Do you give host gift when DC goes on vacation with another family?

[Anonymous]

Our family always gives a nice host gift to any family that takes a child of ours away for the weekend, on vacation, etc. Do others not do this? We invited a friend of our child to join us on a long weekend trip, all expenses covered, and we didn’t even receive a thank you note. The child and parents thanked us verbally in person, but I was raised to always give a hostess gift AND write a personal thank you note.

[Anonymous]

No, you don't give a hostess gift. It would be nice for the kid to write a thank you note, but you were thanked. What do you want, an award? This is why I don't let mine go.

[Anonymous]

No I would not expect something like a hostess gift or a thank you card in this situation. Give people a little grace op - just because you choose to do something doesn’t mean it’s an expectation. I think what you do is nice, but certainly not the norm or an expectation. It’s best not to do these things having expectations someone will do something in return.

[Anonymous]

I take other kids away with us at least ten times a year and have been doing this for many years. I have never once received a hostess gift or a written thank you note. So no, I’d say it really isn’t something people do.

[Anonymous]

I just hooe they reciprocate (doesn’t have to be trips but take my kid out and pay every once in awhile) - anything more seems unreasonable.

I do also expect them to send their kids with some spending cash. I expect to pay their way but not give them blow money

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine not giving a gift and a thank you card. That's how I was raised and how I am raising my own kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine not giving a gift and a thank you card. That's how I was raised and how I am raising my own kids.

That's fine. Just know that because it's your family practice doesn't make it universal or a norm. Lots of people don't do this and wouldn't think of doing this though they very much appreciate you taking their child on a trip and think highly of you and your family for including their child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine not giving a gift and a thank you card. That's how I was raised and how I am raising my own kids.

That's fine. Just know that because it's your family practice doesn't make it universal or a norm. Lots of people don't do this and wouldn't think of doing this though they very much appreciate you taking their child on a trip and think highly of you and your family for including their child.

Lots of kids don't write thank you notes for birthday gifts, lots of parents don't bother to respond to Evites. Manners are a lost art.

[Anonymous]

What? In all the times my family hosted or my kids/me as a kid/my siblings were hosted I have never seen a hostess gift trade hands.

[Anonymous]

If I allowed my kids to go away with other families I probably would give a nice host gift.

[Anonymous]

We have also taken many kids with us on trips/vacations over the years and have never received a hostess gift. These are close friends (the children and their parents), so that would just be weird!

[Anonymous]

Good god, no! I've never expected nor ever received a gift for taking a kid on an outing/trip with us. I expect a verbal 'thank you' from the kid but that's it - and have always gotten one.

[Anonymous]

My parent rarely did and when they did it was a a gift nobody wanted. Sad because they could have afforded to be more generous and they never reciprocated.

We always give a generous gift and we insist on reciprocating in some way. If I can find out what restaurant the parents like, I give a generous gift card to that restaurant as part of the gift. We like privacy for trips, but will take the child out all expense paid and do other things to repay.

[Anonymous]

You need to just give gifts you want to give and not monitor other people’s gift giving. If you don’t feel adequately thanked, don’t invite the kid again.

I probably wouldn’t do a gift in that situation, I’d just try to do a reciprocal invite down the line.

[Anonymous]

Yes- this should be done. A few months ago we took 4 kids, in addition to our own, to the beach for a week. We paid for everything (souvenirs, food, excursions - zip lining, movies, entrance fees, etc. One of the four families invited us over for dinner. The other three just said thanks when we invited them. No, I don’t expect a medal but if we do something like this, a hand written note or flowers or dinner or a gift card, etc would be nice and warranted.