Stop calling yourself blessed when what you are is privileged

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find “blessed” language annoying because a blessing is a gift from God. Do you really think God gave you a nice house and loving partner and good teeth, but decided NOT to give those nice things to the rest of us? No. You probably think some of it is dumb luck (the teeth) and the rest of it is a combination of your own hard work and smarts. But saying you are “blessed” seems to make people feel better about saying “I have nice things! I’m happy and grateful!” Like they aren’t bragging. But God doesn’t withhold nice houses from undeserving folk and give them to the deserving, so I don’t see your nice house as a blessing. I see it as a result of our socio-economic system that rewards some kinds of labor and doesn’t compensate others as well. I don’t think God is a capitalist.

+1. God didn’t bless you by sending you to a nice vacation in HAwaii. It reminds me of many non-Christian religions that believed the wealth and health were a sign of God’s favor, so if you were poor or sick, it must be because the gods were mad at you. It was a way of keeping the poor people down—you weren’t poor because the system was rigged, you were poor because you made the gods mad so you didn’t deserve to have nice things. This is very much the opposite of Christianity.
I also feel like this is something that just came up in the past decade or so. In the 80s and 90s people would say “I’m so lucky I get to go to HAwaii!” Or just “I’m so happy I got to Hawaii!” When did people start attributing this to divine intervention? Really rubs me the wrong way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok. Let’s cancel overuse of “privileged” next.

This.

If you work for it, you aren’t privileged.

And, privilege shouldn’t become a scarlet letter.

It’s not a scarlet letter. So why not admit you have it?

It is in today's world. Calling someone privileged is a slam against them. It's saying they have something they don't deserve to have. It couldn't have been earned, it had to have been because of their "privilege".

You can earn things and still be cognizant that there are fewer barriers to clear. Privilege is a clearer, or at least less obstacle laden path. For example, we grew up poor but we could still afford the sugar for brand name Kool-Aid. We shopped at bulk food stores because my parents could afford the membership, and had a car to bring everything across the highway safely. We are also white so my parents had fewer obstacles to obtain a loan towards their townhome. We bought second hand everything and wore hand me downs, but the clerk didn’t keep an eye out for me stealing in the thrift store just because.

Your explanation doesn't change that it is a negative to be viewed as "priviliged".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok. Let’s cancel overuse of “privileged” next.

This.

If you work for it, you aren’t privileged.

And, privilege shouldn’t become a scarlet letter.

It’s not a scarlet letter. So why not admit you have it?

It is in today's world. Calling someone privileged is a slam against them. It's saying they have something they don't deserve to have. It couldn't have been earned, it had to have been because of their "privilege".

You can earn things and still be cognizant that there are fewer barriers to clear. Privilege is a clearer, or at least less obstacle laden path. For example, we grew up poor but we could still afford the sugar for brand name Kool-Aid. We shopped at bulk food stores because my parents could afford the membership, and had a car to bring everything across the highway safely. We are also white so my parents had fewer obstacles to obtain a loan towards their townhome. We bought second hand everything and wore hand me downs, but the clerk didn’t keep an eye out for me stealing in the thrift store just because.

Your explanation doesn't change that it is a negative to be viewed as "priviliged".

It’s not viewed negatively. Unless, you can’t acknowledge that you had some breaks. A lot of people have a leg up and don’t realize it or think that they earned everything. They started out with fewer barriers. That’s the negativity piece. When you dig in and shout that you earned everything it negates the privilege you oriented from. And most of us with peach color skin have it.

[Anonymous]

I grew up lower income, to uneducated parents. I have a nice home, healthy kids, etc.. have taken, and hopefully will take more nice vacations.

My parents were from a war torn country; one parent was orphaned as a teen with several siblings; another escaped communist forces in a harrowing escape; was a refugee; faced starvation.

I feel blessed, and it's a privilege to live in this country where my parents can live comfortably now with no fear and plent to eat.

I don't know what OP's problem is today. But some of us are really blessed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find “blessed” language annoying because a blessing is a gift from God. Do you really think God gave you a nice house and loving partner and good teeth, but decided NOT to give those nice things to the rest of us? No. You probably think some of it is dumb luck (the teeth) and the rest of it is a combination of your own hard work and smarts. But saying you are “blessed” seems to make people feel better about saying “I have nice things! I’m happy and grateful!” Like they aren’t bragging. But God doesn’t withhold nice houses from undeserving folk and give them to the deserving, so I don’t see your nice house as a blessing. I see it as a result of our socio-economic system that rewards some kinds of labor and doesn’t compensate others as well. I don’t think God is a capitalist.

