Teacher fired, charged with rape at gilman

[Anonymous]

This can happen anywhere. This guy had no criminal background, I knew him, friendliest nicest man you’ll ever meet. We hire babysitters and house sitters from our kids schools all the time. The answer here is educate all parents and kids about being able to come to their parents and counselors about anything without being afraid or embarrassed. And to teach kids to advocate for themselves and not be afraid to speak out and speak up. You’re not going to stop pedophiles from getting jobs at schools, this guy had no criminal background at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This can happen anywhere. This guy had no criminal background, I knew him, friendliest nicest man you’ll ever meet. We hire babysitters and house sitters from our kids schools all the time. The answer here is educate all parents and kids about being able to come to their parents and counselors about anything without being afraid or embarrassed. And to teach kids to advocate for themselves and not be afraid to speak out and speak up. You’re not going to stop pedophiles from getting jobs at schools, this guy had no criminal background at all.

I don't think anyone is suggesting that the school's potential negligence came from not uncovering past criminal behaviors. It's the fact that the school has a DECADES LONG history of sexual abuse perpetrated by its teachers, they came out with this big apology in 2021 crying "never again!" and yet... it happened again. The coach who abused like 50 kids years ago did the same thing, giving rides and grooming the kids after school. Gilman absolutely could have prevented this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This can happen anywhere. This guy had no criminal background, I knew him, friendliest nicest man you’ll ever meet. We hire babysitters and house sitters from our kids schools all the time. The answer here is educate all parents and kids about being able to come to their parents and counselors about anything without being afraid or embarrassed. And to teach kids to advocate for themselves and not be afraid to speak out and speak up. You’re not going to stop pedophiles from getting jobs at schools, this guy had no criminal background at all.

No one should be allowed to hire teachers to spend one on one time with their kids out of school. It’s just good risk management.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This can happen anywhere. This guy had no criminal background, I knew him, friendliest nicest man you’ll ever meet. We hire babysitters and house sitters from our kids schools all the time. The answer here is educate all parents and kids about being able to come to their parents and counselors about anything without being afraid or embarrassed. And to teach kids to advocate for themselves and not be afraid to speak out and speak up. You’re not going to stop pedophiles from getting jobs at schools, this guy had no criminal background at all.

I don't think anyone is suggesting that the school's potential negligence came from not uncovering past criminal behaviors. It's the fact that the school has a DECADES LONG history of sexual abuse perpetrated by its teachers, they came out with this big apology in 2021 crying "never again!" and yet... it happened again. The coach who abused like 50 kids years ago did the same thing, giving rides and grooming the kids after school. Gilman absolutely could have prevented this.

I don’t think there is a decades long history, two prior issues in the past 70 years.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]the school is holding a virtual town hall tomorrow night to talk about the issue. sounds underwhelming. [/quote]

Really? I don't think so. What would you have them do? This way, the school can communicate directly and hear concerns from the whole school community. Not sure what makes this so underwhelming.[/quote]

Agree - I am glad they will be on a town hall with me this week and I expect them to tell me the steps they are taking etc. on this issue as it is a catastrophic institutional failure, considering they did a "deep dive" thorough investigation just a year or two ago ..
and dont give me the "it can happen anywhere" crap - [b]it is happening at Gilman over and over and over.[/b] [/quote]

+1 This is the issue. Yes, it can happen anywhere but when it happens repeatedly at the same place, it is an institutional problem. I hope Gilman parents get answers and learn how the school plans to keep their students safe. [/quote]

DW and I were appalled at having to submit questions ahead of time under the guise of logistical ease. It's a way for them to filter out the tough questions via their lawyers and soft ball more bs at us. [/quote]
Exactly. Their obvious priority is to cover their arsses, not protecting students from getting raped by a teacher they employed for 15 years.

[Anonymous]

Don't say "two prior issues" like it was two issues or events .. it was DECADES long .. kids were abused for decades. That is a systemic institutional failure. Now we have a "3rd" that also went on for years with multiple victims they are saying .. this is decades long history by definition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There have been anonymous allegations that administration knew about babysitting/driving, but no actual proof or any credible non-anonymous claims. That would be damning if it were true, but at this point, all we have are anonymous assertions.

He had been supplying the boys with alcohol. Anyone who believes no one on the school staff had a clue is naive, to say the least. He forced the boys to run naked in the park. He had showers with the boys.

And you believe that he was doing these things in the view of, and with the knowledge of, other staff members? Not that he had taken steps to conceal his actions? That seems… unlikely.

Look, when a successful bastion of privilege like Gilman has something awful like this happen, the schadenfreude is real and rampant. But the truth is that it could happen anywhere, and has, and will. If someone actually has knowledge that the school was aware of it before they reported him, of course, that’s culpable. But I haven’t heard anything but people saying that they “must have known”. No, abusers don’t abuse out in the open, and they take measures to conceal their actions. I will blame Gilman if it turns out that they verifiably didn’t know about it and didn’t protect students, or if their response is tepid and down plays the severity of what happens. Neither of these has happened (yet?)

