Teacher Embarrasses 3rd Grader

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:100 I can see this happening- teacher with over 20 years experience.

My question to OP is what do you want ? Do you want to punish the teacher? Or do you want to help them understand the impact that this had on your daughter, and what an important figure the teacher is in your daughter’s daily life? This person has a significant impact on your daughter’s day to day! I hope you can help them understand that this action really hurt your daughter and you want to repair the relationship. That goes two ways- can you forgive this teacher for this terrible decision? and work with them for your daughters future success?

Not OP, but a teacher with this little emotional intelligence and empathy should not be working with children. She should be fired.

But of course public school teachers are virtually never fired, which is why there is a problem with a minority of teachers who do in fact have this little emotional intelligence and empathy. And I think they actually like working with children, who have so little power and thus cannot challenge them on their obvious unsuitability for the profession. Teachers are NOT universally great and caring. Some are horrible. But unions protect them just the same as the great ones.

Signed,
Someone who had a teacher like this when I was a kid, and whose kid has had a teacher like this as well

[Anonymous]

Sure, it could have happened. Some teachers have very little empathy. It’s unusual, but not rare enough for teachers to shame students. I work in a school as a specialist and have heard a lot, including a teacher loudly berate a second grader who has a IEP for fine motor difficulties for not tying their shoes. Kids remember the stuff that hurts. The OP should ask for more details from the school and stay calm, but if that happened to my kid, I would take the same approach as the elementary principal who posted above. I’d want them to apologize to my child, and then I’d want them moved to a new class so they could learn from a teacher who is able to handle students with learning challenges without publicly shaming them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sure, it could have happened. Some teachers have very little empathy. It’s unusual, but not rare enough for teachers to shame students. I work in a school as a specialist and have heard a lot, including a teacher loudly berate a second grader who has a IEP for fine motor difficulties for not tying their shoes. Kids remember the stuff that hurts. The OP should ask for more details from the school and stay calm, but if that happened to my kid, I would take the same approach as the elementary principal who posted above. I’d want them to apologize to my child, and then I’d want them moved to a new class so they could learn from a teacher who is able to handle students with learning challenges without publicly shaming them.

This is beyond saying a shaming comment to a student, which I could believe. The walking a kid down and interrupting another teacher, in a totally separate class, that has nothing at all to do with your student, just to make more a joke if it isn’t believable. No teacher, even bad ones, would do this. That is weird and psycho

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - While the situation may seem unbelievable, it actually happened. My daughter has no frame of reference to make up such a situation. And I don't know if the teacher left her class unsupervised. Thank you PPs with the advice about speaking with the principal and teacher and requesting an apology. I will definitely be pursuing those ideas.

Your daughter can't follow simple instructions but can remember with precise detail this fantastic story? Do you often get played by your daughter?

It wasn’t some complicated story. Teacher made a comment, dragged her to kindergarten, told the same comment. She didn’t say anything about kindergarten teacher’s reaction.

Teachers have said worse.

It’s the actions not the words. Curiously we still don’t know what the problematic assignment was.

[Anonymous]

If true, the kg teacher can easily corroborate.

[Anonymous]

Don’t believe it for a second. Kids never ever embellish!!!

[Anonymous]

Not knowing any of the people involved— or their propensity to embellish or not — I’d say a conference with the teachers, and possibly with the principal and both teachers would be my next step. The teacher could have been appallingly inappropriate, and, if so, that needs to be dealt with, including seriously considering a class change, if possible.

OTOH, I’ve known teachers to informally work as a team. Younger kids would be sent to higher grade classes to read with more advanced buddies. Kids who were having difficulty settling down might be sent to a Kindergarten class to “help out” or to have a break. This last intervention was often a good one, since the kids familiar with the K teachers knew them to be very kind and patient— with high expectations for good behavior. In the examples I’m recalling, it was a win-win, and not a punishment— although I can imagine an embarrassed student feeling publicly embarrassed.

tldr: Gather more information before deciding on a course of action.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not knowing any of the people involved— or their propensity to embellish or not — I’d say a conference with the teachers, and possibly with the principal and both teachers would be my next step. The teacher could have been appallingly inappropriate, and, if so, that needs to be dealt with, including seriously considering a class change, if possible.

OTOH, I’ve known teachers to informally work as a team. Younger kids would be sent to higher grade classes to read with more advanced buddies. Kids who were having difficulty settling down might be sent to a Kindergarten class to “help out” or to have a break. This last intervention was often a good one, since the kids familiar with the K teachers knew them to be very kind and patient— with high expectations for good behavior. In the examples I’m recalling, it was a win-win, and not a punishment— although I can imagine an embarrassed student feeling publicly embarrassed.

tldr: Gather more information before deciding on a course of action.