Please explain why God blessed Joseph but not Job?

But ITA, God is not a capitalist. God is a SJW Socialist.

[Anonymous]

Y’all are ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

[Anonymous]

Is there anything that the umc won’t navel gaze about and tie themselves in knots over? Lmao.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Redlining. Food deserts. Segregation.

Educate yourself.

Haven’t existed in most of our life times; WIC, SNAP, school lunches, food pantries; people choosing to live in affordable housing in an expensive area or as part of an immigrant community with shared language or with long-standing community (see gentrification arguments).

None of these things are determinative of your life. Ask the millions of people now living who have moved up the SES ladder. If you want to improve social mobility, vote for and insist on functional government that provides law and order and schools with real expectations and discipline. Include vocational education. Eliminating objective measures of educational achievement and lowering overall behavioral expectations for kids, while also eliminating the negatives of poverty will leave the people you say you care about in a terrible way that has nothing to do with racism.

Even the poorest US citizens are “blessed.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Posting about your beautiful home, healthy kids, gorgeous vacations, and the like doesn’t make you blessed. God didn’t bless you with these things because you’re such a wonderful person. You’re privileged. Period.

I grew up desperately poor and consider myself to be both privileged and blessed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

DP.. I'm so sorry for what you went through, and also for your DH for the worry he is going through now.

I posted above about Job vs Joseph.

Why does God "bless" some people but not others? Why does he let good people and babies/children suffer, while seemingly evil people reap rewards?

That's an age old question. I have no answer. No one really does. There are no good answers. There are stories throughout the Bible of this kind of thing, where some people were blessed while others were not. It makes no sense to me, either.

But when I say that I am "blessed", I am saying that everything I have is from God. I guess just acknowledging the things that God has provided for me.

When I have gone through troubled times, yea, I didn't feel blessed. I don't know.. someone once said that in order to understand compassion and appreciate the good, you have to go through hardship and know what the bad is. I guess it makes sense, but when you are in the midst of the hardship, this is a hard thing to swallow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I got an education and made the right choices in life.

Apparently it is impossible for some people to fathom that hard work, education, and good choices SOMETIMES pay off in life, and that it is entirely possible that people can earn things through avenues that are not privilege.

Agree with you, with the caveat/modification.

Your chances are better with that history. That's how I did it, but I also know I got lucky. Plenty of people do the same and don't end up better off.

People who prioritize education, hard work and good choices are ALWAYS better off, even if they don’t achieve wealth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Posting about your beautiful home, healthy kids, gorgeous vacations, and the like doesn’t make you blessed. God didn’t bless you with these things because you’re such a wonderful person. You’re privileged. Period.

How do you know?

Counterpoint... I have a crap ton of money and a great job. I live in an amazing penthouse that I purchased. I could literally vacation nonstop for the entire summer and not even put a dent into my wealth.

However, I was also born chunky, fugly, introverted, and socially awkward and have remained that way for my whole life. I'd be doing all of that vacationing alone. IMO - I'm not blessed. I got privilege out the wazoo and no blessing going on over here.

I wasn't raised religious at all - I was raised by two atheists - and I've always wondered if I wasn't blessed because I grew up not believing in any God.

So, when I see someone like you described, I think to myself, 'wow, that person is blessed!'

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just stop. Here in the U.S. we are privileged and blessed. Try going over to Afghanistan and see how long you’d last. Between the Taliban and ISIS, you’d be lucky to survive a week.

I hate to indulge this incredibly random divergence...but there are many people who live long and healthy lives in Afghanistan, and take pride in their heritage. Yes, absolutely there are some awful conditions there, particularly right now.....but you know there are awful conditions in this country as well, right?

Which is why people are clinging to airplanes or risking being trampled or blown up to get out. Yeah, you’re right, the people here are just the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

Pp whom you are questioning. I am deeply sorry for your loss. God did not take your child, please understand that. He says in His Word that all good things come from him. But we do live in the natural world and have challenges, loss, disappointments. I too have had deep loss, but my faith tells me and shows me that God is always with me, guiding me, loving me, teaching me and protecting me. When it comes to death I honestly believe that is ultimately between God and that person, their purpose, their journey is specific to them. Yes, even in challenge and loss I feel Blessed and feel the love of the Lord. Despite your unimaginable pain and loss I hope you are able to feel the ways that you are Blessed, your ability to love, the love you had and hold for your child that has passed, your faith, your husband, your heart and your mind. I will pray for your peace.