Ali Wong divorcing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's vulgar.
It's embarrassing that so many Asians feel they need to grovel to talking graphically about sex, their sex life, mine their family issues, etc... just to be noticed in media.
She's like the loud-mouthy fat girl in high school.
-signed Asian

So, completely unfamiliar with comedy?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I keep coming back to this quote in the article:

As a result, the Always Be My Maybe star shared she became "more motivated to make my own money because I signed a document specifically outlining how much I couldn't depend on my husband,"

This is sad to me. I think especially after she became successful, the feeling that she believed in her husband but he didn’t believe in her would be increasingly hurtful. She tries to rationalize it so many ways and that’s what it comes down to: The person she married didn’t believe in her. I think there’s even part of Baby Covra where she says she used her TV money to pay off some of his debts? Ouch. That has to sting. I’m not surprised they’re getting divorced.

The "how much I couldn't depend on my husband" is very telling. Clearly there were issues before the wedding.

I think there may have been shame on her behalf, and possibly her family or origin, that his family made her sign a prenup, signalling that his family was better than hers. Better financially, in stature. She may have been perceived as a loser, a gold digger, “he or they didn’t believe in her”. She couldn’t depend on him to support her. They or he didnt seem to see that the marriage was long term. Money is an awkward thing in Asian cultures. A lot of pride around money. I am Asian, and I completely understand where she was coming from, the need to show him and his family that she was not a gold digger or loser. The anger, but also satisfaction in showing them they were wrong, when she ended up working a lot harder than him, laying their bills. That they did not have boys may have also been problematic. Grandsons would be more valued unfortunately.

Your comment reminded me of her 'jungle' versus 'fancy' Asian jokes.

Didn’t she pay off his student loans? They either aren’t that rich or extremely tight.

Both? Sounds like his parents didn't pay off that much-praised Harvard MBA. Neither did his job. His wife did.

So how rich could they possibly be?

It is really un-asian to not pay for your kids' school when you can afford it. Having your DIL to pay for it is totally losing face. Not sure what is going on with his family.

+1 Asian and I'm shocked. My parents are not rich but they are UMC and paid for it all.

You guys it wasn’t student loans. He got in over his head with a start up and lost 70K. His parents payed fir private schools for him and gave him every advantage.

Oh. Hmm. While they were married? And they have 4 & 6 year-old and were just married 8 years ago. That's a lot to handle.

Yes. And he never told her about the debt. She found out when they were buying a house.

You can't be serious. The guy has an MBA - he didn't think it would come out?! Why didn't he ask his wealthy parents for a holdover loan to clear it?

I actually think BECAUSE he has this MBA and is under the thumb of his parents might be part of his own hubris in thinking he could hide it from her and she would be none the wiser, because she may not be as fluent in these kinds of things as he is. If that's the case, I can see that being a major point of contempt for her.

Assuming she wouldn't know the nuance of buying a property is sexism on his party but even if she didn't its the lender's job to let you as a couple know what you qualify for. If they were trying to buy it together, a credit check would put a big red flag on his account from the get-go.

'Hey hunny, why does the lender say we only qualify for $725K because your DTI ratio is too high? You only have a 6-year-old toyota in your name..."

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I keep coming back to this quote in the article:

As a result, the Always Be My Maybe star shared she became "more motivated to make my own money because I signed a document specifically outlining how much I couldn't depend on my husband,"

This is sad to me. I think especially after she became successful, the feeling that she believed in her husband but he didn’t believe in her would be increasingly hurtful. She tries to rationalize it so many ways and that’s what it comes down to: The person she married didn’t believe in her. I think there’s even part of Baby Covra where she says she used her TV money to pay off some of his debts? Ouch. That has to sting. I’m not surprised they’re getting divorced.

The "how much I couldn't depend on my husband" is very telling. Clearly there were issues before the wedding.

I think there may have been shame on her behalf, and possibly her family or origin, that his family made her sign a prenup, signalling that his family was better than hers. Better financially, in stature. She may have been perceived as a loser, a gold digger, “he or they didn’t believe in her”. She couldn’t depend on him to support her. They or he didnt seem to see that the marriage was long term. Money is an awkward thing in Asian cultures. A lot of pride around money. I am Asian, and I completely understand where she was coming from, the need to show him and his family that she was not a gold digger or loser. The anger, but also satisfaction in showing them they were wrong, when she ended up working a lot harder than him, laying their bills. That they did not have boys may have also been problematic. Grandsons would be more valued unfortunately.

