Husband gave sex ultimatum

[Anonymous]

I don't blame him.

Ask him to ask his Dr. if he can take a viagra or something when you guys do want to have sex.

[Anonymous]

My DH also started taking propecia and couldn’t get it up. Tell your DH to start using latisse. Women use it for their eyelashes and it’s expensive in small quantities if bought here. It works way better than propecia and won’t give him wilted d. You can buy latisse cheaply in bulk from online Indian pharmacies. My DH still has most of his hair and most men in his family at his age are bald as an egg.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame him.

Ask him to ask his Dr. if he can take a viagra or something when you guys do want to have sex.

Why? It does not sound like he wants to have sex with her when she demands it. OP sounds kind of rapey. If the genders were reversed I think people would have different response to OP. OP does not really care about DH’s consent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh my.. another Team DH here. You are the one who gave the ultimatum. How you have the gall to complain about his libido when you have given him this treatment for years is beyond me.. Good for you to get a taste of it, you will understand how awful it is to live with someone who has a lower libido and doesn’t care to change it.

He is right to tell you that he is not going to stop taking it if you don’t change your own efforts. The pill actually helps him not suffer from your rejection, in his shoes I would see it as a win win.

Woman here btw. I have been on both sides of this equation (the low libido compared to high libido partner and the higher libido than DH), and I REALLY understand the issue on both sides. It needs to be a compromise, meeting halfway, and the lower libido partner CAN do something to get himself/herself in the mood instead of just magically waiting for it to happen. I have been there and have no patience for those who cannot make the effort to understand their partners’ needs.

I am the higher libido partner and my partner says because of that fact, it's *my* job to woo her and get her in the mood, not hers.

There is some validity to this. Many people, especially women, don’t experience much spontaneous desire, but do have reactionary desire.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“I told him he needs to stop taking Propecia immediately.”

So YOU gave HIM an ultimatum?

Yeah. I usually try to see both sides of a relationship story and not get overly judgmental based on the text of one post, but this one is just appalling. You gave him the ultimatum, after you got a single dose of what he has been putting up with for years. His hair gives him self-confidence and happiness, and it’s not worth it to him to give that up just to please you a few times a year.

This. You are lucky you are still married.

I had a sexless marriage because of low T and it was just not a good relationship. No normal person would stop taking a pill for sex a few times a year. It is like my exH who refused to wear a condom and I said I was not going on the pill again for sex once every few years.

[Anonymous]

OP are you worried because you want to have sex or because your husband is having a worrying side effect to a medicine? I would be worried if my previously healthy DH started having ED whether or not I wanted to have sex with him— in other words are you worried about him or about you.

For *him* I’d ask him to ask his doctor if this suggests any other cardiovascular issues.

For *you* I’d suggest some very high quality toys. If he wants to join you he can ask his doctor about an Rx.

[Anonymous]

A known effect of propecia is erectile dysfunction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you were fine with your low libido calling the tune when it comes to sex, but now that he’s not in the mood, you’re upset. This is hypocritical. You are in the wrong.

+1 I'll add that OP, you are the one who gave the ultimatum, not him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm jealous of all my gay male friends who are married and nonmonogamous.

Gay men really have it all in that department. It's a good glimpse into what life is like when women aren't the sexual gatekeeper

You should read this, your jealousy will diminish.

https://josephsciambra.com/surviving-gaybarely/

[Anonymous]

Why is this guy even taking propecia? So he can be more attractive to a woman who only wants sex a couple of times a year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is this guy even taking propecia? So he can be more attractive to a woman who only wants sex a couple of times a year?

Maybe he would like to have hair for his own self image? I mean, that’s probably taken a beating by having a partner that doesn’t want sex so at least he can have a head of hair that makes him happy every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you were fine with your low libido calling the tune when it comes to sex, but now that he’s not in the mood, you’re upset. This is hypocritical. You are in the wrong.

This!! Wtf, lady?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is this guy even taking propecia? So he can be more attractive to a woman who only wants sex a couple of times a year?

Maybe he would like to have hair for his own self image? I mean, that’s probably taken a beating by having a partner that doesn’t want sex so at least he can have a head of hair that makes him happy every day.

Apparently he doesn't mind walking around every day knowing that his dick is dead, which would certainly make me unhappy.

[Anonymous]

Yea….i’d much rather have the hair over the 2x a year sex. Now, if you had a higher libido and he thought you actually enjoyed sex, he probably would say screw the meds.

I bet if he found a more sexual woman that embraced his baldness, he’d be a different man.

And like everyone said, this wasn’t an ultimatum.

[Anonymous]

Wow...a man who would rather have hair than sex. Girl, I don't know what to tell you especially since you only want it once every six months.