How long will it take you to forbid school staff from scheduled out-of-school activities with the students? And texting?

He got the boys to drink alcohol, and then took nude photographs of them. This is how he blackmailed the boys into doing everything he wanted. And he threatened to expose the nude photographs if the boys told anyone about anything.

Again, how long will it take you to implement some effective safeguards??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There have been anonymous allegations that administration knew about babysitting/driving, but no actual proof or any credible non-anonymous claims. That would be damning if it were true, but at this point, all we have are anonymous assertions.

He had been supplying the boys with alcohol. Anyone who believes no one on the school staff had a clue is naive, to say the least. He forced the boys to run naked in the park. He had showers with the boys.

And you believe that he was doing these things in the view of, and with the knowledge of, other staff members? Not that he had taken steps to conceal his actions? That seems… unlikely.

Look, when a successful bastion of privilege like Gilman has something awful like this happen, the schadenfreude is real and rampant. But the truth is that it could happen anywhere, and has, and will. If someone actually has knowledge that the school was aware of it before they reported him, of course, that’s culpable. But I haven’t heard anything but people saying that they “must have known”. No, abusers don’t abuse out in the open, and they take measures to conceal their actions. I will blame Gilman if it turns out that they verifiably didn’t know about it and didn’t protect students, or if their response is tepid and down plays the severity of what happens. Neither of these has happened (yet?)

How long will it take you to forbid school staff from scheduled out-of-school activities with the students? And texting?

He got the boys to drink alcohol, and then took nude photographs of them. This is how he blackmailed the boys into doing everything he wanted. And he threatened to expose the nude photographs if the boys told anyone about anything.

Again, how long will it take you to implement some effective safeguards??

[phone]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This can happen anywhere. This guy had no criminal background, I knew him, friendliest nicest man you’ll ever meet. We hire babysitters and house sitters from our kids schools all the time. The answer here is educate all parents and kids about being able to come to their parents and counselors about anything without being afraid or embarrassed. And to teach kids to advocate for themselves and not be afraid to speak out and speak up. You’re not going to stop pedophiles from getting jobs at schools, this guy had no criminal background at all.

I don't think anyone is suggesting that the school's potential negligence came from not uncovering past criminal behaviors. It's the fact that the school has a DECADES LONG history of sexual abuse perpetrated by its teachers, they came out with this big apology in 2021 crying "never again!" and yet... it happened again. The coach who abused like 50 kids years ago did the same thing, giving rides and grooming the kids after school. Gilman absolutely could have prevented this.

Honestly I think private school lure in parents with the promise of close teacher-student relationships with highly invested teachers that truly care about their children’s academic and social well being. Also there are so many built in opportunities in private schools for teachers to be alone with students outside of school (sports, extracurricular activities, fields trips aboard, etc). Parents then put their guard down and perpetrators like this teacher have a red light to manipulate the kids and to groom them for abuse over time.

It must be especially hard for the students to come out and tell someone what happened to them when they are supposed to be part of such a ‘tight, close knit community’ like Gilman and other private schools sell themselves as.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This can happen anywhere. This guy had no criminal background, I knew him, friendliest nicest man you’ll ever meet. We hire babysitters and house sitters from our kids schools all the time. The answer here is educate all parents and kids about being able to come to their parents and counselors about anything without being afraid or embarrassed. And to teach kids to advocate for themselves and not be afraid to speak out and speak up. You’re not going to stop pedophiles from getting jobs at schools, this guy had no criminal background at all.

I don't think anyone is suggesting that the school's potential negligence came from not uncovering past criminal behaviors. It's the fact that the school has a DECADES LONG history of sexual abuse perpetrated by its teachers, they came out with this big apology in 2021 crying "never again!" and yet... it happened again. The coach who abused like 50 kids years ago did the same thing, giving rides and grooming the kids after school. Gilman absolutely could have prevented this.

Honestly I think private school lure in parents with the promise of close teacher-student relationships with highly invested teachers that truly care about their children’s academic and social well being. Also there are so many built in opportunities in private schools for teachers to be alone with students outside of school (sports, extracurricular activities, fields trips aboard, etc). Parents then put their guard down and perpetrators like this teacher have a red light to manipulate the kids and to groom them for abuse over time.

It must be especially hard for the students to come out and tell someone what happened to them when they are supposed to be part of such a ‘tight, close knit community’ like Gilman and other private schools sell themselves as.

100% true. Gilman parent.

[Anonymous]

To whom it may concern:
Please shut-up with the “it can happen anywhere” garbage. What has been happening at Gilman, happens only where school administration chooses to allow rumors of abuse/rape to go unreported to the police department. Schools have a LEGAL obligation to report POSSIBLE abuse of students. It’s NOT the school’s job to determine if a rumor has merit or not.

Gilman does not have trained investigators on its payroll. Gilman should have reported to police the FIRST rumor of their students getting alcohol from a teacher. They broke the law right there. Of course no one will be held accountable for their silence.

