I’m a black descendant of Robert E. Lee

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hello cousin! We are also descendants of Robert E. Lee - though white. We grew up proud of our relation to the Lee-Custis family - only just in the past few years learning about how awful he was.

Here we go...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If Robert E. Lee had black descendants it seems like that would have received a bit more publicity. It has been documented that some of Lee's descendants married into Black families, but that is rather different from what OP is claiming. It's not like Lee has gone unstudied over the past 150 years.

There is no full accounting of our entire family tree. I am no doubt one small seedling of a branch of many.

I think this is what people are trying to understand. How do you know your family line is to Robert E Lee versus one of his family members? That’s what people are confused about.

If you are a black descendant of Robert E Lee, the original ancestor would have been half white and half black. That ancestor likely identified as black and married a black woman, reducing that generation to one quarter white, the next generation one eighth white and the next generation one sixteenth white. Is that what happened?

DP: PP, you started off great, then veered off a bit. Most African-Americans are mixed : Often African, white and Indigenous. Thanks to the “one drop rule” of slavery, the vast majority of people with any African heritage were considered “Black” . I like the way you started off by saying “ identified as Black”. Once you veered off into using fractions, you shifted from “identity” to some sort of measure of racial purity — for lack of a better word. It’s not my family, and I’m not the OP, but I’d suggest that you focus on identity rather than fractions. Again, most of us are mixed, which would make your fractions complicated and not necessarily related to identity. You also seem to be assuming that each generation married someone Black, which wouldn’t have to be the case for a descendant to identify as Black.

I was repeating my family’s history. My sister traced the genealogy of our family to an ancestor whose church records show was born in 1838 near Dundee Scotland. He came to the States as a mercenary in 1862 for the Union Army in the civil war. He had a common law marriage with a freed slave who was a house maid in Hagerstown MD where he settled after the war as a blacksmith. Their children identified as black and subsequent generations had black spouses and identified as black. I did not have my DNA tested, but my sister’s showed she was about 10% Caucasian which could have been attributed to other blacks who married into our family with Caucasian DNA. Maybe I should have used our family as an example rather than the fractions that show the OP may have little left of Robert E Lee in her DNA. I was trying to make her feel better knowing that most of her relationship to him had been diluted.

Previous PP: That's amazing that your sister was able to trace all of that! Thank you for sharing this. I appreciate your very personal, detailed explanation, and the OP may very well appreciate it too!

My reaction to seeing the fractions is related to the practice of using words like "quadroon" and "octoroon" for enslaved people being sold. So, I apologize for pouncing on that -- but, for me, it felt chilling to read. I realize -- now -- that people more used to DNA tests may think very differently about the fraction issue.

[Anonymous]

OP I also have slaves and slave owners in my tree.

REL wasn't just a racist who raped your ancestor,
He is your ancestor too.
We are equal parts both.

That said, if your dad was a serial killer,, or a rapist, you would be horrified of course, but would you feel personally guilty of his crimes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm the 15:30 poster. I just want to thank you for sharing your story and for taking the time to answer my/our questions, which, I hope, did not feel overly intrusive. You've given me a lot to think about, but also a sense of deep admiration for your strength and courage as you share not just your story but some of the process of how you're dealing with and growing with it. Your story is a part of OUR story -- that doesn't often get talked about or truly heard. I wish you much peace with all of it!

Thank you. I appreciate your kindness. - OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If Robert E. Lee had black descendants it seems like that would have received a bit more publicity. It has been documented that some of Lee's descendants married into Black families, but that is rather different from what OP is claiming. It's not like Lee has gone unstudied over the past 150 years.

There is no full accounting of our entire family tree. I am no doubt one small seedling of a branch of many.

I think this is what people are trying to understand. How do you know your family line is to Robert E Lee versus one of his family members? That’s what people are confused about.

If you are a black descendant of Robert E Lee, the original ancestor would have been half white and half black. That ancestor likely identified as black and married a black woman, reducing that generation to one quarter white, the next generation one eighth white and the next generation one sixteenth white. Is that what happened?

