any other jews get a little weirded out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First, want to include that I am Jewish, born and raised.

OP's post is the perfect example of "damned-if-you-do / damned-if-you-don't" Your friends, non-Jewish or Jewish, took the time to express good wishes to you. If you are questioning their motives than perhaps you should also question your definition of friendship.

OP, from your explanation it looks like your non-Jewish friends even took the time to research and learn the most proper ways to express their good wishes for the high holy days. If you ask me, that is wonderful and appreciated.

As a non-jew friend of lots of jews, I agree you can feel like there's no right thing you can do. I probably wouldn't do what your friend is doing though. I wonder if she is attracted to a Jewish man and hoping for a relationship with him by showing she's aware of Jewish holidays and culture? Women angling for a relationship can do some goofy stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, want to include that I am Jewish, born and raised.

OP's post is the perfect example of "damned-if-you-do / damned-if-you-don't" Your friends, non-Jewish or Jewish, took the time to express good wishes to you. If you are questioning their motives than perhaps you should also question your definition of friendship.

OP, from your explanation it looks like your non-Jewish friends even took the time to research and learn the most proper ways to express their good wishes for the high holy days. If you ask me, that is wonderful and appreciated.

As a non-jew friend of lots of jews, I agree you can feel like there's no right thing you can do. I probably wouldn't do what your friend is doing though. I wonder if she is attracted to a Jewish man and hoping for a relationship with him by showing she's aware of Jewish holidays and culture? Women angling for a relationship can do some goofy stuff.

Wut

[Anonymous]

I’m not a Jew but this thread has saddened me. I did not send any good wishes for Rosh Hashanah to any of my Jewish friend because I would never want to offend them.
Shame on you OP.

[Anonymous]

OP’s thread complaining that nobody acknowledges her holidays but she’s forced, absolutely forced, to acknowledge others’ holidays in 3…2…1….

OP doesn’t represent all Jews. Some people just like to be constantly offended.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP’s thread complaining that nobody acknowledges her holidays but she’s forced, absolutely forced, to acknowledge others’ holidays in 3…2…1….

OP doesn’t represent all Jews. Some people just like to be constantly offended.

Right. It's not religion related. It's a personality thing

[Anonymous]

OP, I think it’s weird. To everyone flaming OP, I don’t think she’s saying it’s weird for friends to personally wish her a happy holiday or send a card — that’s super nice. It’s social media/the performative aspect that makes things feel icky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I always feel so included in Jewish holidays by friends. I don't have social media (and hope to stay off forever) but I could see myself posting a pic or info to share since it's a nice time I'd want to share.

You are on social media right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think it’s weird. To everyone flaming OP, I don’t think she’s saying it’s weird for friends to personally wish her a happy holiday or send a card — that’s super nice. It’s social media/the performative aspect that makes things feel icky.

Sorry but people are allowed to send good messages (would you rather they quote Abbas or read from Mein Kampf?).
OP sounds like a pretty unhappy person to begin with so she could some good vibes.

[Anonymous]

As a Jew, I am pleased when any non-Jew acknowledges a Jewish holiday, tries to be inclusive, tells me they have a Jewish friend, etc. Even if they miss the mark, if their intentions are good, that is all I care about.

For thousands of years Jews have been persecuted, have had to hide their identity or outright convert

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not a Jew but this thread has saddened me. I did not send any good wishes for Rosh Hashanah to any of my Jewish friend because I would never want to offend them.
Shame on you OP.

haha oh see this is what i mean about non-jews making everything about them, though - even their own behavior on jewish holidays. it's alllll about you, pp.

grow up. if you want to wish your friends a happy rosh hashanah, then do so. if suddenly you feel that you can't do that anymore, why not do some self-reflection on why you feel differently now than you used to. why not have a conversation with your friends - and say you read this thread, and it made you self-conscious, and now you're not sure if it's appropriate to put up a fb post telling all the christians when the jewish holidays are and what to say to your jewish friends during them. maybe they'll tell you to go for it! maybe they do sincerely love it! maybe you will learn something about how they interpret these sorts of statement, and it's not what you expect.

shame on me, lol. you people!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think it’s weird. To everyone flaming OP, I don’t think she’s saying it’s weird for friends to personally wish her a happy holiday or send a card — that’s super nice. It’s social media/the performative aspect that makes things feel icky.

this is op - and yes, thank you. it's also christians deciding to educate others about holidays they don't actually have any connection to. it feels weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew, I am pleased when any non-Jew acknowledges a Jewish holiday, tries to be inclusive, tells me they have a Jewish friend, etc. Even if they miss the mark, if their intentions are good, that is all I care about.

