Despite all this, I’m converting to Catholicism

[Anonymous]

There’s so much bad news re Catholicism on this forum and in the news. I’m saddened to read all the posts by people who have been hurt by the church or are leaving. But amidst all the posts urging people to just go Episcopalian or Lutheran or whatever, I just want to say that the Catholic Church has a theology and millennia-long history that speaks great truth to me. I attended both Catholic and Protestant Churches growing up and was an atheist for a long time. I recently decided to come back to the Catholic Church specifically. I have a long view of history and religion. The sex abuse in the Church is bad but the laity is up in arms addressing it. People keep saying the Catholic hierarchy is uniquely authoritarian and prone to cover ups but i think people forget how utterly HUGE the Church is — it has evolved a hierarchal governance structure for a good reason not as some sort of conspiracy to do evil. It will need to change its governance and that necessarily happens slowly in a church this size. In any event, these are troubled decades for the church but I’m still coming back. I just wanted to post this to convey that I see the truth and the good in the Catholic Church. It’s not a question of picking a social club to me. It’s a question of picking the most true articulation of the teachings of Jesus and his disciples.

[Anonymous]

The sex abuse in the Church is bad but the laity is up in arms addressing it. People keep saying the Catholic hierarchy is uniquely authoritarian and prone to cover ups but i think people forget how utterly HUGE the Church is

I'm happy you've found religion, and that the Catholic Church is your choice.

Sadly, I think history as it stands now needs to rewrite the rules of the Catholic Church. Times have changed, and the Church needs to change, too. It is not natural, or normal, to ask men to marry God for all eternity. Giving your life to God is an admirable profession, but reality is now different. Society is now different.

How can a Catholic priest, outside of blind faith, relate to a married couple? A man in love with a woman? A man in love with a man? Give honest marriage advice? Relate to children, outside of the fact that they were children once themselves.

The easy answer to that is Protestant religions, when Pastors and Leaders can marry and are arguably more relatable and approachable. But, even if a non-Catholic religion isn't for you, I'm not sure I could blindly believe that this sex abuse is going away. Prayers and healing are theoretical. Change has to be real and concrete. I've yet to see a strong, concrete response to this. And the current Pope is the most progressive we've ever seen.

I was raised Catholic. But it saddens me that all of the beautiful ritual and teachings of the church that I learned to love as a child hid decades upon decades and case after case of atrocity.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks for the kind and thoughtful response, PP. I agree that the celibacy requirement may need to be reconsidered. One of the priests at my parish used to be married (he’s a widower) and has (adult) kids. He is indeed my favorite.

[Anonymous]

How can a psychologist who has never experienced mental illness provide therapy to a mentally ill person? How can a teacher with typical learning teach a dyslexic child to read? I don’t believe it is only possible to understand what you’ve experienced. Indeed, some of my best parenting advice has come from non-parents who can see objectively while some of the worst has come from other parents whose perceptions are based on their own experiences, not mine.

[Anonymous]

The Eastern Orthodox Church has all of the history and theology, with fewer weird additions (purgatory) and way less child molestation, if any.

[Anonymous]

Also, Orthodox priests are allowed to get married, which inadvertently allows women a greater role in church affairs and less opportunity for weirdos to enter the priesthood.

[Anonymous]

I simply cannot wrap my head around this. As a former Catholic who truly loved the Church, there is simply no way I could stay knowing what our leadership allowed and worse, covered up. I miss the Church. But I could never give my time or my money to a pedophile ring. And that's exactly what the Catholic Church is.

[Anonymous]

I'm actually leaving now that it is apparent the CC still stands by abusers.

[Anonymous]

I’m agnostic and don’t go to any church. I grew up Episcopalian. My husband is Muslim. Just putting that out there for some context.

Religion is such an incredibly personal choice. We are so lucky in this country that we can choose. In my husband’s home country, you are whatever you were born in to. There is no lawful right to change.

So we are very lucky. Be what you want to be.

To me the Catholic Church suffers from power without accountability. There are no sufficient checks and balances. In the Episcopal Church, laypeople have a decent amount of power over local priests, hiring and firing and such. That’s the change I’d like to see in the Catholic Church. More authority given to the laity. I don’t know of that could happen. But it would help end the molestation with impunity issue. And this isn’t unique to Catholicism. You find it in many independent small churches where there is no check on the power structure.

If I were a Catholic, that’s what I would work toward. I don’t want to see Catholicism go away. But everyone should have space to worship safely.

[Anonymous]

Whatever floats your boat. My mom is a lifelong Catholic and doesn’t give a penny to the church anymore. She also thinks the entire thing needs to be scrapped and redone anew. But if you want to join the church, up to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m agnostic and don’t go to any church. I grew up Episcopalian. My husband is Muslim. Just putting that out there for some context.

Religion is such an incredibly personal choice. We are so lucky in this country that we can choose. In my husband’s home country, you are whatever you were born in to. There is no lawful right to change.

So we are very lucky. Be what you want to be.

To me the Catholic Church suffers from power without accountability. There are no sufficient checks and balances. In the Episcopal Church, laypeople have a decent amount of power over local priests, hiring and firing and such. That’s the change I’d like to see in the Catholic Church. More authority given to the laity. I don’t know of that could happen. But it would help end the molestation with impunity issue. And this isn’t unique to Catholicism. You find it in many independent small churches where there is no check on the power structure.

If I were a Catholic, that’s what I would work toward. I don’t want to see Catholicism go away. But everyone should have space to worship safely.

Very thoughtful post. I agree.

[Anonymous]

^^^ they are so much harder to find

[Anonymous]

For some time bishops were treating offenders as people with mental illness, referring them to psychiatrists and then trusting a psychiatric evaluation to decide whether they were fit to return. So far the actual statistics you show that Catholic priests are no more likely to abuse children than other men -- still too likely, I agree, but that changes the nature of the solutions we ought to consider.

Maybe we need chaperones.

[Anonymous]

Do what you want but don't leave your kids alone with the priests.

[Anonymous]

OP, you may wish to read few Graham Greene novels and essays. A convert, he was a profoundly Catholic author, but in the eyes of many not a very good Catholic. He once described himself as a mercenary for the Church because he ferociously defended it even as most of the time he was an agnostic.