What the heck is this narrative you’ve fabricated. Sure older kids do mentor younger kids in very structured scenarios. You’re essentially rewriting what OPs child said. Not only that, others are jumping on the blame the victim bandwagon. Go TF away. Some teachers are dysfunctional. Some are power tripping bullies. My sister has been a special ed teacher for 30+ years. She has turned children’s lives around. She mostly deals with shitty parents. She’s also deals with very shitty teachers. OP, I believe your daughter. Do whatever it takes to get a public apology for your daughter in her classroom, in front of her peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not knowing any of the people involved— or their propensity to embellish or not — I’d say a conference with the teachers, and possibly with the principal and both teachers would be my next step. The teacher could have been appallingly inappropriate, and, if so, that needs to be dealt with, including seriously considering a class change, if possible.

OTOH, I’ve known teachers to informally work as a team. Younger kids would be sent to higher grade classes to read with more advanced buddies. Kids who were having difficulty settling down might be sent to a Kindergarten class to “help out” or to have a break. This last intervention was often a good one, since the kids familiar with the K teachers knew them to be very kind and patient— with high expectations for good behavior. In the examples I’m recalling, it was a win-win, and not a punishment— although I can imagine an embarrassed student feeling publicly embarrassed.

tldr: Gather more information before deciding on a course of action.

What the heck is this narrative you’ve fabricated. Sure older kids do mentor younger kids in very structured scenarios. You’re essentially rewriting what OPs child said. Not only that, others are jumping on the blame the victim bandwagon. Go TF away. Some teachers are dysfunctional. Some are power tripping bullies. My sister has been a special ed teacher for 30+ years. She has turned children’s lives around. She mostly deals with shitty parents. She’s also deals with very shitty teachers. OP, I believe your daughter. Do whatever it takes to get a public apology for your daughter in her classroom, in front of her peers.

DP.

Please. There is no “blame the victim” bandwagon. Find me ONE POST anywhere on this thread where that is occurring. All I see are people cautioning OP because children do embellish.

I can’t imagine you think the proper course of action is doing “whatever it takes” before actually figuring out what truly happened.

[Anonymous]

This is plainly a fireable offense, but I guess DCPS teachers can't be fired for anything, no bad how they are. Really shocking behavior by the teacher. This person should not be in a classroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, it could have happened. Some teachers have very little empathy. It’s unusual, but not rare enough for teachers to shame students. I work in a school as a specialist and have heard a lot, including a teacher loudly berate a second grader who has a IEP for fine motor difficulties for not tying their shoes. Kids remember the stuff that hurts. The OP should ask for more details from the school and stay calm, but if that happened to my kid, I would take the same approach as the elementary principal who posted above. I’d want them to apologize to my child, and then I’d want them moved to a new class so they could learn from a teacher who is able to handle students with learning challenges without publicly shaming them.

This is beyond saying a shaming comment to a student, which I could believe. The walking a kid down and interrupting another teacher, in a totally separate class, that has nothing at all to do with your student, just to make more a joke if it isn’t believable. No teacher, even bad ones, would do this. That is weird and psycho

You would be surprised. Most teachers are caring and empathetic and would never do this. But there are absolutely some bad apples especially in not so good, dysfunctional school districts where it’s hard to hire and retain good teachers. This is not a new thing but probably even worse now with teacher shortages even in good districts.

[Anonymous]

This sounds made up. A kindergarten and third grade classroom aren’t close enough to just quickly walk a kid down there. Try better in your trolling op.

[Anonymous]

Is there another parent whose child is in the class you can call and ask them to ask their child what happened?

[Anonymous]

I was reading this and as a parent of a kid with Level 1 autism, I would push for more support/IEP resource time. I would put that above asking for an apology from the teacher. Call an IEP meeting and use this as evidence that your daughter needs more support. Clearly, your daughter is struggling. If you get more IEP hours, it will probably last longer than just this year and overall help your daughter more.
I will say my child can always twist a story so he is the victim and doesn’t really see things all that clearly as part of his autism. It is one of the reasons he gets social skills work; to clearly state a narrative. Your daughter may not have that issue, but it can be part of ASD.

[Anonymous]

Omg. This is unconscionable! What a SH*T teacher. What teachers say stay with kids and they internalize it. How dare she send her to K! Meeting with principal and teacher. What a pathetic excuse for a human. Have her apologize to your daughter as well!