A vanity question about weight lifting

[Anonymous]

So I just turned 30 and I've read how in our 30s, women lose muscle mass each year. I've decided to try and mitigate that by mixing in more weightlifting and strength training along with my usual cardio. I run and bike, so I've got pretty solid triceps, quads and glutes as it is.

I don't want to become too bulky, and I am I guess still "vain" enough to want a balanced, feminine and toned appearance. Up close, you can tell I'm well toned, but far away and in photographs I'm afraid I just look stocky. I have thick legs that in jeans you can't tell whether they are muscular or just fat. I also have pale skin, so instead of the bronzed chiseled fitness models, my arms and legs look more like white chunks since you can't see definition from afar.

I have a rather small, concave waist (25.5"), but a wide, opera-signer-like ribcage that makes me look less slender from the front.

I'm not one to not do something athletic just to look more "ladylike", but what are some good fitness guidelines that strike the balance between toned and bulky? How much strength training is enough to combat muscle loss due to getting older? And what kind of clothing or fashion advice might you have for outfits that best flatter an athletic body that distinguishes it from a chunky one?

[Anonymous]

Don't worry about it. You are not going to get "too big" unless you shoot yourself up with industrial-strength steroids and lift for hours every day for years on end. That is true for men and women alike, by the way. If you don't take steroids and you lift for an hour, three or four times a week, you won't get bulky, trust me.

"How much strength training is enough to combat muscle loss due to getting older?"

Pretty much any resistance training program that takes 30-60 minutes, three times a week, is going to do that.

[Anonymous]

Hi, I have the same concerns Op. I’m short, so width/strength seems to look proportionately bigger on me (?). Like the length of my arms will never get longer (ok, no one’s will).. but as I get stronger, it just looks like MORE.

I do lift some weights. I am getting stronger and I’m proud of it. I can hold a 60s plank very easily now. So easier that I can focus on form and the abs helping me out too.

One thing I’m determined to work on is the layer of fat on my arms, butt and legs. I think THAT I what makes the muscles look bulkier. That’s going to improve with nutrition I think.

[Anonymous]

I applaud you for wanting to focus on muscle!! More of a fitness tip than a beauty tip: Make sure you are focusing on muscles that will keep strain off your joints but that often get overlooked. Hip flexors, smaller ab muscles, adductors and abductors on your things (is that what those are called?), etc. A physical therapist could guide you. I know of a good one in arlington if you're interested (don't go with INOVA, there are better options that take insurance).

The only way you can look nice and toned is to reduce fat, and then you're getting into the balancing act between maintaining a slight calorie deficit while still maintaining muscle. I used to be very good about this but it took a good chunk of my time and energy, and I'm past the point where I want to deal with that. So I am just focusing on working out and finding flattering clothing. If you are worried about how you look in pictures (aren't we all?) making good choices about clothing, makeup, hair, and accessories is easier than trying to get the ideal body shape.

[Anonymous]

If you have the body type, any kind of meaningful strength training is going to add muscle mass. I could just do push ups and pull ups and look bulkier than many women would want. It's just my build. Trust me, I have very little upper body fat, and people often ask if I'm a swimmer or CrossFit or whatever. I still wear women's clothing and make up and no one's mistaken me for a man. I get what you're saying, but for some of us (possibly you included, from what you say), anything that builds real strength is going to also add visible muscle.

[Anonymous]

It takes like one workout for me to bulk up but it’s temporary. I prefer strengthening without weights (just body weight) but other people like the built look. I think this depends on what you are going for and what you need from your body.

[Anonymous]

I have felt this way too. Recently I upped my workouts (calorie burn) and with IF, I have lost fat and think I’m starting to look more toned and not as big. I don’t know what it is....I guess I have bigger limbs because I have always felt bulky but I’m not that short.

[Anonymous]

This is more about body fat than muscle mass. I lift heavy weights a couple times a week, but just look skinny and toned.

[Anonymous]

You can watch Ahrnold say that this is pretty much a myth. Almost no woman becomes bulky unless they are seriously lifting and body building for competition.

[Anonymous]

Some reassurance here: https://www.livestrong.com/article/13708683-kate-upton-lifts-225-pounds-with-her-hips/

But don't expect to look like Kate Upton bc you lift weights.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can watch Ahrnold say that this is pretty much a myth. Almost no woman becomes bulky unless they are seriously lifting and body building for competition.

I beg to differ. Some women appear slightly bulkier. (I still do work on arms, but I use 2lb weights, and I cut out arm days if I need a break / cross train with running.

I’ll never understand the arguments for the supposed fact that the type of exercise you do influences your muscle build.
Look at any college swimmer who has been doing it for years (top heavy, broad shoulders)
Look at any dedicated lifelong yogi (slim to muscular)
Most soccer players have very strong thighs and calves.

[Anonymous]

^sorry... supposed fact that it does NOT influence your build.

Exercise DOES influence your build/silhouette.

[Anonymous]

I started weightlifting two years ago after about a decade of yoga and running. I remained the same weight throughout (113-116) and was at first extremely happy with the shape changes I saw. I have always been fairly toned but my abs and waist tightened, my butt grew and rounded a bit, my legs became much more defined, etc. my breasts even got perkier due to the pectoral muscles being strengthened.

BUT. This winter I went really regularly, 3x a week and was doing a lot of hypertrophy work and I got bigger. My weight was the same but all my pants and shirts were tighter. I have recently dropped down to 2x a week and am much happier. I still cross train with cardio and some yoga.

I am a small person, but weightlifting absolutely put more muscle on me. Mainly this was a good thing, so OP you should lift, but don’t be afraid to scale back or change things as you go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can watch Ahrnold say that this is pretty much a myth. Almost no woman becomes bulky unless they are seriously lifting and body building for competition.

I beg to differ. Some women appear slightly bulkier. (I still do work on arms, but I use 2lb weights, and I cut out arm days if I need a break / cross train with running.

I’ll never understand the arguments for the supposed fact that the type of exercise you do influences your muscle build.
Look at any college swimmer who has been doing it for years (top heavy, broad shoulders)
Look at any dedicated lifelong yogi (slim to muscular)
Most soccer players have very strong thighs and calves.

If a woman looks bulky it’s from fat. It’s genetically impossible to naturally put on more than 8 lbs of muscle in a year as a woman and to do that would require such insane adherence to the perfect diet and macros and progressively lifting heavier each and every session 5-6x a week that it’s incredibly unfeasible. However, putting on some muscle AND fat can make you look bulky. If a woman lifts weights and looks bulky, it’s not too much muscle. She needs to
Cut the extra fat.