Teacher Embarrasses 3rd Grader

[Anonymous]

Thank you for sticking up for your child. I had a teacher very similar to this in 4th grade. Not the same story but the “tactics” were the same. She told me I wasn’t motivated among other things that I can’t remember, she said this in front the class. There was a meeting with the teacher, my parents and the principal. Teacher said she wouldn’t do it again and then essentially refused to talk to me the rest of the year. I remember her being very cold to me the rest of the year and it was miserable for me.
Op, I believe that this happened to your daughter. I’m so sorry this happened to you all. Thank heavens for the K teacher who will take her under her wing now. I’m so thankful for the teachers who helped me along the way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Troll

Yeah. I’m an elementary school principal. There’s no way they would have had this conference with the kindergarten teacher there. This is made up.

What if this was at a charter school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Troll

Yeah. I’m an elementary school principal. There’s no way they would have had this conference with the kindergarten teacher there. This is made up.

What if this was at a charter school?

Still doesn’t matter. The issue was about the third grade teacher. You do not involve other teachers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not knowing any of the people involved— or their propensity to embellish or not — I’d say a conference with the teachers, and possibly with the principal and both teachers would be my next step. The teacher could have been appallingly inappropriate, and, if so, that needs to be dealt with, including seriously considering a class change, if possible.

OTOH, I’ve known teachers to informally work as a team. Younger kids would be sent to higher grade classes to read with more advanced buddies. Kids who were having difficulty settling down might be sent to a Kindergarten class to “help out” or to have a break. This last intervention was often a good one, since the kids familiar with the K teachers knew them to be very kind and patient— with high expectations for good behavior. In the examples I’m recalling, it was a win-win, and not a punishment— although I can imagine an embarrassed student feeling publicly embarrassed.

tldr: Gather more information before deciding on a course of action.

What the heck is this narrative you’ve fabricated. Sure older kids do mentor younger kids in very structured scenarios. You’re essentially rewriting what OPs child said. Not only that, others are jumping on the blame the victim bandwagon. Go TF away. Some teachers are dysfunctional. Some are power tripping bullies. My sister has been a special ed teacher for 30+ years. She has turned children’s lives around. She mostly deals with shitty parents. She’s also deals with very shitty teachers. OP, I believe your daughter. Do whatever it takes to get a public apology for your daughter in her classroom, in front of her peers.

That is not going to happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP Here - I wanted to provide an update. We had a conference yesterday with the 3rd grade teacher, the kindergarten teacher, and the principal to discuss what happened. The teacher said that when my daughter didn't complete the assignment given, she asked why and my daughter said that she didn't know how to do it. The teacher said that didn't understand why my daughter wouldn't know how to do this work. She quizzed her on a couple of subtraction facts and my daughter couldn't answer them. The teacher didn't understand why my daughter isn't grasping what the teacher believes are foundational math concepts. So, she took my daughter down to a kindergarten class to see if that teacher could explain those concepts to her. The kindergarten teacher said that she asked my daughter to step aside to a quiet area of the room because she did not want my daughter to hear the two teachers discussing her. Once the teachers finished discussing what my daughter was having trouble with, the kindergarten teacher suggested that couldn't help at that very moment. The kindergarten teacher said she was not comfortable addressing this "on the spot" and in front of my daughter or the rest of her class. My daughter's 3rd grade teacher did apologize for the situation, but said that felt that she had no other choice. We ended the meeting with a plan to meet in December to assess if my daughter needs to be moved to another class that fits her learning style and make sure that her IEP covers support for some additional foundational math topics. Interestingly though, after the meeting, the kindergarten teacher walked with me to the parking lot and explained that she didn't like what happened. She said that she was very uncomfortable with the level of frustration the 3rd grade teacher displayed when she came to the kindergarten classroom. Which is why she asked my daughter to go to another part of the room. The kindergarten teacher also offered to spend some time after school twice a week to help my daughter catch up. We are beyond thankful for this kindergarten teacher.

Sorry this is such a long post, but thank everyone for your pointers and suggestions. They came in handy and I think we'll be on a good path going forward.

What school is this that the teacher walked you to the car and is offering to tutor your child one on one, which is not allowed? It sounds like BS, sorry.

Yeah, this is total nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - While the situation may seem unbelievable, it actually happened. My daughter has no frame of reference to make up such a situation. And I don't know if the teacher left her class unsupervised. Thank you PPs with the advice about speaking with the principal and teacher and requesting an apology. I will definitely be pursuing those ideas.

Get your butt down to that school and demand that your kid is moved if not that teacher goes

Jesus parent your kid that means putting the trash away from them immediately

Why in the world did you post here and not get to that school

[Anonymous]

That teacher is a POS and should be fired IMMEDIATELY. My 4th grader has ADHD and I would be livid if she were ever treated this way. What a sadistic shit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - While the situation may seem unbelievable, it actually happened. My daughter has no frame of reference to make up such a situation. And I don't know if the teacher left her class unsupervised. Thank you PPs with the advice about speaking with the principal and teacher and requesting an apology. I will definitely be pursuing those ideas.

Find out what really happened before you go demanding apologies.

+100, and remember the truth is somewhere in the middle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I taught third grade for 15 years, and I absolutely believe that a third grader with ADHD could remember an interaction like this with detail. Kids with ADHD or LDs often have incredible memory in certain domains.

The rest of the class is also affected by this interaction, so the principal definitely needs to get involved.

Still not convinced. My daughter with ADHD, same age, absolutely recalls things in a way that make her seem like the aggrieved victim when the truth is anything but. Nobody is saying ignore and disbelieve, rather, get all the information first before demanding apologies and other drastic moves.

