Roomie wants to discuss decorating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. Giving control freak vibes, privately. To your DD, try to be enrhusiastic and see this as an opportunity for both self expression and get to know roomate better before school starts.

This is not control freak vibes. Super common with girls. You’re reading too much into it and just looking for problems.

+1
"Coordinating" could simply mean coordinating the colors of whatever each girl chooses to buy. My daughter and her roommate sort of loosely did this - similar colors in their bedding, but that was pretty much it. They each discussed the posters they would bring and divvied up things like window fans, rug, etc. OP sounds extremely overdramatic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t spend a lot on decor before your kid even meets their roommate. It may not work out. Lots of kids change dorm rooms.

Also, just take the bare minimum of stuff. Those rooms are tiny!

My HS DD is currently doing a summer residential program at a college and it’s been eye opening. So much stuff is just unnecessary. Be a minimalist.

So this is info you gleaned from a HS summer program? Changing roommates has actually been very difficult in the schools my kids attended.
IMO it really depends on the kid. One of mine could’ve cared less. Never decorated a room and going into the third year. Another felt the decor made it feel more like home. If that helps you through freshman year, go for it. OPs job is to give a budget and stay out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. Giving control freak vibes, privately. To your DD, try to be enrhusiastic and see this as an opportunity for both self expression and get to know roomate better before school starts.

This is not control freak vibes. Super common with girls. You’re reading too much into it and just looking for problems.

Not PP but trying to make a kid you never met decorate their first away-from-home living space in the way you want is pretty controlling. They should each just choose what works for them and f-ing adapt.

You sound like a real peach.

Because I think some random teen shouldn’t dictate how their roommate decorates their half of the room? Mmkay.

Um... no one is dictating anything. Having a basic conversation about who is bringing what is normal. You sound anything but.
DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Headboard is just another piece of unneeded crap.
Get a husband pillow and be done with it.
https://www.target.com/p/sherpa-bed-rest-pill...entials/-/A-82072745

+1000. Smartest poster in the bunch. This pillow with a few colorful smaller ones is quite sufficient.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t spend a lot on decor before your kid even meets their roommate. It may not work out. Lots of kids change dorm rooms.

Also, just take the bare minimum of stuff. Those rooms are tiny!

My HS DD is currently doing a summer residential program at a college and it’s been eye opening. So much stuff is just unnecessary. Be a minimalist.

+1. THIS

[Anonymous]

Some of you have weird feelings about headboards. Who knew something random like that that would set off such a reaction!?! I haven't posted at all in this thread. I am simply a mom marveling at how adamantly opposed some of you are to something that seems so normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm pp and reading more of thread -- OP is the one creating drama. It's funny that you're calling the roommate a "control freak," when you're acting like a control freak yourself.

Handle it however you want, without drama.

Exactly this. So weird to be offended by a simple question about the dorm room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My rising college sophomore is texting her apartment roommate right now about how to decorate their new place. Yes, it is a thing. I don't know why this is a problem for you, OP. Feeling a loss of control? Let your daughter dream and look forward to things!

+1
Same here. The girls are living in a townhome for sophomore year and are excited to decorate it. They're smart and looking at thrift stores and the school's YMCA for kitchen supplies, etc. Dollar Stores are good resources too. And of course, they all have summer jobs to fund any other decor they like. The OP sounds like an absolute pill, as do some of these other posters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My rising college sophomore is texting her apartment roommate right now about how to decorate their new place. Yes, it is a thing. I don't know why this is a problem for you, OP. Feeling a loss of control? Let your daughter dream and look forward to things!

Sure. And people have budgets. Many kids in my state school were either on scholarship or took out loans. You are also a dolt

Wow. Talk about dolts. You've never heard of thrift shops? Goodwill? Dollar Stores? Wal-Mart? Grow up.
DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of you have weird feelings about headboards. Who knew something random like that that would set off such a reaction!?! I haven't posted at all in this thread. I am simply a mom marveling at how adamantly opposed some of you are to something that seems so normal.

It isn’t the idea of “ headboards” per se. It is the idea of filling up a room with cheap plastic and junk that will be trashed en masse on move out day. My school said the biggest source of waste are those foam mattress toppers everyone is purchasing. Bad for the environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My rising college sophomore is texting her apartment roommate right now about how to decorate their new place. Yes, it is a thing. I don't know why this is a problem for you, OP. Feeling a loss of control? Let your daughter dream and look forward to things!

Sure. And people have budgets. Many kids in my state school were either on scholarship or took out loans. You are also a dolt

Even those people have to have bedding and coordinate a fridge if not provided. I don’t understand why people take things to the extreme. This poor roomate asked a simple question that half the girls do. I don’t understand why a response is such a big deal…I mean OPs kid is out of state and it’s such a hardship to respond? She must not have taken a phone with her.

The only person I sympathize with in this whole scenario is the room mate. Not a good sign when the most basic of questions is blown up in this way.

+100
This is the most normal of normal exchanges and the OP (and her daughter?) are treating it like the roommate insisted the daughter get a matching tattoo. Utterly laughable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the roommate from the south? I am, and judging from my Facebook feed, some southern moms and their daughters get very into having a coordinated room decor. It’s seems over the top to me personally but to each her own.

Has your daughter already shopped for her things?

It’s fine not to get a headboard. I would be pleasant and coordinate a but by let roommate know you are only planning on bringing x, y, and a. Maybe let the roommate take the lead on deciding colors if your daughter doesn’t care and doesn’t have her stuff yet.

Well all of the DMV is in the South..., but it is not just a southern thing. I've had one at UMD and one at Boston College. Both coordinated decorations. All of these dorm room decorations and furniture (like headboards) are super cheap now. It is not like when we were in school.

The DC area is not the South.

-Southerner

Of course it is.
DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of you have weird feelings about headboards. Who knew something random like that that would set off such a reaction!?! I haven't posted at all in this thread. I am simply a mom marveling at how adamantly opposed some of you are to something that seems so normal.

It isn’t the idea of “ headboards” per se. It is the idea of filling up a room with cheap plastic and junk that will be trashed en masse on move out day. My school said the biggest source of waste are those foam mattress toppers everyone is purchasing. Bad for the environment.

My senior is using her mattress topper for the fourth year in a row this year. I don’t see that as wasteful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to college in 1994 and my roommate and I coordinated. Not to the degree some girls do today, but we did talk about it before we purchased things. RIP Linens N Things

+1
I went in 1986 and my roommate and I bonded over colors. We didn't match comforters, but we did coordinate colors of bedding, rug, etc. It was fun and a good way to break the ice with her - via letters and phone calls of course (no internet)!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of you have weird feelings about headboards. Who knew something random like that that would set off such a reaction!?! I haven't posted at all in this thread. I am simply a mom marveling at how adamantly opposed some of you are to something that seems so normal.

It isn’t the idea of “ headboards” per se. It is the idea of filling up a room with cheap plastic and junk that will be trashed en masse on move out day. My school said the biggest source of waste are those foam mattress toppers everyone is purchasing. Bad for the environment.

So your kid sleeps on the provided, used mattress - with nothing else? No thanks.