Why are men on dating apps losers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP calling all of the men on dating apps losers just turned me off and I would never date her is this came out IRL.

Agree. It's the old, "the women are great and the men are awful' routine. I was on a site because I moved to a new city and didn't know anyone. Don't consider myself loser. Didn't meet the love of my life but did find some women to go to events and learn more about the area.

[Anonymous]

I am Asian. Does that count? Maybe white women have it easier.

I do not think so. I find Asian women very attractive and would almost always respond if one was interested.

Hot (Asian or not) = attention. Again, please examine your profile and see if you can improve it (better photos, etc.)

Many women (and men) confuse the supposition that the men (or women) on OLD are losers with the fact they are not able to attract the men (or women) they wish to attract.

Many are called to be Prom Queen (or Star Quarterback), but few are chosen to be one.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don’t have any trouble attracting professional men. I have dates with two physicians this weekend. They can definitely sniff out who wants them for their money and prestige, and aren’t interested in those women. I make my own money, and I’m very feminist, so the last thing I want is a man’s money. They appreciate that.

What’s more challenging is finding men who will be equal partners and make me a priority. The problem with the professional men is that their career will always come first, no exceptions. I’m not really interested in that. I’d rather be with someone who makes less but is a good partner.

What do you think makes you attractive to professional men?

I treat them like human beings and not ATMs. I don’t like it when men objectify me and pursue me for sex, so I don’t objectify them and pursue them for money.

I have a career of my own and I’m low maintenance/laid back. I have a sense of humor. I ask them to go hiking for dates instead of a fancy dinner or drinks. I don’t try to jump through hoops in a desperate attempt to get a rich man to want me.

For sure not all guys are into me. There are plenty who want more of a trophy, and that’s not me.

Basically just be a good, kind person.

What happened with these guys to where you’re still looking online?

I'm super picky

I have a fulfilling, rewarding life. If I'm going to commit to someone, they need to add to my life, but I find most men take away from it.

I say this with all kindness, but the guys on dating apps aren't the problem. I absolutely agree that many men aren't good for you but in the end you only have to make it work with one (1). Your pickiness at an age and state of life where no one can afford to be picky proves you don't *really* want to be with a man in any serious manner, which is perfectly okay--it's your life, but you're going to have to own it.

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have any trouble attracting professional men. I have dates with two physicians this weekend. They can definitely sniff out who wants them for their money and prestige, and aren’t interested in those women. I make my own money, and I’m very feminist, so the last thing I want is a man’s money. They appreciate that.

What’s more challenging is finding men who will be equal partners and make me a priority. The problem with the professional men is that their career will always come first, no exceptions. I’m not really interested in that. I’d rather be with someone who makes less but is a good partner.

What do you think makes you attractive to professional men?

I treat them like human beings and not ATMs. I don’t like it when men objectify me and pursue me for sex, so I don’t objectify them and pursue them for money.

I have a career of my own and I’m low maintenance/laid back. I have a sense of humor. I ask them to go hiking for dates instead of a fancy dinner or drinks. I don’t try to jump through hoops in a desperate attempt to get a rich man to want me.

For sure not all guys are into me. There are plenty who want more of a trophy, and that’s not me.

Basically just be a good, kind person.

What happened with these guys to where you’re still looking online?

I'm super picky

I have a fulfilling, rewarding life. If I'm going to commit to someone, they need to add to my life, but I find most men take away from it.

I say this with all kindness, but the guys on dating apps aren't the problem. I absolutely agree that many men aren't good for you but in the end you only have to make it work with one (1). Your pickiness at an age and state of life where no one can afford to be picky proves you don't *really* want to be with a man in any serious manner, which is perfectly okay--it's your life, but you're going to have to own it.

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

Any one can be picky or not be picky. But no one is saying to lower her standards just to be nice. That's some sort of baggage you have that you're bringing to this.

[Anonymous]

I have a friend who owns a large pet supply store. Women like OP are his bread and butter. Unmarried, childless middle-aged women spend huge amounts on their pets, since they have nothing else to spend it on.

Keep on the same path, OP. My friend wants to buy a beach house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Ha! Yep, in a lot of ways, I am [picky]. It's served me well!

Has it though? You are on DCUM decrying the fact that you can't get a date on OLD?? Asian women are sought after. Women in general are sought after. Not sure what is going on with you beside you give off a very offputting vibe.

You have me confused with OP. I posted that I have no problem attracting professional, attractive men, and that the key is to have your own life because most men don’t want a woman after his money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have any trouble attracting professional men. I have dates with two physicians this weekend. They can definitely sniff out who wants them for their money and prestige, and aren’t interested in those women. I make my own money, and I’m very feminist, so the last thing I want is a man’s money. They appreciate that.

What’s more challenging is finding men who will be equal partners and make me a priority. The problem with the professional men is that their career will always come first, no exceptions. I’m not really interested in that. I’d rather be with someone who makes less but is a good partner.

What do you think makes you attractive to professional men?