Your comment reminded me of her 'jungle' versus 'fancy' Asian jokes.

Didn’t she pay off his student loans? They either aren’t that rich or extremely tight.

Both? Sounds like his parents didn't pay off that much-praised Harvard MBA. Neither did his job. His wife did.

So how rich could they possibly be?

It is really un-asian to not pay for your kids' school when you can afford it. Having your DIL to pay for it is totally losing face. Not sure what is going on with his family.

+1 Asian and I'm shocked. My parents are not rich but they are UMC and paid for it all.

You guys it wasn’t student loans. He got in over his head with a start up and lost 70K. His parents payed fir private schools for him and gave him every advantage.

Oh. Hmm. While they were married? And they have 4 & 6 year-old and were just married 8 years ago. That's a lot to handle.

Yes. And he never told her about the debt. She found out when they were buying a house.

You can't be serious. The guy has an MBA - he didn't think it would come out?! Why didn't he ask his wealthy parents for a holdover loan to clear it?

I actually think BECAUSE he has this MBA and is under the thumb of his parents might be part of his own hubris in thinking he could hide it from her and she would be none the wiser, because she may not be as fluent in these kinds of things as he is. If that's the case, I can see that being a major point of contempt for her.

Assuming she wouldn't know the nuance of buying a property is sexism on his party but even if she didn't its the lender's job to let you as a couple know what you qualify for. If they were trying to buy it together, a credit check would put a big red flag on his account from the get-go.

'Hey hunny, why does the lender say we only qualify for $725K because your DTI ratio is too high? You only have a 6-year-old toyota in your name..."

I agree with everything you are saying, especially the bolded, but I'm not totally clear on the timeframe of when this happened. I think it was after they were already married, so it was "surprise" debt to her when they purchased a house but were already married and possibly when she was making more money. Hence, she paid off the bad debt but it might have been a red flag disillusioning moment for her this guy "better than her" didn't have his sh+t together as much as she thought.

I'm totally spitballing, feel free to disagree, but I can see someone resenting being put in that situation. Not a mega fan or anything, just thinking through why one might have this dynamic as we do on the internet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's vulgar.
It's embarrassing that so many Asians feel they need to grovel to talking graphically about sex, their sex life, mine their family issues, etc... just to be noticed in media.
She's like the loud-mouthy fat girl in high school.
-signed Asian

She’s a stand up comic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Her last standup was not funny. I’m sad for them.

Are you kidding? Its hilarious.

Watching this as a childfree person, I wonder why Ali would have kids and then complain about them? Like it's expected your life is going to change. I get the impression that she wanted kids more than the husband because she said in her previous special she didn't want to be lonely in her old age.

Just because you want something and get it doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to have a hard time or be challenged in life changing ways… also, you cannot always predict how children will affect a partnership (if you have kids with a partner). Sometimes, or a lot of the time, things get really really hard before you figure some stuff out.

Have you ever known anyone with a dog who has never had a complaint or challenge in regard to owning a dog?

To be honest, no. Everyone I know who has dogs loves their dogs and don't complain about the vet bills, boarding fees, pooping etc. I think kids are different because guess who consciously chose to conceive them? Their parents. And when the emotional (and financial!) return on investment doesn't pan out, it's a hard pill to swallow.

Lol! Seriously? I love my dog but not thrilled to walk her in crappy weather and vet bills are ridiculously expensive. My friends and I complain about how much work it is owning a dog, we love them but it is work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I keep coming back to this quote in the article:

As a result, the Always Be My Maybe star shared she became "more motivated to make my own money because I signed a document specifically outlining how much I couldn't depend on my husband,"

This is sad to me. I think especially after she became successful, the feeling that she believed in her husband but he didn’t believe in her would be increasingly hurtful. She tries to rationalize it so many ways and that’s what it comes down to: The person she married didn’t believe in her. I think there’s even part of Baby Covra where she says she used her TV money to pay off some of his debts? Ouch. That has to sting. I’m not surprised they’re getting divorced.