Who cares that the perpetrator was a former student, or that his father is well liked in the community? Apparently, administrators cared a lot about protecting the ongoing sexual abuse of its students. Someone (besides the rapist teacher) MUST be held accountable for this atrocity perpetrated on these young boys. Victims of sexual abuse typically need years and years of very high quality therapy. The police are begging other victims to please come forward. We all know, however, that most victims choose not to speak of their abuse. It’s just to painful and not worth the ordeal of going public with this sort of thing. May God give them strength. My heart breaks for what they endured.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To whom it may concern:
Please shut-up with the “it can happen anywhere” garbage. What has been happening at Gilman, happens only where school administration chooses to allow rumors of abuse/rape to go unreported to the police department. Schools have a LEGAL obligation to report POSSIBLE abuse of students. It’s NOT the school’s job to determine if a rumor has merit or not.

Gilman does not have trained investigators on its payroll. Gilman should have reported to police the FIRST rumor of their students getting alcohol from a teacher. They broke the law right there. Of course no one will be held accountable for their silence.

Who cares that the perpetrator was a former student, or that his father is well liked in the community? Apparently, administrators cared a lot about protecting the ongoing sexual abuse of its students. Someone (besides the rapist teacher) MUST be held accountable for this atrocity perpetrated on these young boys. Victims of sexual abuse typically need years and years of very high quality therapy. The police are begging other victims to please come forward. We all know, however, that most victims choose not to speak of their abuse. It’s just to painful and not worth the ordeal of going public with this sort of thing. May God give them strength. My heart breaks for what they endured.

Well said. So sad but so so true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To whom it may concern:
Please shut-up with the “it can happen anywhere” garbage. What has been happening at Gilman, happens only where school administration chooses to allow rumors of abuse/rape to go unreported to the police department. Schools have a LEGAL obligation to report POSSIBLE abuse of students. It’s NOT the school’s job to determine if a rumor has merit or not.

Gilman does not have trained investigators on its payroll. Gilman should have reported to police the FIRST rumor of their students getting alcohol from a teacher. They broke the law right there. Of course no one will be held accountable for their silence.

Who cares that the perpetrator was a former student, or that his father is well liked in the community? Apparently, administrators cared a lot about protecting the ongoing sexual abuse of its students. Someone (besides the rapist teacher) MUST be held accountable for this atrocity perpetrated on these young boys. Victims of sexual abuse typically need years and years of very high quality therapy. The police are begging other victims to please come forward. We all know, however, that most victims choose not to speak of their abuse. It’s just to painful and not worth the ordeal of going public with this sort of thing. May God give them strength. My heart breaks for what they endured.

There were not previous rumors of abuse/rape.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To whom it may concern:
Please shut-up with the “it can happen anywhere” garbage. What has been happening at Gilman, happens only where school administration chooses to allow rumors of abuse/rape to go unreported to the police department. Schools have a LEGAL obligation to report POSSIBLE abuse of students. It’s NOT the school’s job to determine if a rumor has merit or not.

Gilman does not have trained investigators on its payroll. Gilman should have reported to police the FIRST rumor of their students getting alcohol from a teacher. They broke the law right there. Of course no one will be held accountable for their silence.

Who cares that the perpetrator was a former student, or that his father is well liked in the community? Apparently, administrators cared a lot about protecting the ongoing sexual abuse of its students. Someone (besides the rapist teacher) MUST be held accountable for this atrocity perpetrated on these young boys. Victims of sexual abuse typically need years and years of very high quality therapy. The police are begging other victims to please come forward. We all know, however, that most victims choose not to speak of their abuse. It’s just to painful and not worth the ordeal of going public with this sort of thing. May God give them strength. My heart breaks for what they endured.

There were not previous rumors of abuse/rape.

What prompted Gilman to finally fire him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To whom it may concern:
Please shut-up with the “it can happen anywhere” garbage. What has been happening at Gilman, happens only where school administration chooses to allow rumors of abuse/rape to go unreported to the police department. Schools have a LEGAL obligation to report POSSIBLE abuse of students. It’s NOT the school’s job to determine if a rumor has merit or not.

Gilman does not have trained investigators on its payroll. Gilman should have reported to police the FIRST rumor of their students getting alcohol from a teacher. They broke the law right there. Of course no one will be held accountable for their silence.

Who cares that the perpetrator was a former student, or that his father is well liked in the community? Apparently, administrators cared a lot about protecting the ongoing sexual abuse of its students. Someone (besides the rapist teacher) MUST be held accountable for this atrocity perpetrated on these young boys. Victims of sexual abuse typically need years and years of very high quality therapy. The police are begging other victims to please come forward. We all know, however, that most victims choose not to speak of their abuse. It’s just to painful and not worth the ordeal of going public with this sort of thing. May God give them strength. My heart breaks for what they endured.

There were not previous rumors of abuse/rape.

That you know of - the point is the school may have known or suspected inappropriate conduct at the very least with the drinking and close relationships. Enough to put a stop to it.