I’m SO flipping sick of my teenagers

[Anonymous]

Be a better wife? You bitches are ridiculous. No way your kids are happy when you come here and rip people apart. I don’t buy your Brady Bunch nonsense for a second.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They don't need to go back to school they need a better parent.

F*** off. This is difficult for everyone.

NP here. It is super easy for me. My teens are doing great and I am doing great. DL is working out fine. My kids don't have attitude because I have devoted a lot of time in raising them and have not outsourced their care to others. Only today I was thinking that except for the loss of meeting people in a social setting, the pandemic has turned out to be pretty good. We are able to effectively quarantine ourselves, eat good food, stay in comfort in our home and get along with each other.

I agree with others who have mentioned that the "pseudo"-parents who never spent time with their children are now finding them tedious.

Okay, OP here. I take offense to this. I have not outsourced anything. I’ve worked from home from almost five years, mommy tracking myself so I was home for the teen years. Yesterday was a hard day. I’m a good mom, my husband is involved, life goes on. Still I’m ready for them to get out of the house more, and back to a routine. That’s does make me a bad, uninvolved parent, or them bad teens. We just have bad days and need to get back to giving each other more space and kindness.

... Something that is foreign to the DCUM and DCUMer crowd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One day I was thinking “And this is why 18th century parents sent their teens off to apprentice with other people.” Throughout human history, no one has really wanted to spend this much time with their teenagers. Its unnatrual.

this is great

It is also true. Anyone who knows a thing about child development in the teen years knows this and should understand it.

And yet, no one can prove it with scientific citations.

You’re just blowing smoke out of your a**.

Do you normally demand "scientific citations" in the course of a conversation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One day I was thinking “And this is why 18th century parents sent their teens off to apprentice with other people.” Throughout human history, no one has really wanted to spend this much time with their teenagers. Its unnatrual.

this is great

It is also true. Anyone who knows a thing about child development in the teen years knows this and should understand it.

And yet, no one can prove it with scientific citations.

You’re just blowing smoke out of your a**.

Do you normally demand "scientific citations" in the course of a conversation?

If a poster says something again and again and again like it is a fact, yeah, they need to back it up. Otherwise, they have no credibility, and look stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One day I was thinking “And this is why 18th century parents sent their teens off to apprentice with other people.” Throughout human history, no one has really wanted to spend this much time with their teenagers. Its unnatrual.

this is great

It is also true. Anyone who knows a thing about child development in the teen years knows this and should understand it.

And yet, no one can prove it with scientific citations.

You’re just blowing smoke out of your a**.

Do you normally demand "scientific citations" in the course of a conversation?

If a poster says something again and again and again like it is a fact, yeah, they need to back it up. Otherwise, they have no credibility, and look stupid.

There are multiple posters talking about adolescent development and none of them are the ones that look stupid here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm loving having this time with my daughter. Normally senior year I wouldn't see her at all because she would be so busy. I am sad that she is missing all the fun things in her senior year but we are really pals now and it is one of the unexpected gifts of the pandemic for our family.

And I think this is a very selfish view of too many parents.

Nature does not intend for you and your HS senior to be "pals."

No one is saying this is normal but we have two choices: make the best of it or throw a tantrum over things we cannot control. We have chosen the former. I am teaching my daughter how to adapt and thrive despite the suboptimal circumstances. THAT’S normal. That’s healthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm loving having this time with my daughter. Normally senior year I wouldn't see her at all because she would be so busy. I am sad that she is missing all the fun things in her senior year but we are really pals now and it is one of the unexpected gifts of the pandemic for our family.

And I think this is a very selfish view of too many parents.

Nature does not intend for you and your HS senior to be "pals."

No one is saying this is normal but we have two choices: make the best of it or throw a tantrum over things we cannot control. We have chosen the former. I am teaching my daughter how to adapt and thrive despite the suboptimal circumstances. THAT’S normal. That’s healthy.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They don't need to go back to school they need a better parent.

F*** off. This is difficult for everyone.

NP here. It is super easy for me. My teens are doing great and I am doing great. DL is working out fine. My kids don't have attitude because I have devoted a lot of time in raising them and have not outsourced their care to others. Only today I was thinking that except for the loss of meeting people in a social setting, the pandemic has turned out to be pretty good. We are able to effectively quarantine ourselves, eat good food, stay in comfort in our home and get along with each other.

I agree with others who have mentioned that the "pseudo"-parents who never spent time with their children are now finding them tedious.

Okay, OP here. I take offense to this. I have not outsourced anything. I’ve worked from home from almost five years, mommy tracking myself so I was home for the teen years. Yesterday was a hard day. I’m a good mom, my husband is involved, life goes on. Still I’m ready for them to get out of the house more, and back to a routine. That’s does make me a bad, uninvolved parent, or them bad teens. We just have bad days and need to get back to giving each other more space and kindness.

Read what you have written in your original post and the tone of your thread heading. No one thinks that being in a pandemic is good for anyone. Yet, many people, especially those who have not been impacted by the disease or economy or any environmental disasters or the civil unrest, are making do and being grateful. You on the other hand seem to be a hot mess.

Now you are claiming that everything at home is hunky dory and you were just venting? I don't think so. Try and be a better mom and a better wife. Pandemic is hard on everyone. You cannot change what is out of your control but you can absolutely impact the vibe in your own home. Control your behavior and have compassion for what the teens are going through. Make your home a source of comfort and solace to them by changing your response to stress. In other words, Grow the F up!

Omg you are insufferable. You've actually left me speechless.
-DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They don't need to go back to school they need a better parent.

F*** off. This is difficult for everyone.

