Private school for a "problem" boy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, many private schools have a lower tolerance for problem behavior than do public schools. But he may indeed benefit from smaller class sizes. Maybe a parochial school?

In theory maybe parochial could be good? But we're not really religious and he's not shy about expressing religious skepticism.

But the issue is we can't just stick him into a random private school that seems good in theory and then have them throw him out when he acts up. At least public schools can't do that. We need a school that feels like it can deal with a kid like this.

There are not many (if any) *protestant* parochial schools that offer an “outreach” model in the area (e.g., ones that welcome skeptics/non-believers and accept the challenge of conversion to faith by proxy). Those Christian schools in our area tend to be more of a “discipleship” model that are comprised of families of believers who have selected an educational environment for their kids that will strengthen and support their already-present faith foundation that reinforces the faith shared and practiced in their home. This is something that can’t be provided in the public schools for said families, so they are turning to these schools for that need.
Unfortunately, not only would it not be a good fit for your child/family, but it also would be a disruptive discomfort to other families. Most schools that fall under this category screen new families pretty heavily though, so he’d likely not be offered a spot once you disclose your lack of faith or church connection anyway.
There may be some Catholic privates in the area that may not require a specific profession of faith though. So that could be a good place to start?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are not many (if any) *protestant* parochial schools that offer an “outreach” model in the area (e.g., ones that welcome skeptics/non-believers and accept the challenge of conversion to faith by proxy). Those Christian schools in our area tend to be more of a “discipleship” model that are comprised of families of believers who have selected an educational environment for their kids that will strengthen and support their already-present faith foundation that reinforces the faith shared and practiced in their home. This is something that can’t be provided in the public schools for said families, so they are turning to these schools for that need.
Unfortunately, not only would it not be a good fit for your child/family, but it also would be a disruptive discomfort to other families. Most schools that fall under this category screen new families pretty heavily though, so he’d likely not be offered a spot once you disclose your lack of faith or church connection anyway.

There may be some Catholic privates in the area that may not require a specific profession of faith though. So that could be a good place to start?

As near as i can tell, all of the several local Episcopal schools are quite tolerant of non believers and people of different faiths. They still will require Episcopal religion classes, but do not require or expect religious conversion. Episcopal are a mainstream Protestant denomination.

I am not sure if any local Episcopal would be a good fit for OP's DC. In any case, this is a somewhat older thread.

[Anonymous]

Take a look at Apogee. Could be a great environment for a boy. They are a newer school but may be worth finding out if there are enough middle schoolers enrolled to make it fun for your DC. Haymarket though - could be FAR.

https://apogeenova.com/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Two year old thread, folks.

So frustrating when these old threads start up again like it is a current situation. Thank you, PP.

[Anonymous]

You should get him evaluated. But also, many schools straight up list whether or not they are willing to deal with mild or moderate differences and challenges. Look at websites and school ranking sites like Niche, Great Schools. And when you reach out and talk to admissions, you should be able to get a sense of how accommodating they are will challenging kids.

[Anonymous]

No private will keep a boy with behavior issues. They aren't equipped for that. Secular homeschooling might be better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, many private schools have a lower tolerance for problem behavior than do public schools. But he may indeed benefit from smaller class sizes. Maybe a parochial school?

In theory maybe parochial could be good? But we're not really religious and he's not shy about expressing religious skepticism.

But the issue is we can't just stick him into a random private school that seems good in theory and then have them throw him out when he acts up. At least public schools can't do that. We need a school that feels like it can deal with a kid like this.

No. I can think of 3 boys who were asked to leave our parochial. All the same grade.

[Anonymous]

What about Burke? Lots of bright kids with behavior issues there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are not many (if any) *protestant* parochial schools that offer an “outreach” model in the area (e.g., ones that welcome skeptics/non-believers and accept the challenge of conversion to faith by proxy). Those Christian schools in our area tend to be more of a “discipleship” model that are comprised of families of believers who have selected an educational environment for their kids that will strengthen and support their already-present faith foundation that reinforces the faith shared and practiced in their home. This is something that can’t be provided in the public schools for said families, so they are turning to these schools for that need.
Unfortunately, not only would it not be a good fit for your child/family, but it also would be a disruptive discomfort to other families. Most schools that fall under this category screen new families pretty heavily though, so he’d likely not be offered a spot once you disclose your lack of faith or church connection anyway.

There may be some Catholic privates in the area that may not require a specific profession of faith though. So that could be a good place to start?

As near as i can tell, all of the several local Episcopal schools are quite tolerant of non believers and people of different faiths. They still will require Episcopal religion classes, but do not require or expect religious conversion. Episcopal are a mainstream Protestant denomination.

I am not sure if any local Episcopal would be a good fit for OP's DC. In any case, this is a somewhat older thread.

Technically, Episcopalians are Protestants, but that’s not what a school means if it says Protestant. If it’s Catholic or Episcopalian, it will use those terms. If it (or the parents) use “Protestant” they mean evangelical Christian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He needs a neuropsych and one that specializes in more help.

What’s a good one?

[Anonymous]

Any school that will accept him will have other “problem” kids with even worse behaviors/habits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our son is starting public middle school and has repeated disciplinary issues such as getting into fights, including disrupting class by fighting with or confronting other students he feels have disrespected him. He has low frustration tolerance, an explosive temper, and is generally unmotivated academically. At the same time he is sociable, likable when he's not angry, clever verbally, and I know from working with him and from his tests that he has decent academic capacity -- he can at least keep up with grade level and exceed it in some areas if he was better motivated.

There is obviously a whole special needs/medicalization discussion one could have here (and we've been having it) but I'm also concerned the current public school environment is just the wrong environment for him -- fairly large and often chaotic classes, and an academic curriculum that isn't motivating him (e.g. he hates clicking through computer / web site based exercises and theres a ton of that where we are). He's expressed to me that he finds school very stressful ("I can handle my emotions, but not at school). It's also very clear that he benefits from being with a mainstream peer group.

It used to be that there were some private schools that could handle "problem" boys like this. I'm not sure such a thing exists any longer. Are there any private schools out there that don't steer clear of intelligent kids with "behavior issues" but actually handle them well? I handle him every day at home and know it's possible.

Bullis

[Anonymous]

Send him to Catholic school. Your teachers will write decent letters because they want to get rid of him. This happens all the time.

[Anonymous]

I know this is a zombie thread, and would be interested in where OP ended up.

One trend I've seen in this thread, though, and honestly in other threads about kids with special needs, is parents who come in and say "Oh, yes, X mainstream private has kids like that."

While mainstream privates do have kids with learning differences or minor behavioral issues, it is almost always kids who have been at that school since the entry grades. So they didn't enter X mainstream private as a kid with aggression. They entered as a 3 year old with two older siblings at the school and *became* a child with aggression. Schools are FAR more tolerant of legacy families with one kid who needs support than they are of kids who come in with the needs already identified.

[Anonymous]

Field +100000