Why do I find it annoying when childfree people say they are tired?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I roll by eyes internally for sure and nod.

I used to think I was tired too.

International travel? Night out? Big work project?

At the end of it, you can sleep sleep sleep and recover.

You can't fathom life with kids till you're in it.

Well. I knew before getting pregnant that pregnancy was not fun and that giving birth hurt like hell. I also knew that being a parent was no.bed of roses and that there were sacrifices. Too bad so many of you were so stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I roll by eyes internally for sure and nod.

I used to think I was tired too.

International travel? Night out? Big work project?

At the end of it, you can sleep sleep sleep and recover.

You can't fathom life with kids till you're in it.

Well. I knew before getting pregnant that pregnancy was not fun and that giving birth hurt like hell. I also knew that being a parent was no.bed of roses and that there were sacrifices. Too bad so many of you were so stupid.

You seem illiterate. No one said they assumed it was a "bed of roses."

It is just a different level of tiredness etc than being childfree. Not sure why ppl seem to be disagreeing?

[Anonymous]

Because you lack empathy and have a difficult time seeing anything beyond your own life. You can't imagine that someone else might have struggles that you don't have and that your struggles are worse than theirs.

I have twins and I could just as easily say that I find it annoying when parents of singletons say they are tired. They have it easy. They only had one infant, one mouth to feed, one baby to diaper. Try taking care of two infants who suffered from two separate digestive problems.

But I don't. I know parents of singletons that had it more difficult. Like my friend who had Lupus and struggled with aching and painful muscles while trying to care for her one and only baby. Or the friend who had chronic Crohn's disease and had to go to work, and had to stay up evenings to care for his two children when he was having stabbing abdominal pains because his wife was working nights because they needed two incomes, but couldn't afford childcare (he was a school teacher and she was a nurse who shifted to night shifts for the schedule and pay differential). I also know that single parents, single parents by choice and military spouses have had it much harder than I did because we had a partner to switch off with.

There are thousands of stories of people who may look like they have it easier, but I would never have wanted to switch lives with them and I'm grateful that I never had to cope with what they deal with on a daily basis.

[Anonymous]

Unless you were forced to have a child, stop complaining. You made a choice and choices have consequences. I have zero sympathy/empathy.

[Anonymous]

This too shall pass. Hang on. Someday you can sleep and have time to think and relax.

- happy empty nester

[Anonymous]

Ugh, people like you are so gross. Stop gatekeeping tiredness. You don’t get a medal or a cookie for being a parent.

-parent to multiple kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it really offensive when people use their kids as weapons in the martyr olympics. I can't really imagine how it feels to have a parent who communicates that they have it worse than everyone else because you exist.

Nailed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate when people without kids complain about the costs to board their pets when they travel. I wish I could board my kids for a few days or hire a neighbor to come and walk them a couple times a day while we go to Europe. Unfortunately, the answer for us is we just can't go to Europe unless we bring the kids.

If only there were a way you could have known this ahead of time before you had them. Oh, wait!

[Anonymous]

I see both sides of this. Working mom to a 2yo and a 5yo who are constantly sick from daycare/school. I do think people without kids have no idea of the grind it is to be getting insufficient/broken sleep for months or years at a time. And what a luxury it is to be able to sleep in on a weekend or have a day off to yourself. But I don't expect sympathy for something I chose, and I certainly wouldn't trade my kids for a few extra hours of sleep.

And also, people like me with neurotypical healthy children who are decent sleepers also have no idea how it is for people with chronically ill or severely disabled kids (or other family members, for that matter- I have a childfree coworker who is currently staying up all night with his severely disabled brother bc their regular caregiver has Covid and they haven't been able to find anyone to cover).

So be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP all the child free folks must be free right now and browsing DCUM based on these responses. By the way, I don’t say but yes, I cringe when I hear oh I’m soooooo tired or oh I haven’t had time for any self care and doing my nails lolz they’re ridiculous but I just nod smile and judge away. Same like with pet parents saying it’s the same like having kids.

Nope. I’m a parent. I have more kids than probably 95% of DCUM and I think both the OP and you are ridiculous and insecure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate when people without kids complain about the costs to board their pets when they travel. I wish I could board my kids for a few days or hire a neighbor to come and walk them a couple times a day while we go to Europe. Unfortunately, the answer for us is we just can't go to Europe unless we bring the kids.

If only there were a way you could have known this ahead of time before you had them. Oh, wait!

Are you one of those people who won't get up for pregnant women on the metro bc they "chose to get pregnant"? You can be kind to someone in a tough situation even if the situation is of their own making

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, I was just venting on a parenting forum. I thought other parents would say how tired they were to be woken up multiple times per night or how they have to get woken up to then wake up earlier than the kids to get ready for work.

And that’s fine wanting commiseration, so post that, instead of putting down other people’s problems and nominating yourself for the Suffering Olympics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I roll by eyes internally for sure and nod.

I used to think I was tired too.

International travel? Night out? Big work project?

At the end of it, you can sleep sleep sleep and recover.

You can't fathom life with kids till you're in it.

Well. I knew before getting pregnant that pregnancy was not fun and that giving birth hurt like hell. I also knew that being a parent was no.bed of roses and that there were sacrifices. Too bad so many of you were so stupid.

You seem illiterate. No one said they assumed it was a "bed of roses."

It is just a different level of tiredness etc than being childfree. Not sure why ppl seem to be disagreeing?

Except it isn’t, because the “child free” experience is not a monolith.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate when people without kids complain about the costs to board their pets when they travel. I wish I could board my kids for a few days or hire a neighbor to come and walk them a couple times a day while we go to Europe. Unfortunately, the answer for us is we just can't go to Europe unless we bring the kids.

If only there were a way you could have known this ahead of time before you had them. Oh, wait!

Are you one of those people who won't get up for pregnant women on the metro bc they "chose to get pregnant"? You can be kind to someone in a tough situation even if the situation is of their own making

Good advice for OP to take in regard to her ridiculous snark about bUt tHe cHiLdFrEe!

[Anonymous]

Because you are hyper focused on your own self and don't have much empathy for others.