Stop calling yourself blessed when what you are is privileged

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

DP.. I'm so sorry for what you went through, and also for your DH for the worry he is going through now.

I posted above about Job vs Joseph.

Why does God "bless" some people but not others? Why does he let good people and babies/children suffer, while seemingly evil people reap rewards?

That's an age old question. I have no answer. No one really does. There are no good answers. There are stories throughout the Bible of this kind of thing, where some people were blessed while others were not. It makes no sense to me, either.

But when I say that I am "blessed", I am saying that everything I have is from God. I guess just acknowledging the things that God has provided for me.

When I have gone through troubled times, yea, I didn't feel blessed. I don't know.. someone once said that in order to understand compassion and appreciate the good, you have to go through hardship and know what the bad is. I guess it makes sense, but when you are in the midst of the hardship, this is a hard thing to swallow.

God did not fail to Bless Job.

[Anonymous]

Eh, it really doesn't matter if you think they're blessed by a supernatural being or if you believe it's just luck or privilege. You're making superficial assumptions about their lives based on tiny snippets from social media, and you have decided their lives are objectively better than your own. Your jealousy is clearly keeping you from enjoying what you do have. Focus on yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find “blessed” language annoying because a blessing is a gift from God. Do you really think God gave you a nice house and loving partner and good teeth, but decided NOT to give those nice things to the rest of us? No. You probably think some of it is dumb luck (the teeth) and the rest of it is a combination of your own hard work and smarts. But saying you are “blessed” seems to make people feel better about saying “I have nice things! I’m happy and grateful!” Like they aren’t bragging. But God doesn’t withhold nice houses from undeserving folk and give them to the deserving, so I don’t see your nice house as a blessing. I see it as a result of our socio-economic system that rewards some kinds of labor and doesn’t compensate others as well. I don’t think God is a capitalist.

Please explain why God blessed Joseph but not Job?

But ITA, God is not a capitalist. God is a SJW Socialist.

Even Job didn’t get an answer to that question, did he? I am a Christian, but I don’t think believing in God and Jesus means every word of the Bible is true. So I don’t actually believe God murdered Job’s family. I don’t believe God sends us bad things, and I don’t believe a loving God would withhold good things from people randomly, so I don’t actually believe God meddles in our lives that way. I do believe in the concept on “blessing,” but I guess I have found blessings are the things that are open to everyone and found through a relationship with God (acknowledging that God is not only the God of Abraham, but also the Goddess of Wicca and the Buddhist path to enlightenment, etc). Those blessing are things like serenity and empathy and oneness with God. It has nothing to do with trips to Hawaii or whose child lives and whose child dies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok. Let’s cancel overuse of “privileged” next.

This.

If you work for it, you aren’t privileged.

And, privilege shouldn’t become a scarlet letter.

It’s not a scarlet letter. So why not admit you have it?

It is in today's world. Calling someone privileged is a slam against them. It's saying they have something they don't deserve to have. It couldn't have been earned, it had to have been because of their "privilege".

You can earn things and still be cognizant that there are fewer barriers to clear. Privilege is a clearer, or at least less obstacle laden path. For example, we grew up poor but we could still afford the sugar for brand name Kool-Aid. We shopped at bulk food stores because my parents could afford the membership, and had a car to bring everything across the highway safely. We are also white so my parents had fewer obstacles to obtain a loan towards their townhome. We bought second hand everything and wore hand me downs, but the clerk didn’t keep an eye out for me stealing in the thrift store just because.

Your explanation doesn't change that it is a negative to be viewed as "priviliged".

It isn't necessarily negative. What is negative is not recognizing your privilege. So when people "Call others out" for their privilege, they aren't saying the privilege is a bad thing, but your failure to recognize it is.

I am EXTREMELY privileged. I was privileged to grow up in a home with money. I was privileged by parents and parental figures that loved and supported me. I was privileged to be white. I was privileged to be able-bodied, etc. etc. It isn't a bad thing. It is just something to be cognizant of when you are judging others...or developing policy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

Think of blessed as another word for lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

Pp whom you are questioning. I am deeply sorry for your loss. God did not take your child, please understand that. He says in His Word that all good things come from him. But we do live in the natural world and have challenges, loss, disappointments. I too have had deep loss, but my faith tells me and shows me that God is always with me, guiding me, loving me, teaching me and protecting me. When it comes to death I honestly believe that is ultimately between God and that person, their purpose, their journey is specific to them. Yes, even in challenge and loss I feel Blessed and feel the love of the Lord. Despite your unimaginable pain and loss I hope you are able to feel the ways that you are Blessed, your ability to love, the love you had and hold for your child that has passed, your faith, your husband, your heart and your mind. I will pray for your peace.