NP here. It is super easy for me. My teens are doing great and I am doing great. DL is working out fine. My kids don't have attitude because I have devoted a lot of time in raising them and have not outsourced their care to others. Only today I was thinking that except for the loss of meeting people in a social setting, the pandemic has turned out to be pretty good. We are able to effectively quarantine ourselves, eat good food, stay in comfort in our home and get along with each other.

I agree with others who have mentioned that the "pseudo"-parents who never spent time with their children are now finding them tedious.

Okay, OP here. I take offense to this. I have not outsourced anything. I’ve worked from home from almost five years, mommy tracking myself so I was home for the teen years. Yesterday was a hard day. I’m a good mom, my husband is involved, life goes on. Still I’m ready for them to get out of the house more, and back to a routine. That’s does make me a bad, uninvolved parent, or them bad teens. We just have bad days and need to get back to giving each other more space and kindness.

Read what you have written in your original post and the tone of your thread heading. No one thinks that being in a pandemic is good for anyone. Yet, many people, especially those who have not been impacted by the disease or economy or any environmental disasters or the civil unrest, are making do and being grateful. You on the other hand seem to be a hot mess.

Now you are claiming that everything at home is hunky dory and you were just venting? I don't think so. Try and be a better mom and a better wife. Pandemic is hard on everyone. You cannot change what is out of your control but you can absolutely impact the vibe in your own home. Control your behavior and have compassion for what the teens are going through. Make your home a source of comfort and solace to them by changing your response to stress. In other words, Grow the F up!

Omg you are insufferable. You've actually left me speechless.
-DP

+1 This thread has drawn out some real doozies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They don't need to go back to school they need a better parent.

F*** off. This is difficult for everyone.

Actually, it helps to recognize that it isn't difficult for everyone. Sure some people have privileges that make this time comfortable in spite of the inconveniences, but those lucky ducks aside: some people and their kids have flexible, resilient attitudes; and some people and their kids are introverted and so relaxed and energized by time away from socializing. An introvert learns by watching extroverts how to survive a torturous cocktail party with relative strangers or forced office "socials" and "team building." Similarly, those struggling with the social aspects of these isolated times might learn how to adjust your behavior and attitude to cope by observing those who are handling this well.

[Anonymous]

We are doing well with our teens but I don’t find it that unbelievable that others would be “over” it by now and be ready to send them out for their 18th
Century-like apprenticeship. Doesn’t mean parents are bad or kids are bad. I find it interesting on this forum that the second someone has a different experience or even opinion that there is “something wrong” with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are doing well with our teens but I don’t find it that unbelievable that others would be “over” it by now and be ready to send them out for their 18th
Century-like apprenticeship. Doesn’t mean parents are bad or kids are bad. I find it interesting on this forum that the second someone has a different experience or even opinion that there is “something wrong” with them.

X1000. So strange that all these happy people lack empathy, imagination, or compassion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are doing well with our teens but I don’t find it that unbelievable that others would be “over” it by now and be ready to send them out for their 18th
Century-like apprenticeship. Doesn’t mean parents are bad or kids are bad. I find it interesting on this forum that the second someone has a different experience or even opinion that there is “something wrong” with them.

X1000. So strange that all these happy people lack empathy, imagination, or compassion.

Absolutely this. Teens (like other humans) are different. Some need more space, some need less space, some need more social interaction, some need less, some need to push back more or less. Imagine that! It doesn't mean that one was raised better than the other. People are just different. The people who say "My teens are perfectly happy and lovely at home because I raised them right!" are also probably the people who said "My baby sleeps through the night because I sleep trained correctly!" or "My kid eats everything because I didn't put up with picky eating!". They have a small sample size, so they incorrectly conclude that their actions were directly responsible for a particular outcome, without recognizing potentially confounding variables at play.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They don't need to go back to school they need a better parent.

F*** off. This is difficult for everyone.

+1000. The people flaming the OP are not going through this. Every parent of a teen wants them out of the house. It is unnatural and unhealthy for teens to spend 24 / 7 at home with parents. They need to get out of the damn house and be with friends and other adults. It’s destroying mental health on both sides of this. It’s been seven damn months. And the electronics / social media make it a thousand times worse.

Wrong. Two teens here. They are doing well. I love spending time with them.

You’ve enjoyed them every second of every day for seven months?

Doubtful.

Not that poster but we do. We have a small house. We are all home or they are with one parent.

The comment wasn’t about living arrangements, it was about having happy, joy filled days, every day for seven months.

Yes, we've enjoyed it. Its been nice to have the time to relax and not have all the travel and other things going on that we now can do virtually. DL has been great too. Now we eat the majority of meals together and spend nights hanging out. I will miss mine when they go off to college.

Its not an either or proposition, but keep trying to smugly rub your bliss in other's faces. You can love time with your teens AND also miss time that you had for your OWN interests and friends and THEIR own independent interests and friends

[Anonymous]

OP, you are perfectly fine and your opinion is totally understandable. It doesn't mean you don't love your kids, you are just telling it like it is. A lot of hypocrites here, probably compensating for working all the time and only now realizing how much they miss their kids. Or for emotionaly abusing their teens for love and support, under pretense of caring for them. It is their guilt talking and trying to shame you.
I am sure your kids are just as sick of you, as they should be. Regardless of the pandemic, last generations of teens have been denied the opportunity to grow up because they have parents like these posting here. Clingy, insane, helicopters, or never there parents who forbid their teens from doing things teens do. Who hire chauffers, nannies for every minute of their teens lives. All those that are having the best time ever, probably are having teens who are having the worst time ever with these insane parents.