The "how much I couldn't depend on my husband" is very telling. Clearly there were issues before the wedding.

I think there may have been shame on her behalf, and possibly her family or origin, that his family made her sign a prenup, signalling that his family was better than hers. Better financially, in stature. She may have been perceived as a loser, a gold digger, “he or they didn’t believe in her”. She couldn’t depend on him to support her. They or he didnt seem to see that the marriage was long term. Money is an awkward thing in Asian cultures. A lot of pride around money. I am Asian, and I completely understand where she was coming from, the need to show him and his family that she was not a gold digger or loser. The anger, but also satisfaction in showing them they were wrong, when she ended up working a lot harder than him, laying their bills. That they did not have boys may have also been problematic. Grandsons would be more valued unfortunately.

Your comment reminded me of her 'jungle' versus 'fancy' Asian jokes.

Didn’t she pay off his student loans? They either aren’t that rich or extremely tight.

Both? Sounds like his parents didn't pay off that much-praised Harvard MBA. Neither did his job. His wife did.

So how rich could they possibly be?

It is really un-asian to not pay for your kids' school when you can afford it. Having your DIL to pay for it is totally losing face. Not sure what is going on with his family.

+1 Asian and I'm shocked. My parents are not rich but they are UMC and paid for it all.

You guys it wasn’t student loans. He got in over his head with a start up and lost 70K. His parents payed fir private schools for him and gave him every advantage.

Oh. Hmm. While they were married? And they have 4 & 6 year-old and were just married 8 years ago. That's a lot to handle.

Yes. And he never told her about the debt. She found out when they were buying a house.

The hiding it is HUGE.

Wow. This is horrible. What an idiot.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I married into a wealthy family, and they would never have asked me to sign a prenup.
It’s an awful way to start a life together.

Eh, I don’t know. It sounds like his money at time of marriage was really family money.

The thing is, family money is already protected in a divorce. The prenup had to be about HIS money. You don’t need a prenup to protect an inheritance—all you have to do is keep it in a separate account in your name only.

Again, not in CA.

Applies in CA too. The second the inheritance accounts mixes with anything of the spouse it becomes joint.

Sure but the standards for what it means to mix are ridiculously low. It doesn’t have to even mix into the same account. It can be kept separate but if used for family expenses, is presumed to be mixed. I do not think people on the east coast understand just how easy it is to grab pre marital or family assets in a divorce in California. It’s not like the east coast.

There is a reason the billionaire divorcing wives establish residency in California a year before filing for divorce.

While the standards.might be "low" they are also clear so if the family is concerned enough to require the prenup you'd think they would have the foresight to understand what mixed means.

They aren’t actually clear. You very, very clearly do not practice law in California.

It actually is. Maybe you just don't understand it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her last standup was not funny. I’m sad for them.

Are you kidding? Its hilarious.

Watching this as a childfree person, I wonder why Ali would have kids and then complain about them? Like it's expected your life is going to change. I get the impression that she wanted kids more than the husband because she said in her previous special she didn't want to be lonely in her old age.

Just because you want something and get it doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to have a hard time or be challenged in life changing ways… also, you cannot always predict how children will affect a partnership (if you have kids with a partner). Sometimes, or a lot of the time, things get really really hard before you figure some stuff out.

Have you ever known anyone with a dog who has never had a complaint or challenge in regard to owning a dog?

To be honest, no. Everyone I know who has dogs loves their dogs and don't complain about the vet bills, boarding fees, pooping etc. I think kids are different because guess who consciously chose to conceive them? Their parents. And when the emotional (and financial!) return on investment doesn't pan out, it's a hard pill to swallow.

That's hard to believe. My coworkers, friends, and neighbors always complain about the vet bills, arranging pet sitters, clean up, etc

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's vulgar.
It's embarrassing that so many Asians feel they need to grovel to talking graphically about sex, their sex life, mine their family issues, etc... just to be noticed in media.
She's like the loud-mouthy fat girl in high school.
-signed Asian

Why are you making this about race?

You sound like you see the world through that lense.

I would say the majority of female comics (thought not all) are like this. Certainly, MANY who are blonde and caucasian!

