Is anyone giving in to ED because of anxiety?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Agreed! It's time to stop trying to control your kids and let them forge their way in life. First kid had 3 top choices (one being a large state school the other 2 being basically equivalent Jesuit universities, about 6-8K undergrads and small classes---we are not Catholic or religious). Only guidance I provided was pointing out how our ADHD/low EF/kid with anxiety might(okay--would most likely) struggle at a large university and why the smaller ones might be the better overall experience for them and I gave specific reasons. Also explained why I though paying $40K/year for a smaller private was worth more than paying $50-60K for OOS at large state U (kid had excellent merit at both privates)---but that we would pay for whatever choice they made, as money was in the 529. I personally thought that one smaller/private was a better choice (and it is a 6 hour drive vs a 4 hour plane ride)---but between those two I kept my mouth shut and let my kid pick. They picked the one 2K miles away and had the best experience---and is now employed 2K miles away and loving it. When things were difficult freshman year academically (because of the ADHD/low EF as expected in a pre-med attempt), boy was I glad kid had ultimately picked the school themselves---otherwise I would have never heard the end of "it's all your fault, you made me pick this school, if I was at X I'd be doing much better and be happier". In reality, it's not my experience---I got that 30+ years ago when I was in college and finding my path in life. Now it's my kid's time to find their path and they get to live with their choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

Here's the thing: if a school ranked 75 is a better fit for your kid, it has more value to them than Harvard for the same price. But I'm guessing you don't see that---you just see prestige and the value from that. The value comes from your kid attending, being successful and finding their path in life---for many kids #75 (or something like that) is worth more than Harvard/Yale/etc.
If you can afford Harvard, they you can afford any school and it sends your kid the wrong message IMO if you say you wont' pay. Because in reality, the "not worth it schools" do not cost $80K (and by not worth it I means something ranked below 300/400---or say Liberty U for many reasons other than academics)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

The parent is not the one attending and not the one doing any of the work.

That’s where all the utility comes from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

Here's the thing: if a school ranked 75 is a better fit for your kid, it has more value to them than Harvard for the same price. But I'm guessing you don't see that---you just see prestige and the value from that. The value comes from your kid attending, being successful and finding their path in life---for many kids #75 (or something like that) is worth more than Harvard/Yale/etc.
If you can afford Harvard, they you can afford any school and it sends your kid the wrong message IMO if you say you wont' pay. Because in reality, the "not worth it schools" do not cost $80K (and by not worth it I means something ranked below 300/400---or say Liberty U for many reasons other than academics)

You make a lot of noise and empty barrels rattle the most.

[Anonymous]

This is why you apply early to a rolling admission school with a high acceptance rate. To alleviate the anxiety. It is OK, everyone knows why you are doing it including the school. They have good numbers on how many kids will go 0 for whatever and so won’t be over enrolled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

Here's the thing: if a school ranked 75 is a better fit for your kid, it has more value to them than Harvard for the same price. But I'm guessing you don't see that---you just see prestige and the value from that. The value comes from your kid attending, being successful and finding their path in life---for many kids #75 (or something like that) is worth more than Harvard/Yale/etc.
If you can afford Harvard, they you can afford any school and it sends your kid the wrong message IMO if you say you wont' pay. Because in reality, the "not worth it schools" do not cost $80K (and by not worth it I means something ranked below 300/400---or say Liberty U for many reasons other than academics)

You make a lot of noise and empty barrels rattle the most.

No, this poster makes a lot of sense. The value of a school is dependent on the student. Not ever person makes life-altering decisions based solely on ROI.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

Here's the thing: if a school ranked 75 is a better fit for your kid, it has more value to them than Harvard for the same price. But I'm guessing you don't see that---you just see prestige and the value from that. The value comes from your kid attending, being successful and finding their path in life---for many kids #75 (or something like that) is worth more than Harvard/Yale/etc.
If you can afford Harvard, they you can afford any school and it sends your kid the wrong message IMO if you say you wont' pay. Because in reality, the "not worth it schools" do not cost $80K (and by not worth it I means something ranked below 300/400---or say Liberty U for many reasons other than academics)

You make a lot of noise and empty barrels rattle the most.

No, this poster makes a lot of sense. The value of a school is dependent on the student. Not ever person makes life-altering decisions based solely on ROI.

Stop sock-puppeting your own responses. It's obvious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is why you apply early to a rolling admission school with a high acceptance rate. To alleviate the anxiety. It is OK, everyone knows why you are doing it including the school.

+They have good numbers on how many kids will go 0 for whatever and so won’t be over enrolled.