I treat them like human beings and not ATMs. I don’t like it when men objectify me and pursue me for sex, so I don’t objectify them and pursue them for money.

I have a career of my own and I’m low maintenance/laid back. I have a sense of humor. I ask them to go hiking for dates instead of a fancy dinner or drinks. I don’t try to jump through hoops in a desperate attempt to get a rich man to want me.

For sure not all guys are into me. There are plenty who want more of a trophy, and that’s not me.

Basically just be a good, kind person.

What happened with these guys to where you’re still looking online?

I'm super picky

I have a fulfilling, rewarding life. If I'm going to commit to someone, they need to add to my life, but I find most men take away from it.

I say this with all kindness, but the guys on dating apps aren't the problem. I absolutely agree that many men aren't good for you but in the end you only have to make it work with one (1). Your pickiness at an age and state of life where no one can afford to be picky proves you don't *really* want to be with a man in any serious manner, which is perfectly okay--it's your life, but you're going to have to own it.

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

Ha, don’t worry, I don’t!

I attract fewer overall men. Most don’t like that I have other priorities in my life. But the ones I do attract, and that stick around, are extremely high quality. That’s exactly how I like it

[Anonymous]

Op probably vastly overrates herself and will only settle for a chris hemsworth or Chris evans looking dude.

Newsflash honey: you're probably just average to below average.

[Anonymous]

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

No poster suggested that she (the PP) lower her standards to be "nice."

Posters have suggested, with good reason, that she take a realistic view of the type of man who will be interested in her. Specifically, she should understand that being picky eliminates options that are in her league, and by sticking to her guns she is likely to be holding down the fort all alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend who owns a large pet supply store. Women like OP are his bread and butter. Unmarried, childless middle-aged women spend huge amounts on their pets, since they have nothing else to spend it on.

Keep on the same path, OP. My friend wants to buy a beach house.

You think it's a negative not to have kids bleeding them dry? lol ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend who owns a large pet supply store. Women like OP are his bread and butter. Unmarried, childless middle-aged women spend huge amounts on their pets, since they have nothing else to spend it on.

Keep on the same path, OP. My friend wants to buy a beach house.

Are you implying that it's a sad thing to spend one's disposable income on a pet? Unmarried, childless middle-aged men spend that money on video games, beer and Only Fans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

No poster suggested that she (the PP) lower her standards to be "nice."

Posters have suggested, with good reason, that she take a realistic view of the type of man who will be interested in her. Specifically, she should understand that being picky eliminates options that are in her league, and by sticking to her guns she is likely to be holding down the fort all alone.

I’m The PP. I’m not sure why you think this, I have plenty of great men who are interested.

It’s funny how people tell me I need to lower my standards, when I have zero trouble finding attractive, wealthy, sane men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

No poster suggested that she (the PP) lower her standards to be "nice."

Posters have suggested, with good reason, that she take a realistic view of the type of man who will be interested in her. Specifically, she should understand that being picky eliminates options that are in her league, and by sticking to her guns she is likely to be holding down the fort all alone.

I’m The PP. I’m not sure why you think this, I have plenty of great men who are interested.

It’s funny how people tell me I need to lower my standards, when I have zero trouble finding attractive, wealthy, sane men.

You’ve also managed to hijack OP’s thread to go on and on about how great you are while others are trying to answer her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

No poster suggested that she (the PP) lower her standards to be "nice."

Posters have suggested, with good reason, that she take a realistic view of the type of man who will be interested in her. Specifically, she should understand that being picky eliminates options that are in her league, and by sticking to her guns she is likely to be holding down the fort all alone.

I’m The PP. I’m not sure why you think this, I have plenty of great men who are interested.

It’s funny how people tell me I need to lower my standards, when I have zero trouble finding attractive, wealthy, sane men.

You’ve also managed to hijack OP’s thread to go on and on about how great you are while others are trying to answer her.

+1. I don't get the weird hijacking going on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Why can't she picky? So she should just grab the first guy who winks at her? Girl, stick to your guns and don't lower your standards just to be "nice".

No poster suggested that she (the PP) lower her standards to be "nice."

Posters have suggested, with good reason, that she take a realistic view of the type of man who will be interested in her. Specifically, she should understand that being picky eliminates options that are in her league, and by sticking to her guns she is likely to be holding down the fort all alone.

I’m The PP. I’m not sure why you think this, I have plenty of great men who are interested.

It’s funny how people tell me I need to lower my standards, when I have zero trouble finding attractive, wealthy, sane men.

You’ve also managed to hijack OP’s thread to go on and on about how great you are while others are trying to answer her.

+1. I don't get the weird hijacking going on.

People kept asking questions and commenting so I responded. People seem to think that women should settle because it’s impossible to get a quality man, and it’s not true.

My original advice to OP still stands. Focus on yourself, your career, your friendships, etc. Be picky. Don’t choose men based on money - they can smell desperation from a mile away. Everything else will fall into place.