(Plus, your body shaming is not appropriate either.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her last standup was not funny. I’m sad for them.

Are you kidding? Its hilarious.

Watching this as a childfree person, I wonder why Ali would have kids and then complain about them? Like it's expected your life is going to change. I get the impression that she wanted kids more than the husband because she said in her previous special she didn't want to be lonely in her old age.

Just because you want something and get it doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to have a hard time or be challenged in life changing ways… also, you cannot always predict how children will affect a partnership (if you have kids with a partner). Sometimes, or a lot of the time, things get really really hard before you figure some stuff out.

Have you ever known anyone with a dog who has never had a complaint or challenge in regard to owning a dog?

To be honest, no. Everyone I know who has dogs loves their dogs and don't complain about the vet bills, boarding fees, pooping etc. I think kids are different because guess who consciously chose to conceive them? Their parents. And when the emotional (and financial!) return on investment doesn't pan out, it's a hard pill to swallow.

And your dogs won't find you on Netflix when they get older, complaining about what it feels like to be their owner.

[Anonymous]

It's important to remember that stand-up is a carefully crafted performance and not really representative of their actual marriage. Same thing when John Mulaney got divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's important to remember that stand-up is a carefully crafted performance and not really representative of their actual marriage. Same thing when John Mulaney got divorced.

Many stand-up comics use their personal experiences and its been clear from day one that Ali has been mining her deteriorating marriage for her material.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her last standup was not funny. I’m sad for them.

Are you kidding? Its hilarious.

Watching this as a childfree person, I wonder why Ali would have kids and then complain about them? Like it's expected your life is going to change. I get the impression that she wanted kids more than the husband because she said in her previous special she didn't want to be lonely in her old age.

Just because you want something and get it doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to have a hard time or be challenged in life changing ways… also, you cannot always predict how children will affect a partnership (if you have kids with a partner). Sometimes, or a lot of the time, things get really really hard before you figure some stuff out.

Have you ever known anyone with a dog who has never had a complaint or challenge in regard to owning a dog?

To be honest, no. Everyone I know who has dogs loves their dogs and don't complain about the vet bills, boarding fees, pooping etc. I think kids are different because guess who consciously chose to conceive them? Their parents. And when the emotional (and financial!) return on investment doesn't pan out, it's a hard pill to swallow.

That's hard to believe. My coworkers, friends, and neighbors always complain about the vet bills, arranging pet sitters, clean up, etc

First of all, no one told you to get a dog. You wanted one, you got one. So don't whine. Same thing I've warned my husband about. If you want a dog, you're going to be 100% responsible for it. I'm not picking up dog poo nor am I walking the dog. DH still hasn't gotten 'his dog' 😂

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her last standup was not funny. I’m sad for them.

Are you kidding? Its hilarious.

Watching this as a childfree person, I wonder why Ali would have kids and then complain about them? Like it's expected your life is going to change. I get the impression that she wanted kids more than the husband because she said in her previous special she didn't want to be lonely in her old age.

Just because you want something and get it doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to have a hard time or be challenged in life changing ways… also, you cannot always predict how children will affect a partnership (if you have kids with a partner). Sometimes, or a lot of the time, things get really really hard before you figure some stuff out.

Have you ever known anyone with a dog who has never had a complaint or challenge in regard to owning a dog?

To be honest, no. Everyone I know who has dogs loves their dogs and don't complain about the vet bills, boarding fees, pooping etc. I think kids are different because guess who consciously chose to conceive them? Their parents. And when the emotional (and financial!) return on investment doesn't pan out, it's a hard pill to swallow.

That's hard to believe. My coworkers, friends, and neighbors always complain about the vet bills, arranging pet sitters, clean up, etc

First of all, no one told you to get a dog. You wanted one, you got one. So don't whine. Same thing I've warned my husband about. If you want a dog, you're going to be 100% responsible for it. I'm not picking up dog poo nor am I walking the dog. DH still hasn't gotten 'his dog' 😂

You can re-home dogs. You can't re-home children. Hence the complaints.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's important to remember that stand-up is a carefully crafted performance and not really representative of their actual marriage. Same thing when John Mulaney got divorced.

There is generally an element of truth in the performance.