We did this. Pitt. DS entered the fall
madness senior year with a Pitt acceptance under his belt. Helped a lot

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think there is a “dream school” or best fit among all colleges. How could a 18 year old know which school will be the best fit without personal experience with professors, roommates, class registration rules, class rigor, work load, career guidance , etc? In fact, I believe for any kid there are at least a dozen school would fit. If there is one you like, go ahead and ED.

There are definately "Best Fit" and yes your 17/18 yo can recognize that. My kid ED to their top choice (T10 school) that is my alma mater and yes the kid loved the school but ultimately I think where they actually ended up was their "best fit". I could tell that from the moment they first visited the school. Both visits I saw my kid light up with excitement, at a level I did not see at any other school---they just clicked with the professors they visited, the staff they talked to and the students who gave the tours. I could just see that my kid would fit in with the students we saw walking around campus on the tours.

Sure there were another 4-5 schools they would have been very happy at and done well at, but IMO my kid ended up at the place that is actually best for them. And meeting their group of 10+ friends at the end of freshman year confirmed that they are in the right place.

My kid applied to a SLAC on a whim and got in. They had no idea before they applied and now they are very happy there and doing very well. I believe they would be equally happy at at least a dozen other places. College is what you make of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^isnt doing.

Personally, I hate ED. The only time I can see it is if it was someone’s lifelong dream school.

Why do you "hate ED"? Whole point of ED is it should be your top choice or at the bare minimum one of your top choices, and definately a school you would be thrilled to attend.

It's okay if you don't have a single school that rises to the top, then you simply don't ED anywhere, like many people

ED is repugnant because it’s a tool for schools to retain wealthy students. Other very worthy students are cut out from the process entirely.

You do realize that full pay students are to some extent subsidizing the partial and no-pay students, don’t you? Each year at most SLACs the Boards approve budgets that require a set amount of revenue from tuition in each class. The amount is usually less than simply a multiple of the published tuition rate times the number of expected new students. If everyone got a discount, obviously, it would be harder to meet the budget. So full pays are necessary if the school is going to have a significant number of economically disadvantaged students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

Here's the thing: if a school ranked 75 is a better fit for your kid, it has more value to them than Harvard for the same price. But I'm guessing you don't see that---you just see prestige and the value from that. The value comes from your kid attending, being successful and finding their path in life---for many kids #75 (or something like that) is worth more than Harvard/Yale/etc.
If you can afford Harvard, they you can afford any school and it sends your kid the wrong message IMO if you say you wont' pay. Because in reality, the "not worth it schools" do not cost $80K (and by not worth it I means something ranked below 300/400---or say Liberty U for many reasons other than academics)

You make a lot of noise and empty barrels rattle the most.

No, this poster makes a lot of sense. The value of a school is dependent on the student. Not ever person makes life-altering decisions based solely on ROI.

Stop sock-puppeting your own responses. It's obvious.

Sorry to break it to you, but you there's more than one of us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^isnt doing.

Personally, I hate ED. The only time I can see it is if it was someone’s lifelong dream school.

Why do you "hate ED"? Whole point of ED is it should be your top choice or at the bare minimum one of your top choices, and definately a school you would be thrilled to attend.

It's okay if you don't have a single school that rises to the top, then you simply don't ED anywhere, like many people

ED is repugnant because it’s a tool for schools to retain wealthy students. Other very worthy students are cut out from the process entirely.

You do realize that full pay students are to some extent subsidizing the partial and no-pay students, don’t you? Each year at most SLACs the Boards approve budgets that require a set amount of revenue from tuition in each class. The amount is usually less than simply a multiple of the published tuition rate times the number of expected new students. If everyone got a discount, obviously, it would be harder to meet the budget. So full pays are necessary if the school is going to have a significant number of economically disadvantaged students.

Oh please. Colleges don’t have to charge $85,000 per year. They don’t NEED to build multi-million dollar gyms and student centers, fancy dorms and so on.

While yes I DO know that full-pay students subsidize scholarship students, I also know that the colleges engage in dishonest tactics. So let’s be real.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

Here's the thing: if a school ranked 75 is a better fit for your kid, it has more value to them than Harvard for the same price. But I'm guessing you don't see that---you just see prestige and the value from that. The value comes from your kid attending, being successful and finding their path in life---for many kids #75 (or something like that) is worth more than Harvard/Yale/etc.
If you can afford Harvard, they you can afford any school and it sends your kid the wrong message IMO if you say you wont' pay. Because in reality, the "not worth it schools" do not cost $80K (and by not worth it I means something ranked below 300/400---or say Liberty U for many reasons other than academics)

You make a lot of noise and empty barrels rattle the most.

No, this poster makes a lot of sense. The value of a school is dependent on the student. Not ever person makes life-altering decisions based solely on ROI.