For thousands of years Jews have been persecuted, have had to hide their identity or outright convert

yeah, i guess at least thank gd they aren't rounding us up and putting us in camps - just being sort of awkward on social media instead. dayenu!

also, i would like to note that i did not say in my original post that this is clearly a GRAVE offense and all jews agree. i asked if anyone felt this way. some people. said yes, others said no - two jews, three opinions, as someone else said. and of course the Offended Christians upset that anyone might not fully enjoy whatever the heck they are doing.

[Anonymous]

Or been killed. We now live in a country where we are free to practice and anyone who is accepting of that is a-okay in my book.

I have a Christian high school classmate who sends me a private FB messanger text every year wishing me a happy Rosh Hashanah, Chanukah, and Passover. She was always a sweet girl, and we were in a club together but were not really friends. Although it is not expected or necessary (much closer friends of mine do not do this), I know she is being kind by sending me those messages. I always give her a kind response in return. Who knows if she will be the next person to stand up to her school board when they try to schedule homecoming on Yom Kippur?

I've had people ask me about my Jewish church (I live in the South) and have had several say, "Oh I had a Jewish friend back in college." They are trying to relate to me and possibly learn more about me, and again, I take it in the spirit in which it was given.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Or been killed. We now live in a country where we are free to practice and anyone who is accepting of that is a-okay in my book.

I have a Christian high school classmate who sends me a private FB messanger text every year wishing me a happy Rosh Hashanah, Chanukah, and Passover. She was always a sweet girl, and we were in a club together but were not really friends. Although it is not expected or necessary (much closer friends of mine do not do this), I know she is being kind by sending me those messages. I always give her a kind response in return. Who knows if she will be the next person to stand up to her school board when they try to schedule homecoming on Yom Kippur?

I've had people ask me about my Jewish church (I live in the South) and have had several say, "Oh I had a Jewish friend back in college." They are trying to relate to me and possibly learn more about me, and again, I take it in the spirit in which it was given.

look, the personal message is fine - i also have acquaintances who send messages for birthdays and holidays, but we don't communicate other times. those messages are copy/paste and easy enough to reply "thanks" to - it's fine. people who truly don't know anyone jewish - i give them some more understanding. i used to live in a place where i really was the first jewish person many people had met - it was a very "you people killed jesus" sort of place. there, sure, any acknowledgement, curiosity, or understanding, was terrific.

but i think we can have higher expectations for many other people. people living in dc, have met jews. being jewish is not some exotic new thing to people in dc. i don't think that we should have to think: at least they didn't kill us. none of the "is this weird" people are choosing between an awkward holiday message and concentration camps, i don't think - and i hate that we have to think about it in these terms.

also, i would just like to add again - i do not find these messages anti-semitic. they aren't hostile. obviously they are well-intentioned. they're just a little weird! that's it! things aren't either the holocaust or THE BEST. sometimes something isn't the holocaust, and is also just a little strange! and also we don't all have to agree!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not a Jew but this thread has saddened me. I did not send any good wishes for Rosh Hashanah to any of my Jewish friend because I would never want to offend them.
Shame on you OP.

haha oh see this is what i mean about non-jews making everything about them, though - even their own behavior on jewish holidays. it's alllll about you, pp.

grow up. if you want to wish your friends a happy rosh hashanah, then do so. if suddenly you feel that you can't do that anymore, why not do some self-reflection on why you feel differently now than you used to. why not have a conversation with your friends - and say you read this thread, and it made you self-conscious, and now you're not sure if it's appropriate to put up a fb post telling all the christians when the jewish holidays are and what to say to your jewish friends during them. maybe they'll tell you to go for it! maybe they do sincerely love it! maybe you will learn something about how they interpret these sorts of statement, and it's not what you expect.

shame on me, lol. you people!

dp and wtf. You tell PP you're weirded out by certain expressions of holiday wishes. PP says, OK, I'll stop doing it because I don't want to offend and I'm not sure where the line is. And then you storm on to accuse PP of being immature and making everything about her. And you tell her to ask her jewish friends and basically ignore all your crap anyway.

You are a piece of work. Enjoy wallowing in feeling offended and self-righteous.