some of your posts read a bit…paternalistic…which I bet lands in similar ways in person. I think that you think you’re doing the right things, but again liability and risk. I strongly encourage you to speak with your general counsel, because you should treat the allegations of racially motivated bias which is discrimination of a protected class as a formal complaint.

Do you do the performative sighing when you have these discussions in real life too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there any way in the world for a white woman to say to a black woman, "Please at least consider the possibility that this is not about race and gender, but that you are behaving in a way that would be perceived negatively regardless of your race and gender"?

I feel like... yes, racism is real. Yes, many many many black women and men struggle against negative stereotyping in the workplace... but the existence of bias and racist stereotypes does not mean it's okay to blame all criticism on racism!

But I feel like if you say that, it's just taken as more proof of your unconscious racism.

Trust me this fact is well known and being exploited

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reality is if she was a white man she would be considered assertive.

We do judge women, especially black women, differently when they are assertive.

Men use direct language and women use collaborative language. When a woman uses direct language they are called aggressive.

She is right, your feedback is based on unconscious bias. So now what do you do?

Also listing the thing she does to support your unconscious bias is called confirmation bias.

Everybody has bias. It’s fine, relax.

This article may help.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/why-women-called-aggressive-while-men-assertive-limor-bergman-nfmfc#:~:text=Stereotypes%20and%20Gender%20Norms%3A&text=Meanwhile%2C%20men%20are%20expected%20to,being%20labeled%20as%20%22aggressive.%22

She needs to be aware that her communication has intention and impact and because of unconscious bias people don’t receive her message as she intends. Her intention and impact do not line up. Sure it’s not fair that people are emotionally traumatized when women are assertive but you can’t change that.

As for the staff. They sound like they are simply going through storming and norming process. This happens to every new team. She is making changes and people are acting like babies. Obviously you can’t say that.

If you are unaware of what storming forming norming performing is this explains it.

https://www.mindtools.com/abyj5fi/forming-storming-norming-and-performing

Take the emotion out of the conversation.

She wants them to do X they want to do Y. Unless they can show value at not doing it her way they need to suck it up.

You also need to manage the storming stage better I’m sure you can google it.

Not true.
My white make ex is being fired for exactly what this woman is doing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am very happy to read that the white woman brought this issue up. I wish our workplaces were safe spaces to discuss these things without risking a job, a lawsuit, or offering black women a pathway to better leadership. I often think black women leaders feel they need to overcompensate and lead with an iron fist. This is a cultural way to gain respect. 

My recommendation is to send this leader to training or hire a black leadership coach who can serve as a liaison to say the hard things that the white woman can't or is afraid to say. Leadership coaches are supposed to hit the sore spots. I had an Asian male as a leadership coach, and I am a black woman. I really enjoyed his perspectives, approaches, and neutral observations. He was often in situations where racial bias was overwhelmingly obvious. He mastered handling it without creating tension. I learned so much from him and have excelled in many areas. White men and women live in a different reality, and these comments that demand that you fire her or try a legal approach prove how most white people address conflict or tension.

I think this leader has potential, and her austere exterior might be the perfect approach for a different type of team. Figure out how to get the most out of her that is best for your organization.

OP again. Thank you, PP. This is the thing: I actually like her a lot and think she is super-talented! I want her to succeed and be the superstar she can be. I just don't know how to talk to her about this. It would be easier if we knew each other better, and some trust had been built up, but we don't have that relationship. I don't want to make things worse, but don't know if there is any way to make them better.

OP, I think you need to understand that she may sue the company and name you. You really need to watch your boundaries a lot better. The idea of hiring a leadership coach is one to raise with management. You really should be talking with HR and general counsel about all of this. Not seeing yourself as some yoda/big sister figure.

I appreciate your good intentions but goodness, watch your back! And that of your organization.

This is exactly right. OP, she has made an accusation of bias to her supervisor. Failure to address or investigate those claims has have a significant impact down the road, if this comes to litigation. You simply can't be in the position where she can claim you (her supervisor) ignored or buried claims of racial or gender discrimination. YUou need to involve HR, and they likely will involve your legal department.