DP: PP, you started off great, then veered off a bit. Most African-Americans are mixed : Often African, white and Indigenous. Thanks to the “one drop rule” of slavery, the vast majority of people with any African heritage were considered “Black” . I like the way you started off by saying “ identified as Black”. Once you veered off into using fractions, you shifted from “identity” to some sort of measure of racial purity — for lack of a better word. It’s not my family, and I’m not the OP, but I’d suggest that you focus on identity rather than fractions. Again, most of us are mixed, which would make your fractions complicated and not necessarily related to identity. You also seem to be assuming that each generation married someone Black, which wouldn’t have to be the case for a descendant to identify as Black.

I was repeating my family’s history. My sister traced the genealogy of our family to an ancestor whose church records show was born in 1838 near Dundee Scotland. He came to the States as a mercenary in 1862 for the Union Army in the civil war. He had a common law marriage with a freed slave who was a house maid in Hagerstown MD where he settled after the war as a blacksmith. Their children identified as black and subsequent generations had black spouses and identified as black. I did not have my DNA tested, but my sister’s showed she was about 10% Caucasian which could have been attributed to other blacks who married into our family with Caucasian DNA. Maybe I should have used our family as an example rather than the fractions that show the OP may have little left of Robert E Lee in her DNA. I was trying to make her feel better knowing that most of her relationship to him had been diluted.

OP here. My identity is in God, not the circumstance I was born into. I don’t feel responsible — I feel disgust and anger about evil that contaminates people, and the lies and deception and extent the enemy uses to divide good from evil with the power of manipulation and feelings.

You have to love God and experience it despite pain and BS, to love you. It is a lonely walk. But I know how to submit myself to holy correction despite is being discomforting, without rushing to a temporary band aid to sooth the pain.

A lot of posters are assuming I am feeling I need a bandaid, Or maybe they think I didn’t reply out of anger. No. I went to a quiet place alone because I know when I’m being influenced and overwhelmed by the intensity of feelings, and i tend to be unconventional in how I process pain and difficulty.

I’m going to make sure everyone hears me.


I condemn the sins of my forefathers as do most people that learned of slavery, theft, murder, rape, pedophilia, hate, and haughtiness. I do not support Frump, or treason or any attempt to overthrow the government. I have voted both Blue and Red, but believe there are many of us lost from greed that exploited and divided both parties as a distraction and delay. It is angering to see this is under the guise of Christianity and the Bible, which I walk in without discussion outside of God, and don’t need to defend to know who I am. I am a mosaic of life and death, and just as sinful as anyone else. I have feelings and I’m not special. I just choose God. It is lonely but I have peace this way. I find that context important because I am also super liberal, anti racist, and believe in the power of freedom even though it contradicts with the original intention.

So - I’m not feeling mad at my ancestor, or like there is something wrong with me or something I should be ashamed about. I find the behavior shameful and abhorrent, and have petitioned for exposure to the truth so people make choices based on the information available, and that they have a right to choice, and that they have a right to not be judged for it. Their actions deserve jusgment and consequences, but inherently most people are good and misguided, or untaught and proud so it is easier to stay in the herd to shepherd.

I’m disappointed in the deterioration of our society because we allow these things to be mixed up, manipulated and force fed. that on one of the most intelligent forums I engage on anonymously with so much diviserait, that only a few people out of the THOUSANDS are engaging from a position of hearinf me accurately and not assigning their own interpretation. One person clarified and I respected that, but most are assuming and (unknowninglu) requiring me to spend more time untangling a fallacy than truly having a discussion.

I’m sad that there is more thoughtful engagement with my few, but I’m also appreciative because I don’t feel so bad and understand why sometimes it is just not with the investment to share information in the hopes of enlightenment, because everyone doesn’t use the info for the same purpose. And many people don’t want to know! Several said that. They went to sooth something I wasn’t feeling and didn’t listen to what I asked for.

A forum to discuss, my unique view, not defend it, but share it, and yeah maybe it’s not an AMA I’m not sure but I have to articulate something because clearly no one else ever will.

I don’t fit into a box that people cut and pasted, and I establish my own boundaries in faith and love and wisdom and intellect and safety and security and discretion. I am okay with that.