OP again - I absolutely agree. I wouldn't go in with her story being the gospel. It's best to find out what happened. However, with her having no frame of reference for this kind of situation, I do believe there is enough truth that something unkind happened. And whatever that unkindness is needs to be addressed. We're talking about kids in a 3rd grade class. She's not a bad child, she is not disruptive. In all she's a typical kid that isn't always an angel, but I don't think anything with a missed assignment would require embarrassment of any kind. That's what I want to address in a way that gets a good outcome for her.

You keep saying no frame of reference? She could have heard other kids talking, read a book about a mean teacher, etc. this is not so crazy to imagine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP Here - I wanted to provide an update. We had a conference yesterday with the 3rd grade teacher, the kindergarten teacher, and the principal to discuss what happened. The teacher said that when my daughter didn't complete the assignment given, she asked why and my daughter said that she didn't know how to do it. The teacher said that didn't understand why my daughter wouldn't know how to do this work. She quizzed her on a couple of subtraction facts and my daughter couldn't answer them. The teacher didn't understand why my daughter isn't grasping what the teacher believes are foundational math concepts. So, she took my daughter down to a kindergarten class to see if that teacher could explain those concepts to her. The kindergarten teacher said that she asked my daughter to step aside to a quiet area of the room because she did not want my daughter to hear the two teachers discussing her. Once the teachers finished discussing what my daughter was having trouble with, the kindergarten teacher suggested that couldn't help at that very moment. The kindergarten teacher said she was not comfortable addressing this "on the spot" and in front of my daughter or the rest of her class. My daughter's 3rd grade teacher did apologize for the situation, but said that felt that she had no other choice. We ended the meeting with a plan to meet in December to assess if my daughter needs to be moved to another class that fits her learning style and make sure that her IEP covers support for some additional foundational math topics. Interestingly though, after the meeting, the kindergarten teacher walked with me to the parking lot and explained that she didn't like what happened. She said that she was very uncomfortable with the level of frustration the 3rd grade teacher displayed when she came to the kindergarten classroom. Which is why she asked my daughter to go to another part of the room. The kindergarten teacher also offered to spend some time after school twice a week to help my daughter catch up. We are beyond thankful for this kindergarten teacher.

Sorry this is such a long post, but thank everyone for your pointers and suggestions. They came in handy and I think we'll be on a good path going forward.

What school is this that the teacher walked you to the car and is offering to tutor your child one on one, which is not allowed? It sounds like BS, sorry.

Where is this not allowed? My child's teacher has helped her 2x week before school.

[Anonymous]

OP after working for many years in an elementary school I absolutely believe everything you said. Please ignore those who don't believe you, I knew a lot of parents who did not believe it when their kids or even someone else told them about bad things teachers did. I think most people just don't want to believe things like this could happen because that means it might be happening to their kid. It's not a lot of teachers who would do these things but it should be literally zero. You did the right thing by getting to the bottom of it.

[Anonymous]

I would go to the school directly and address this issue starting with finding out the teacher's side of the story. If you don't like the answer, file formal complaint against that teacher and demand child be moved to different class asap.

[Anonymous]

This troll thread made it to 9 pages? People are so gullible…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP Here - I wanted to provide an update. We had a conference yesterday with the 3rd grade teacher, the kindergarten teacher, and the principal to discuss what happened. The teacher said that when my daughter didn't complete the assignment given, she asked why and my daughter said that she didn't know how to do it. The teacher said that didn't understand why my daughter wouldn't know how to do this work. She quizzed her on a couple of subtraction facts and my daughter couldn't answer them. The teacher didn't understand why my daughter isn't grasping what the teacher believes are foundational math concepts. So, she took my daughter down to a kindergarten class to see if that teacher could explain those concepts to her. The kindergarten teacher said that she asked my daughter to step aside to a quiet area of the room because she did not want my daughter to hear the two teachers discussing her. Once the teachers finished discussing what my daughter was having trouble with, the kindergarten teacher suggested that couldn't help at that very moment. The kindergarten teacher said she was not comfortable addressing this "on the spot" and in front of my daughter or the rest of her class. My daughter's 3rd grade teacher did apologize for the situation, but said that felt that she had no other choice. We ended the meeting with a plan to meet in December to assess if my daughter needs to be moved to another class that fits her learning style and make sure that her IEP covers support for some additional foundational math topics. Interestingly though, after the meeting, the kindergarten teacher walked with me to the parking lot and explained that she didn't like what happened. She said that she was very uncomfortable with the level of frustration the 3rd grade teacher displayed when she came to the kindergarten classroom. Which is why she asked my daughter to go to another part of the room. The kindergarten teacher also offered to spend some time after school twice a week to help my daughter catch up. We are beyond thankful for this kindergarten teacher.

Sorry this is such a long post, but thank everyone for your pointers and suggestions. They came in handy and I think we'll be on a good path going forward.

What school is this that the teacher walked you to the car and is offering to tutor your child one on one, which is not allowed? It sounds like BS, sorry.

Where is this not allowed? My child's teacher has helped her 2x week before school.

That’s a teacher going above and beyond her obligations to your daughter and to the school. I hope you are deeply appreciative and let her know that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This troll thread made it to 9 pages? People are so gullible…

I do not believe this is a troll and I am pretty suspicious of lots of possibly troll posts and don't hesitate to report them.

Even if it was totally made up though this kind of thing definitely happens and people need to know the right thing to do to support their kid. If you think stuff like this cannot happen then you are very gullible. I've witnessed worse and I worked in a top school district.