DUMBEST argument, but bigger issues

[Anonymous]

He’s trying to Jedi mind-trick you. It’s not working.

[Anonymous]

For something you profess not to care about (what kind of milk your husband buys/you drink), you sure seem to...care a lot about what kind of milk your husband buys/you drink.

If this had happened in my house I would have said “oh babe I noticed this is regular milk and not soy” and then my husband would have said “oh sorry, do you need almond? can I go get you the right kind?” and I would have said “oh no big deal!” assuming I didn’t really NEED something different. But we actually like and respect each other so maybe that’s where the difference lies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For something you profess not to care about (what kind of milk your husband buys/you drink), you sure seem to...care a lot about what kind of milk your husband buys/you drink.

If this had happened in my house I would have said “oh babe I noticed this is regular milk and not soy” and then my husband would have said “oh sorry, do you need almond? can I go get you the right kind?” and I would have said “oh no big deal!” assuming I didn’t really NEED something different. But we actually like and respect each other so maybe that’s where the difference lies.

OMFG did you read the OP??

“Husband goes to Costco to get more, and comes back with regular milk. I was confused and said, "did you decide you'd rather go with the regular milk?" sort of really confused” because who wouldn’t be??

“he goes from zero to sixty on this one question - tells me over and over it's soy milk.” The guy is mental

[Anonymous]

I’ve been there where each side is like “WHY do you care so much. It’s just milk.”

And it’s esp annoying when you’re thinking “yes! I know. Why are YOU caring about this?”

The weird reasoning has even been used on this thread, against both sides!!

And you just can’t trace back fully who made it an issue. Did wife, because she brought it into conversation? Or dh because he flipped out more than you would over milk? Or her bc she kept it going? Etc.

[Anonymous]

Just buy your own soy milk; if he yells at you for it, then ignore him. Walk out of the room and refuse to engage.

[Anonymous]

DH here.

When I’ve gotten the wrong item from the grocery store, I will piss and moan about going back to get it, why does it matter so much to DW, etc. Plus I’ve gotta get dinner going and get DD2 to bed.

But I’ve never tried to claim the milk with a cow on it is soy milk or claim that I didn’t make a mistake. Gaslighting is usually more subtle I thought. I’m thinking straight out dementia here.

[Anonymous]

I would just buy my own non dairy milk and refuse to engage, esp if it is a one off thing. Don't argue with someone who needs to be right this badly. in fact,depriving them of the opportunity to prove themselves is
the best response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For something you profess not to care about (what kind of milk your husband buys/you drink), you sure seem to...care a lot about what kind of milk your husband buys/you drink.

If this had happened in my house I would have said “oh babe I noticed this is regular milk and not soy” and then my husband would have said “oh sorry, do you need almond? can I go get you the right kind?” and I would have said “oh no big deal!” assuming I didn’t really NEED something different. But we actually like and respect each other so maybe that’s where the difference lies.

Uhhhh, when op pointed out the milk, her husband said she was wrong. NOT "Oh sweetie pie, I shall return to the store for you."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He probably feels dumb for buying the wrong milk and didn't like it being pointed out.

He should still grow up, say Ooops, and move on.

Brushing everything under the rug is the recipe for a disaster, or two or three.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just buy your own soy milk; if he yells at you for it, then ignore him. Walk out of the room and refuse to engage.

Just do everything. Just like he wants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He’s trying to Jedi mind-trick you. It’s not working.

Aka gaslighting

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry OP but this is a funny story. I personally would roll with it and make it a running joke. "Can you hand me the salt? oh I'm sorry I meant the milk" "Dear, can you turn off the faucet? don't want to waste milk." Hand him a beer and say, here's your milk!

Obviously not great that he yelled at you, but assuming this is basically a one-off, I don't know that it really needs to be all that deep. And it IS funny. And your post is funny. Thanks for the chuckle.

This doesn’t work so well with raging lunatics that can’t handle nor admit their own shortcomings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry OP but this is a funny story. I personally would roll with it and make it a running joke. "Can you hand me the salt? oh I'm sorry I meant the milk" "Dear, can you turn off the faucet? don't want to waste milk." Hand him a beer and say, here's your milk!

Obviously not great that he yelled at you, but assuming this is basically a one-off, I don't know that it really needs to be all that deep. And it IS funny. And your post is funny. Thanks for the chuckle.

This doesn’t work so well with raging lunatics that can’t handle nor admit their own shortcomings.

Oh please. Buying the wrong milk isn’t a shortcoming, it’s a simple mistake that normal human beings make. Treating mistakes like some huge moral failing is probably why he blew up in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Exactly. So why can’t he admit this once-in-a-Blue-moon mistake?

[Anonymous]

He sounds the same as my sister and she’s always like this even when she’s wrong. She recently bought a new car seat for my 1 1/2 year old nephew and asked me to install it. She said that it was for rear facing all the way up to booster and that she wanted it installed rear facing. I pick up the box and see that it’s only a harness to booster seat and tell her this and she starts screaming that it’s for rear facing too and that she read the box and it says it right there. It clearly didn’t but she still insisted she was right. I’m not sure how I’d deal with her if she were my husband, though.