This is what needs to happen, from my perspective.

Every single text book needs to account for history, sciennce/evolution, politics from the same point in time - identify where there are gaps — provide context to background research, and map to emerging opportunités to display new information in the world.

We are survivors and innovators. Nothing in our past is clean and that is why Christ came and I believe. It angers me that my faith is being exploited with lies and false prophets that claim to support a grandfather that lived in his own sin, like everyone did, and people burned the truth to avoid telling history.

Many cousins out there, many stories like mine. They’ll emerge at the right time as technology pieces together our history and all bodies of knowledge align anyway.

I could be wrong — but I’d i am I don’t feel guilty about choosing to believe in redemption. This is my Easter lesson, and I’m not yet sure how rhis evolves further.

The only request I’d ask is that as a people we listen to others and don’t argue our feelings and project them. It creates silos and if you’re proud or you are your only authority and have never been stretched, it can create a mental/emotional disruption that interferes with building collective thought and introducing collaborative genius to the world.



I’m angry because the discussion is on everything wrong. Kinda like Job — his friends were like was it this? What about that? Man just repent! Eh, you’re wrong. He was silent. Then he spoke his pain. Then God answered, then Job asked for forgiveness and immediately repented from trying to be a know it all, then God said, cool, no problem, make this sacrifice for your friends. And I’m the end, he had more restored than the wealth that was stolen.

Part of my frustration with this as a black woman in Christ that votes blue no matter who / independent

[Anonymous]

... is that ignoring our voices and concealing pain doesn’t neutralize any threat or risk of discomfort. It magnifies it and pushes that social and ethical responsibility for humanitarianism down to an aggrieved population that is left with a barren environment filled with the scraps, and no encouragement ever to just say — hey. Let’s get to work as mean it. And do it. And help each other’s understanding and respect those feelings and judge the behavior not the person. That won’t happen with everyone, but it isn’t fair to attempt to steal that possibility from me. Not from my seat.

That is what’s wrong. It is nearly unbearable when I say, hey your yelling about Tylenol vs Advil is based on decades old blah blah blah. But I’m. I don’t have a headache. I’m in emergency labor. Can you operate?

Patient responsibility begins with listening. As a black woman ive been ignored and dismissed by practitioners before there was more awareness and o leaned to advocate.

If there are people having the conversation, make sure you’re actually conversing and not having a simmony Sam shoot out.

Rhis is why our problems aren’t escalated and our interests (and our i mean people ALL not me not descendants but every single person and culture existing in earth) go to where they know. And why insecurity and fear builds and creates risk.

We are bigger than that. Damn if I didn’t go through all that to have irresponsible journalism interfere with the entire base that provides the demand they wish to serve. If we are aware and just consider changing how we engage — that is a very important step in the right direction.

Thanks for reading. Thanks for the peaceful interactions and I hope the same for you.

Our history books don’t tell the whole story. It was erased and no one is willing to reconstruct it. We spend more reconstructing fossils than the socioeconomic picture of the worlds greatest asset: human capital.

Goodnight!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hello cousin! We are also descendants of Robert E. Lee - though white. We grew up proud of our relation to the Lee-Custis family - only just in the past few years learning about how awful he was.

Here we go...

OP here. Hey cousin! There are quite a few different traits and we have photos of my maternal grandmother that looks white. Just as some blacks passed some whites denied being black. I am not going to say which branch, because I’d reveal too much about my identify and family and that isn’t fair as we have a right to privacy and it is our choice. I respect the fragility here — and of DCUM can find a bobcat hunter i don’t doubt their capability with even descriptions on eye color. Too many smart people here!!

To some degree, we were protected in the lie, which I didn’t think about until just now. Or we weren’t — and made to suffer for it? There was always going to be a painful operation for repair I think no one studied how to do open heart surgery? We were still boiling water for childbirth.

Thank you for showing up. Love you. This is the sliver of hope amidst it all — that we can still stand amongst crumbles and forge a new path.

[Anonymous]

Jeff - thanks for this, can you please lock the thread?

Thank you all for hearing me out and leaving the waters clear of sharks sniffing for blood!

Signing off,
OP (Your sister from another mister)