Question for people who actually know cheating couples

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP’s wife is hotter. Sigh. I try not to think about her with him.

^ BW, can’t divorce. Sigh.

Think she’s good in bed?

IDK. He never says anything negative about her. She’s fit. I know they still have sex because we had “the talk” about risk at the start.

Still never gonna divorce him, huh? You are in therapy, right? Do you tell your therapist you’ve haunted a message board for closing in on a year pretending to be “other women” to get strangers to pile on and plus one you? Because you should. You’re really messed up.

Wth are you talking about?

She’s fixated on one poster. Many ppl have similar issues, but this poster is deeply bothered by one and assumes everyone is her.

I think she’s “the” OW

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP’s wife is hotter. Sigh. I try not to think about her with him.

^ BW, can’t divorce. Sigh.

Think she’s good in bed?

IDK. He never says anything negative about her. She’s fit. I know they still have sex because we had “the talk” about risk at the start.

Still never gonna divorce him, huh? You are in therapy, right? Do you tell your therapist you’ve haunted a message board for closing in on a year pretending to be “other women” to get strangers to pile on and plus one you? Because you should. You’re really messed up.

Wth are you talking about?

She’s fixated on one poster. Many ppl have similar issues, but this poster is deeply bothered by one and assumes everyone is her.

I think she’s “the” OW

No. I’m not an OW nor her enemy. There is one primary poster in these threads who accuses everyone of being an OW, even specifically the one who her husband cheated with. Other posters recognized this upthread. Lolz for sure. There will be another ten threads in a week by her which start off in a general way and then she’ll spin out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP’s wife is hotter. Sigh. I try not to think about her with him.

^ BW, can’t divorce. Sigh.

Think she’s good in bed?

IDK. He never says anything negative about her. She’s fit. I know they still have sex because we had “the talk” about risk at the start.

Still never gonna divorce him, huh? You are in therapy, right? Do you tell your therapist you’ve haunted a message board for closing in on a year pretending to be “other women” to get strangers to pile on and plus one you? Because you should. You’re really messed up.

Wth are you talking about?

She’s fixated on one poster. Many ppl have similar issues, but this poster is deeply bothered by one and assumes everyone is her.

I think she’s “the” OW

No. I’m not an OW nor her enemy. There is one primary poster in these threads who accuses everyone of being an OW, even specifically the one who her husband cheated with. Other posters recognized this upthread. Lolz for sure. There will be another ten threads in a week by her which start off in a general way and then she’ll spin out.

The one that starts spiraling and calling posters whores?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wife is not hot. My AP is crazy hot. I don’t see the point of having an affair with someone that is less attractive. Maybe I’m shallow. But I’m happy. Can’t wait to start a life with my AP.

😘

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife is not hot. My AP is crazy hot. I don’t see the point of having an affair with someone that is less attractive. Maybe I’m shallow. But I’m happy. Can’t wait to start a life with my AP.

😘

I think the point is many different do not want to start a new life. Their affairs tend to be different-usually nobody they meet or will run into IRL. And when that’s the goal, the caliber of women is lower. A hot woman won’t settle for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife is not hot. My AP is crazy hot. I don’t see the point of having an affair with someone that is less attractive. Maybe I’m shallow. But I’m happy. Can’t wait to start a life with my AP.

😘

I think the point is many different do not want to start a new life. Their affairs tend to be different-usually nobody they meet or will run into IRL. And when that’s the goal, the caliber of women is lower. A hot woman won’t settle for that.

* men, not ‘different’

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife is not hot. My AP is crazy hot. I don’t see the point of having an affair with someone that is less attractive. Maybe I’m shallow. But I’m happy. Can’t wait to start a life with my AP.

😘

I think the point is many different do not want to start a new life. Their affairs tend to be different-usually nobody they meet or will run into IRL. And when that’s the goal, the caliber of women is lower. A hot woman won’t settle for that.

* men, not ‘different’

Yeah- that type of affair is sex worker, massage parlor, or married Internet woman. Not an exit affair like the pp of this thread. Caliber will be much lower.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people that I know have done it, it’s been about the connection and not what they looked like. There was a connection in their own relationship missing that they got from the other person.

Totally agree with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people that I know have done it, it’s been about the connection and not what they looked like. There was a connection in their own relationship missing that they got from the other person.

Totally agree with this.

I think an hour once or twice a month is all sex. It’s not like there’s a real connection being made there. Only a false hope.

Maybe on the work relationship affairs where they see each other every day. I can see that.

