Guy Acting Weird After Sex..

[Anonymous]

I had a guy do that. Turns out he was in the middle of a divorce. Totally tried to gaslight me and make it about me wanting more (like deep commitment). I didn’t, we were just casually dating as far as I was concerned. He was a total headcase. Decent lay though. It’s too bad he didn’t wait until after divorce/therapy. The one difference though is that he initiated. Men can get emotionally complicated with sex as easily as women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nice comment! You know how to get a man’s attention. He had sex with you but may figure that your comment is reflective of someone who says it frequently to random guys.

As a guy I agree. If he’s looking for a future wife your comment killed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, with a comment like that, you made it pretty clear why you were dating him. Why would you expect him to take you seriously as a relationship partner after that comment?

Uh, yeah. Also, while it was good for you, it might not have been good for him. Odd for a man to turn down sex with a new partner.

X2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been dating a guy for around a month. We have been on 5 dates. He hadn’t made a move, and I decided I wanted to. I said something like “ Do you want to f*ck already”, and he laughed, but still didn’t make a move. I ended up making the first move and we had sex, which was very good in my opinion. Now he is acting weird. Barely kissed me in the morning, and turned down sex this morning. I’m very confused. He pursued me, and asked me out for every date we had. He seemed to enjoy sex last night. I feel like it was going well, and I just don’t understand why he’s acting weird. We are supposed to hang out tonight, but I’m almost feel like canceling.

LOL bet you are not as good as you think you are- ie he did not enjoy it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He could have a girlfriend, but he’s not married. We hung out twice at his place, and I stayed the night at his place. I agree it was a little wrong to say that, but oh well. I was a little tipsy ( rarely drink), and I don’t sleep around, but I understand it’s hard for him to know that. He’s not religious or anything. He also has been very touchy since our first date. I did make a move after he laughed, but it’s not like I forced him. He’s the one that wanted to move from the couch to his bed, and we had sex multiple times last night. He kissed me this morning, but it was quick, and said he was “ too tired” for sex. I let because I had plans, and started to feel weird. He texted me “ How was breakfast” like an hour ago, but now I just feel weird.

L O L

[Anonymous]

Nothing wrong with the comment. Oh m a conservative person too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe he was turned on so said yes but in hindsight is grossed out by you being conservative. Any woman (or person for that matter) who says she’s not a feminist is woefully ignorant about what feminism is. Maybe he doesn’t want to be with a woman who doesn’t think she should have the same opportunities as any human. I mean, that’s strangely self loathing and hateful.

Guy here. I've slept with plenty of women who say they are feminists and also women who say they disdain feminism. They both like and want sex about the same, all other things being equal. Can't speak for most guys, but I don't actually care what your political opinions are, and the less I hear about them the better. Your opinions won't gross me out because I'm basically tuning them out anyway. What I care about is that she wants to get physical, and from that point of view, the OP sounds perfect to me.

I don't know what's going on with the OP's boyfriend - performance anxiety? - but there are plenty of guys out there who have high drive if he doesn't.

[Anonymous]

Guy here - when I was in college and my early 20’s I would have been fine with a comment like that or better said thrilled by a comment like that. But when I hit my late 20’s I was thinking about my future so my “dating filter” changed and I would have been turned off by a comment like that though no doubt I would have taken her up on the offer but only once.

[Anonymous]

I agree that OP probably put herself on the whore side of his madonna/whore view of the world

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He could have a girlfriend, but he’s not married. We hung out twice at his place, and I stayed the night at his place. I agree it was a little wrong to say that, but oh well. I was a little tipsy ( rarely drink), and I don’t sleep around, but I understand it’s hard for him to know that. He’s not religious or anything. He also has been very touchy since our first date. I did make a move after he laughed, but it’s not like I forced him. He’s the one that wanted to move from the couch to his bed, and we had sex multiple times last night. He kissed me this morning, but it was quick, and said he was “ too tired” for sex. I let because I had plans, and started to feel weird. He texted me “ How was breakfast” like an hour ago, but now I just feel weird.

It sounds like you’re acting just as weird as you perceive him to be. If you cancel your date tonight, you’re confirming an reservations he had. Maybe he wasn’t really ready for sex and he just went along because he was close to being ready and got caught up in the moment. Then he felt awkward I. The morning. Imagine how you’d like to be treated.

Sounds like she’s going to MeToo him in about six months.

You can argue that it’s overblown but that fear is animating many men these days even otherwise liberal ones. I’ve been a Democrat for 15 years and I still follow the Pence rule.

OP here. No MeTOO move for me. I’m a conservative. I’m not a feminist.

You don't think women should have equal rights? Why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For the poster saying I took an advantage of him, I didn’t. If he told me no, or pushed me away, I would have listened. As a sexual abuse survivor, I would never pressure anyone, or do something they’re uncomfortable doing. I did make the first move, but he wanted to move to the bedroom. We had sex 3 times, 2 of which he initiated after we had sex the first time.

We had dinner last night and he actually himself. I just flat out asked him if he was okay with the situation, and he said he was. He then explained he wanted to have sex with me but was nervous because he has issues with his testosterone and ejaculation. Sex is usually fine, but sometimes he ejaculates early, or not at all. He was embarrassed about ejaculating too early, and me thinking he was bad in bed. The morning after he was tired, and wasn’t sure he could have sex after the night of 3 times. Everything is good and he assured me he had fun. He also said the comment I made turned him on.