Stop sock-puppeting your own responses. It's obvious.

NP. No it isn't. Stop scolding. You don't know anything. Do you scold like this in real life? If not, why do you do it here? Think carefully about your response

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^isnt doing.

Personally, I hate ED. The only time I can see it is if it was someone’s lifelong dream school.

Why do you "hate ED"? Whole point of ED is it should be your top choice or at the bare minimum one of your top choices, and definately a school you would be thrilled to attend.

It's okay if you don't have a single school that rises to the top, then you simply don't ED anywhere, like many people

ED is repugnant because it’s a tool for schools to retain wealthy students. Other very worthy students are cut out from the process entirely.

You do realize that full pay students are to some extent subsidizing the partial and no-pay students, don’t you? Each year at most SLACs the Boards approve budgets that require a set amount of revenue from tuition in each class. The amount is usually less than simply a multiple of the published tuition rate times the number of expected new students. If everyone got a discount, obviously, it would be harder to meet the budget. So full pays are necessary if the school is going to have a significant number of economically disadvantaged students.

This is a very ignorant, knee-jerk response. I urge everyone to read up for 30 minutes on ED before posting myths you've heard. You have no idea what you are talking about and you inappropriately influence naive parents here. At a minimum, please provide a cite. To parents who are new to this - read and educate yourself. ED can be a winner for your family but if you are counting on financial aid you need to submit the FAFSA or CSS first before your kid applies ED. Call the financial aid office of the schools you are interested in and ask (ask for someone competent, not a student answering the phone). Read on College Confidential and Reddit. HIre a private counselor if you must. But learn before listening to people like this

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Anonymous wrote:If you're a really good student, college admissions is very confusing these days.

For below top 50, it's pretty easy. Submit a test score if you want. Your 4.0 is good enough. A couple of ECs. No one cares about your race. Extra bonus if you can get a teacher rec that says something nice. Easy peasy. Get some merit

For top - it used to be 20, but US News made things weird - let's say 40. It's the apocalypse out there.

Be extremely strategic with the ED card. It makes no difference at MIT. To their benefit. But it also doesn't make a difference at Harvard. To their discredit. That's where they get the Jared Kushners of the world.

Always look at the data. Who are they taking and why and when.

It's game theory. Alway tell your kid it's nothing personal. It's a game. Play it as such. The ED thing is a thing. It's a tool. But it should only be used at schools the kid really, really wants to go to.

OP here. That’s basically it. This is a top 30 LAC. If it was an Ivy, I’d have no issue spending the money. But it’s not. We specifically looked at it because they do seem to give good merit to a lot of students—especially considering their ranking. But I know we’re giving up leverage.

I think we’re going to just do it.

“Well I’m gonna nickel and dime a school my child actually likes and would succeed at but no worries I’ll happily pay $100k a year for a school that has a 5% accept rate as long as it’s BROWN or DARTMOUTH” is wild.

+1

Either you can "afford $80k/year" or you cannot. If it's a major stretch, then you probably shouldn't be doing it for Brown or Dartmouth either....prestige is really not worth it.

I suppose the only time I'd say no to a school is if my kid was picking somewhere that the education is truly subpar---as in I'd like to pay $80K/year to attend a school ranked #456. But that won't happen because schools ranked like that are not charging $80K+/year.
But if my kid really felt their "best fit" was our state school with avg SAT of 1080 and gpa of 3.3 then I'd let them go there

Your kids definitely hear you when you tell them you will pay infinite dollars for YOUR choice and will pay very little for THEIR choice even though you have the same resources for both.

Two colleges may have the same price tag but not the same value. I think you need to factor that in.

Here's the thing: if a school ranked 75 is a better fit for your kid, it has more value to them than Harvard for the same price. But I'm guessing you don't see that---you just see prestige and the value from that. The value comes from your kid attending, being successful and finding their path in life---for many kids #75 (or something like that) is worth more than Harvard/Yale/etc.
If you can afford Harvard, they you can afford any school and it sends your kid the wrong message IMO if you say you wont' pay. Because in reality, the "not worth it schools" do not cost $80K (and by not worth it I means something ranked below 300/400---or say Liberty U for many reasons other than academics)

You make a lot of noise and empty barrels rattle the most.

No, this poster makes a lot of sense. The value of a school is dependent on the student. Not ever person makes life-altering decisions based solely on ROI.

Stop sock-puppeting your own responses. It's obvious.

NP. No it isn't. Stop scolding. You don't know anything. Do you scold like this in real life? If not, why do you do it here? Think carefully about your response

Telling someone to stop sock puppeting is not "scolding". Get a life and some perspective you sad human.