[Anonymous]

No. Not in the cases I know of. One left his wife and married the other. They were all equal or affairing up, from the men’s perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of the people IRL that I actually know that are cheating its actually the wife that is cheating. The husbands are not fat, they are average and the women are average.

One female I know of that was cheated on was gorgeous, could be a model and was hit on all the time. Husband cheated on her.

Other female I know that was cheated on was attractive and slim. Husband cheated but once he found out tried to woo her back. Didn't work, they divorced.

Two men that I know cheated seemed to be because of insecurity and ego. Their wives were slim and nice looking.

In fact I struggle to think of one where weight is an issue.

Most of the affairs I’ve heard about, also have been the wife cheating. They were all noted SAHs, older kids.

The one personal acquaintance I know that had a midlife affair, wife is super hot and highly successful. He fought really hard to keep her. They look happy.

Half the females I know that cheated were younger, without kids, a few years into marriage, maybe starter marriages, they cheated and all divorced. All remarried.

The other half are older 30's and 40's with children of varying ages and they are the breadwinners in the family, they make a really good salary and their husbands are taking care of the kids more.

At the moment I know more females cheating than males so to me OP's opinion of it being the fat wife at home while the man is out cheating, doesn't ring true for me. I don't see that at all. None of the people I know involved in these cheating marriages are overweight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of the people IRL that I actually know that are cheating its actually the wife that is cheating. The husbands are not fat, they are average and the women are average.

One female I know of that was cheated on was gorgeous, could be a model and was hit on all the time. Husband cheated on her.

Other female I know that was cheated on was attractive and slim. Husband cheated but once he found out tried to woo her back. Didn't work, they divorced.

Two men that I know cheated seemed to be because of insecurity and ego. Their wives were slim and nice looking.

In fact I struggle to think of one where weight is an issue.

Most of the affairs I’ve heard about, also have been the wife cheating. They were all noted SAHs, older kids.

The one personal acquaintance I know that had a midlife affair, wife is super hot and highly successful. He fought really hard to keep her. They look happy.

Half the females I know that cheated were younger, without kids, a few years into marriage, maybe starter marriages, they cheated and all divorced. All remarried.

The other half are older 30's and 40's with children of varying ages and they are the breadwinners in the family, they make a really good salary and their husbands are taking care of the kids more.

At the moment I know more females cheating than males so to me OP's opinion of it being the fat wife at home while the man is out cheating, doesn't ring true for me. I don't see that at all. None of the people I know involved in these cheating marriages are overweight.

OP here. I phrased it specifically in terms of whether men affair up/down because that's truly the cliche. Female cheaters skew the cliche, because women often cheat as an exit affair, so they're auditioning future new husbands. In that case, I would hypothesize women affair up even more than men do!

[Anonymous]

^ a cheater is never “up”. They are liars with morality issues. 2nd marriages have awful track records. 75-80% end in divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ a cheater is never “up”. They are liars with morality issues. 2nd marriages have awful track records. 75-80% end in divorce.

How about third and fourth marriages?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of the people IRL that I actually know that are cheating its actually the wife that is cheating. The husbands are not fat, they are average and the women are average.

One female I know of that was cheated on was gorgeous, could be a model and was hit on all the time. Husband cheated on her.

Other female I know that was cheated on was attractive and slim. Husband cheated but once he found out tried to woo her back. Didn't work, they divorced.

Two men that I know cheated seemed to be because of insecurity and ego. Their wives were slim and nice looking.

In fact I struggle to think of one where weight is an issue.

Most of the affairs I’ve heard about, also have been the wife cheating. They were all noted SAHs, older kids.

The one personal acquaintance I know that had a midlife affair, wife is super hot and highly successful. He fought really hard to keep her. They look happy.

Half the females I know that cheated were younger, without kids, a few years into marriage, maybe starter marriages, they cheated and all divorced. All remarried.

The other half are older 30's and 40's with children of varying ages and they are the breadwinners in the family, they make a really good salary and their husbands are taking care of the kids more.

At the moment I know more females cheating than males so to me OP's opinion of it being the fat wife at home while the man is out cheating, doesn't ring true for me. I don't see that at all. None of the people I know involved in these cheating marriages are overweight.

OP here. I phrased it specifically in terms of whether men affair up/down because that's truly the cliche. Female cheaters skew the cliche, because women often cheat as an exit affair, so they're auditioning future new husbands. In that case, I would hypothesize women affair up even more than men do!

Many men are just looking for available free sex for variety, not exit affairs. The key is availability and discretion, not taking her out to dinners and on vacation- just 40 min in a hotel room once in awhile. Looks are less important and job/career completely irrelevant for that situation.