Ask me anything: I am a kept woman

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To a certain extent, this is a normal thing for a wife to be threatened by.

However, it's also a chance for unhappy women to beat up on someone else.

I genuinely don't understand why anyone would think that asking this OP pointed questions makes someone unhappy.

You don't recognize the pile on that's occurring?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To a certain extent, this is a normal thing for a wife to be threatened by.

However, it's also a chance for unhappy women to beat up on someone else.

I genuinely don't understand why anyone would think that asking this OP pointed questions makes someone unhappy.

Yes, you don't understand. The women were already unhappy--not unhappy as a result of asking OP pointed questions. See?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To a certain extent, this is a normal thing for a wife to be threatened by.

However, it's also a chance for unhappy women to beat up on someone else.

I genuinely don't understand why anyone would think that asking this OP pointed questions makes someone unhappy.

You don't recognize the pile on that's occurring?

Sure, but OP put herself out there knowing what the reaction would likely be. And that isn't the point. Why would asking questions make a poster seem unhappy? I genuinely don't understand OP's mindset and am curious about it. I've asked a few questions. But I'm very happy - great husband, great kids, great career. I just don't see the "unhappy" aspect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To a certain extent, this is a normal thing for a wife to be threatened by.

However, it's also a chance for unhappy women to beat up on someone else.

I genuinely don't understand why anyone would think that asking this OP pointed questions makes someone unhappy.

Yes, you don't understand. The women were already unhappy--not unhappy as a result of asking OP pointed questions. See?

Who seems unhappy? If a murderer posted on here and people attacked him/her, would they be deemed unhappy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


You can say what you want about paid sex, but the truth is that some men fall hopelessly in love with their mistresses.

Are you suggesting that the Op's married boyfriend is hopelessly in love with the Op? Where did you get that impression?

He clearly isn't helplessly in love with the woman he married. So no point scored for angry wives.

The man is helplessly in love with - HIMSELF. Doesn't sound like either side of this little debate (wife or mistress) scores any points with that, do they?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He testifies as an expert witness with a professional background and credentials in mental health.

All these details are making me cringe. Why not just call the wife up and tell her if you want her to know?

because she is a narcissist ?

because more anguish and misery can be caused by tarnishing the wife's reputation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP has already said she would have an abortion. I doubt he would have to pay her.

But that abortion was not to get rid of a baby from her sugar daddy.

If her sugar daddy knocks her up, I'm certain she'll extort the money from him to pay to abort it. He's already paying for everything else.

When did she say she already had an abortion?

And when did she say she doesn't use birth control?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To a certain extent, this is a normal thing for a wife to be threatened by.

However, it's also a chance for unhappy women to beat up on someone else.

I genuinely don't understand why anyone would think that asking this OP pointed questions makes someone unhappy.

You don't recognize the pile on that's occurring?

Sure, but OP put herself out there knowing what the reaction would likely be. And that isn't the point. Why would asking questions make a poster seem unhappy? I genuinely don't understand OP's mindset and am curious about it. I've asked a few questions. But I'm very happy - great husband, great kids, great career. I just don't see the "unhappy" aspect.

I'm another happily married wife/mom who is not at all angry with the Op. Just concerned that she is getting herself in deep with a person that may not (probably does not) have her best interests at heart. It pulls at my heart that she was so young (19) when her relationship started with this older man. I don't think she will really comprehend what a power difference there is in their relationships and just how much he has used his life experience, savvy to influence her until she is a bit older herself and looking back on all of this.

I do wish her the best. I don't think that she is a bad person but I do think that she is making some big mistakes that she ought to think twice about. But I'm older and I have years of my own mistakes and my friends/acquaintances mistakes to look back on. For me this whole thing is painfully, crystal clear. But I can see how a 24 year old may see things a lot differently than I do. Especially a 24 year old who cares deeply for this man. Good luck, Op.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He testifies as an expert witness with a professional background and credentials in mental health.

All these details are making me cringe. Why not just call the wife up and tell her if you want her to know?

because she is a narcissist ?


because more anguish and misery can be caused by tarnishing the wife's reputation?

Who needs OP? We're asking each other questions now!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you get pregnant you will become a threat to him and he will drop you like a hot potato. What's your buyoff number? How much will he have to pay you to have an abortion? Because the moment you get knocked up (and you will), is the moment the gravy train stops. So what's your number?

I don't have a number. I am on birth control and not opposed to abortions, so would get one if I became pregnant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, do your parents know you are in a long term relationship with him? Have they met?

When you make plans, does he often decide what to do? Or you? Both?

No, my parents don't know and haven't met. They haven't met my friends except two, from college (from when I was IN college and brought them home with me for visits).
We both decide what to do.

[Anonymous]

When did she say she already had an abortion?

I'm sorry, that one was my mistake. I misread a PP that said "she already said she would have an abortion" to read "she already said that she had an abortion".

OP never claimed that and it was my fault for mis-reading it and causing confusion. I apologize, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he weren't married, I'd say kudos to you.

Being a mistress makes this a bit slimier. No girl power chant for you.

Why the judgement? Why can't 2 people be free to love the way they want? And who are you to judge?

Really, is this love? Do you love him? So you'd rather do this than find a real job because the job market sucks and you want lots of material things? Do you ever think about how this will affect your future? Like if you get married one day and your husband finds out?

[Anonymous]

My theory: OP is having an affair with a married man but it looks very different from what is being described. He pays for things here and there and decided it would be easier or more prudent to keep an apartment. It's not particularly nice but it does the job. He decides the when and where. He does not take OP on trips or cruises. He is not devoted to his wife or OP or anyone else for that matter. OP wants to believe she is the object of affection and avoids thinking about certain realities to allow this belief to continue. She knows deep down that she wasn't and won't be chosen. She wants to hate the wife but that would feel too desperate. So, she plays the mistress who is too cool to care. The problem is that she has no audience. She can't be too cool to care with her boyfriend -- he might lose interest. She can't be too cool to care with the wife -- the wife doesn't know she exists and that would blow the whole thing up if she did. The solution: post an anonymous story on a board whose audience looks strikingly similar to the intended audience. Maybe even post a few angry responses to make it look controversial. Then, do whatever you can to prolong the thread – give tidbits of information to add mystery. Then, when the thread does go on, accuse the married women of paranoia. You are their darkest fear, after all. That’s right, if the wife only knew, her neat little life would be disrupted and he would realize that you are all he ever really wanted. But, OP, you’re way too cool to care about any of that. Right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really don't see how someone who makes less than 1 million dollars a year (and thats at the min) can afford to support another person entirely. By the time you pay for all your cars, your house, your retirement, your wife and childrens needs, your vacations, etc to have enough left over for a.) to support someone entirely b.) without your wife realizing another 70k or so net is gone seems so unlikely.

My husband makes about $1M. I am sure he does not have a mistress that he supports and we have a very happy marriage, but to answer this question, I do not pay close enough attention to our finances that I would notice if $70K or so was "missing." I am the one who goes through the mail and opens the bank statements and credit card bills, but I don't really look at them. When you have a lot of money, it is easy not to pay attention to the details. I would not have realized this before having a high HHI. When I was young and poor, I knew where every penny of my money was.