Well, there you go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He could have a girlfriend, but he’s not married. We hung out twice at his place, and I stayed the night at his place. I agree it was a little wrong to say that, but oh well. I was a little tipsy ( rarely drink), and I don’t sleep around, but I understand it’s hard for him to know that. He’s not religious or anything. He also has been very touchy since our first date. I did make a move after he laughed, but it’s not like I forced him. He’s the one that wanted to move from the couch to his bed, and we had sex multiple times last night. He kissed me this morning, but it was quick, and said he was “ too tired” for sex. I let because I had plans, and started to feel weird. He texted me “ How was breakfast” like an hour ago, but now I just feel weird.

It sounds like you’re acting just as weird as you perceive him to be. If you cancel your date tonight, you’re confirming an reservations he had. Maybe he wasn’t really ready for sex and he just went along because he was close to being ready and got caught up in the moment. Then he felt awkward I. The morning. Imagine how you’d like to be treated.

Sounds like she’s going to MeToo him in about six months.

You can argue that it’s overblown but that fear is animating many men these days even otherwise liberal ones. I’ve been a Democrat for 15 years and I still follow the Pence rule.

OP here. No MeTOO move for me. I’m a conservative. I’m not a feminist.

You don't think women should have equal rights? Why not?

Your assumption that feminism is about women having equal rights is stupid and false.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He could have a girlfriend, but he’s not married. We hung out twice at his place, and I stayed the night at his place. I agree it was a little wrong to say that, but oh well. I was a little tipsy ( rarely drink), and I don’t sleep around, but I understand it’s hard for him to know that. He’s not religious or anything. He also has been very touchy since our first date. I did make a move after he laughed, but it’s not like I forced him. He’s the one that wanted to move from the couch to his bed, and we had sex multiple times last night. He kissed me this morning, but it was quick, and said he was “ too tired” for sex. I let because I had plans, and started to feel weird. He texted me “ How was breakfast” like an hour ago, but now I just feel weird.

It sounds like you’re acting just as weird as you perceive him to be. If you cancel your date tonight, you’re confirming an reservations he had. Maybe he wasn’t really ready for sex and he just went along because he was close to being ready and got caught up in the moment. Then he felt awkward I. The morning. Imagine how you’d like to be treated.

Sounds like she’s going to MeToo him in about six months.

You can argue that it’s overblown but that fear is animating many men these days even otherwise liberal ones. I’ve been a Democrat for 15 years and I still follow the Pence rule.

OP here. No MeTOO move for me. I’m a conservative. I’m not a feminist.

You don't think women should have equal rights? Why not?

Your assumption that feminism is about women having equal rights is stupid and false.

At the core its the only thing that really matters. The disagreement isn't about the goal, its usually about the size of the problem and how to fix it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He could have a girlfriend, but he’s not married. We hung out twice at his place, and I stayed the night at his place. I agree it was a little wrong to say that, but oh well. I was a little tipsy ( rarely drink), and I don’t sleep around, but I understand it’s hard for him to know that. He’s not religious or anything. He also has been very touchy since our first date. I did make a move after he laughed, but it’s not like I forced him. He’s the one that wanted to move from the couch to his bed, and we had sex multiple times last night. He kissed me this morning, but it was quick, and said he was “ too tired” for sex. I let because I had plans, and started to feel weird. He texted me “ How was breakfast” like an hour ago, but now I just feel weird.

It sounds like you’re acting just as weird as you perceive him to be. If you cancel your date tonight, you’re confirming an reservations he had. Maybe he wasn’t really ready for sex and he just went along because he was close to being ready and got caught up in the moment. Then he felt awkward I. The morning. Imagine how you’d like to be treated.

Sounds like she’s going to MeToo him in about six months.

You can argue that it’s overblown but that fear is animating many men these days even otherwise liberal ones. I’ve been a Democrat for 15 years and I still follow the Pence rule.

OP here. No MeTOO move for me. I’m a conservative. I’m not a feminist.

You don't think women should have equal rights? Why not?

Your assumption that feminism is about women having equal rights is stupid and false.

At the core its the only thing that really matters. The disagreement isn't about the goal, its usually about the size of the problem and how to fix it.

The disagreement is about the goal, because the goal of feminism is not "equality" but female supremacy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe he was turned on so said yes but in hindsight is grossed out by you being conservative. Any woman (or person for that matter) who says she’s not a feminist is woefully ignorant about what feminism is. Maybe he doesn’t want to be with a woman who doesn’t think she should have the same opportunities as any human. I mean, that’s strangely self loathing and hateful.

Guy here. I've slept with plenty of women who say they are feminists and also women who say they disdain feminism. They both like and want sex about the same, all other things being equal. Can't speak for most guys, but I don't actually care what your political opinions are, and the less I hear about them the better. Your opinions won't gross me out because I'm basically tuning them out anyway. What I care about is that she wants to get physical, and from that point of view, the OP sounds perfect to me.

I don't know what's going on with the OP's boyfriend - performance anxiety? - but there are plenty of guys out there who have high drive if he doesn't.

Gross.