DP The only people who are blessed are the poor in spirit, those who mourn, the meek, those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, the merciful, the pure in heart, the peacemakers, the persecuted. Not those who have terrific vacations and perfectly healthy, smart children, and a huge house.

[Anonymous]

when someone says they're blessed, to me, it's the same as saying they're lucky, which they might be.

It's not a personal affront, OP. Whether it's luck, privilege, hard work, or a blessing, it doesn't really matter, because the outcome is the same. Just be happy for them and for their acknowledgement that they have something in life to be grateful for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just stop. Here in the U.S. we are privileged and blessed. Try going over to Afghanistan and see how long you’d last. Between the Taliban and ISIS, you’d be lucky to survive a week.

I hate to indulge this incredibly random divergence...but there are many people who live long and healthy lives in Afghanistan, and take pride in their heritage. Yes, absolutely there are some awful conditions there, particularly right now.....but you know there are awful conditions in this country as well, right?

Which is why people are clinging to airplanes or risking being trampled or blown up to get out. Yeah, you’re right, the people here are just the same.

I didn't say that they are the same. I am saying that it is absurd to say that anyone who is in Afghanistan will die within a week is absurd. That country is currently in turmoil, and there is a great deal of violence and oppression, certainly. But to single out that entire COUNTRY as being terrible while holding up the U.S. as some shining city on a hill is both unhelpful, irrelevant to this argument, and extremely reductionist and narrow minded.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Seems like OP is saying people are linking it to their good fortune.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

DP.. I'm so sorry for what you went through, and also for your DH for the worry he is going through now.

I posted above about Job vs Joseph.

Why does God "bless" some people but not others? Why does he let good people and babies/children suffer, while seemingly evil people reap rewards?

That's an age old question. I have no answer. No one really does. There are no good answers. There are stories throughout the Bible of this kind of thing, where some people were blessed while others were not. It makes no sense to me, either.

But when I say that I am "blessed", I am saying that everything I have is from God. I guess just acknowledging the things that God has provided for me.

When I have gone through troubled times, yea, I didn't feel blessed. I don't know.. someone once said that in order to understand compassion and appreciate the good, you have to go through hardship and know what the bad is. I guess it makes sense, but when you are in the midst of the hardship, this is a hard thing to swallow.

Those who are blessed will be judged as to how they use their blessings. It does not mean they are favored; that is reserved for the afflicted.

[Anonymous]

Guys, the word has multiple definitions...and definitions change with usage. More often than not, what these people are saying is that they are fortunate and grateful. Is that somehow wrong?

https://www.dictionary.com/browse/blessed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Redlining. Food deserts. Segregation.

Educate yourself.

Haven’t existed in most of our life times; WIC, SNAP, school lunches, food pantries; people choosing to live in affordable housing in an expensive area or as part of an immigrant community with shared language or with long-standing community (see gentrification arguments).

None of these things are determinative of your life. Ask the millions of people now living who have moved up the SES ladder. If you want to improve social mobility, vote for and insist on functional government that provides law and order and schools with real expectations and discipline. Include vocational education. Eliminating objective measures of educational achievement and lowering overall behavioral expectations for kids, while also eliminating the negatives of poverty will leave the people you say you care about in a terrible way that has nothing to do with racism.

Even the poorest US citizens are “blessed.”

Aren;t yoo leaving out a whole swath of people who have not been blessed with health?

[Anonymous]

They have to call it unearned “privilege” to justify taking it away, which is the obvious endgame of all this. Even if you earned it, the path was supposedly easier for you by definition, there is no individual nuance that means anything. It’s a toxic framing: even if you have been more fortunate, that doesn’t mean you’ve taken anything that rightfully belongs to someone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

DP. I am sorry for your loss. I have had two children die (as well as my husband) and it is hell. However, I was still blessed by their presences in my life even though their lives ended tragically.

You're lashing out and I think you would be better off taking a step back from social media and even news media for a while until you regain your footing. If you have done grief therapy or any type of therapy before but stopped then you should consider going back in to it.

Hugs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Guys, the word has multiple definitions...and definitions change with usage. More often than not, what these people are saying is that they are fortunate and grateful. Is that somehow wrong?

https://www.dictionary.com/browse/blessed

Thank you.