How are Mormons so nice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have known a group of Mormon lawyers for almost a decade and not one has ever gossiped, shirked work, boasted, been caught in a lie, or lost their temper to my knowledge. I have been to their houses, met their wives, worked closely with them on miserable cases with long days, late nights, and awful colleagues. I have seen them each under extreme pressure and in unfair situations. Yet, they have been unfailingly kind, patient, calm, and good.

How is this possible?

There is literally no one else I have ever known who has kept up such exemplary behavior for even a week. Not even other religious people I know (who profess to have the "joy of the Lord" and other such nonsense, but are worse than most athiests and agnostics who profess no such moral standards).

I don't have a religious bone in my body, but I would love to learn how to maintain such exemplary behavior. I would also love to teach it to my kids.

Hmm. Your standards seem low, depending on what kind of pressure you're talking about. Most of my attorney colleagues, myself included, fit the bill you described.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Related to this topic, I am fascinated by the fact that so many successful bloggers are Mormon.

Stephanie Nielson is a Mormon blogger and one of the most shallow, vile people I've come across.

So is the Dooce lady

She was raised Mormon. She has not been a member for sometime.

She's also made of crazy, Mormon or not.

I'm not a Dooce fan, but at least she owns her mental health issues. She gave a voice to a lot of women with PPD before it was widely discussed and used her powers for good to put the Church on blast over the Prop 8 bullshit. I'm one of the PPs who is a former Mormon and I suspect Dooce's life would be a lot different today if she hadn't been raised in that mess.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had 3 Mormon nannies and a bunch of babysitters. They were as the op describes: kind, warm, loving, and good natured. Interestingly, they were totally non-judgemental - we could leave wine bottles on the kitchen counter and shed kindly rinse them out and place them into recycling.

Same with the Mormons I know. The nicest people. Never judge us or try to convert us. We spend a decent amount of time around them and have known them for a few years. They don't drink any caffeinated beverages and of course they don't drink alcohol, but they don't judge us for doing it. The parents are so loving towards the children and the children are so polite, respectful and well behaved/mannered. I value the time my kids spend with these families because they are so good to my kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had 3 Mormon nannies and a bunch of babysitters. They were as the op describes: kind, warm, loving, and good natured. Interestingly, they were totally non-judgemental - we could leave wine bottles on the kitchen counter and shed kindly rinse them out and place them into recycling.

Same with the Mormons I know. The nicest people. Never judge us or try to convert us. We spend a decent amount of time around them and have known them for a few years. They don't drink any caffeinated beverages and of course they don't drink alcohol, but they don't judge us for doing it. The parents are so loving towards the children and the children are so polite, respectful and well behaved/mannered. I value the time my kids spend with these families because they are so good to my kids.

Yes, exactly. They were all also very honest about their beliefs and why and how they chose to remain dry / wear the garments. The nannies we had were very educated and smart, but clearly, wanted to be mothers above and beyond anything else, so nannying was equivalent to a dream internship... This was the only downside I saw to the Mormon culture. I also thought it was really lovely how they were totally un-offended by the play The Book of Mormon - my nanny had a good laugh about it and reflected that much of it was accurate... I'm Muslim and you won't find very many Muslims feeling good about a Broadway play mocking them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I work for a large fortune 500 company that was founded by Mormons. I have to tell you this is the most ethical company I have ever worked in and ironically the most LGBT friendly company as well. I definitely see with the OP sees.

The one that rhymes with Chariot? That is the perception at least.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The highest rate of Prozac use is by Utah women.

[b]
I don't believe that. Don't post lies.

NP - it's absolutely true. Mormon women marry too young, often don't finish college, and have too many babies too fast. They aren't allowed to hold either of the priesthoods in the church so are relegated to women's relief society. Half of my family is mormon. It's crushing what it does to women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have known a group of Mormon lawyers for almost a decade and not one has ever gossiped, shirked work, boasted, been caught in a lie, or lost their temper to my knowledge. I have been to their houses, met their wives, worked closely with them on miserable cases with long days, late nights, and awful colleagues. I have seen them each under extreme pressure and in unfair situations. Yet, they have been unfailingly kind, patient, calm, and good.

How is this possible?

There is literally no one else I have ever known who has kept up such exemplary behavior for even a week. Not even other religious people I know (who profess to have the "joy of the Lord" and other such nonsense, but are worse than most athiests and agnostics who profess no such moral standards).

I don't have a religious bone in my body, but I would love to learn how to maintain such exemplary behavior. I would also love to teach it to my kids.

Hmm. Your standards seem low, depending on what kind of pressure you're talking about. Most of my attorney colleagues, myself included, fit the bill you described.

OP here. Oh, okay. We'll pretend most lawyers aren't simply god awful in response to the pressures I describe. You're a good example. Here you are taking a jab at me for no reason as having "low" standards. Rude and confrontational. You can't help yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have known a group of Mormon lawyers for almost a decade and not one has ever gossiped, shirked work, boasted, been caught in a lie, or lost their temper to my knowledge. I have been to their houses, met their wives, worked closely with them on miserable cases with long days, late nights, and awful colleagues. I have seen them each under extreme pressure and in unfair situations. Yet, they have been unfailingly kind, patient, calm, and good.

How is this possible?

There is literally no one else I have ever known who has kept up such exemplary behavior for even a week. Not even other religious people I know (who profess to have the "joy of the Lord" and other such nonsense, but are worse than most athiests and agnostics who profess no such moral standards).

I don't have a religious bone in my body, but I would love to learn how to maintain such exemplary behavior. I would also love to teach it to my kids.

Hmm. Your standards seem low, depending on what kind of pressure you're talking about. Most of my attorney colleagues, myself included, fit the bill you
described.

My experience has been like OP's but only to a certain degree. Superficially very nice, but I've noticed that a lot of Mormon lawyers seem to carry the "Rules don't apply to me" attitude because, after all, they are going to be a God one day with many wives and have their own planet. So while they are very nice up front, it is only later that I find out that they lied on their bar application or that they have been disbarred from three states. I see them cut rules right and left. On the Mormon side of my family I see the same attitude ("I hold the priesthood") when it comes to paying taxes (default), driving (recklessly), paying speeding tickets, gambling, and paying alimony and child support (not) to non-Mormon ex-wife. They definitely protect their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have known a group of Mormon lawyers for almost a decade and not one has ever gossiped, shirked work, boasted, been caught in a lie, or lost their temper to my knowledge. I have been to their houses, met their wives, worked closely with them on miserable cases with long days, late nights, and awful colleagues. I have seen them each under extreme pressure and in unfair situations. Yet, they have been unfailingly kind, patient, calm, and good.

How is this possible?

There is literally no one else I have ever known who has kept up such exemplary behavior for even a week. Not even other religious people I know (who profess to have the "joy of the Lord" and other such nonsense, but are worse than most athiests and agnostics who profess no such moral standards).

I don't have a religious bone in my body, but I would love to learn how to maintain such exemplary behavior. I would also love to teach it to my kids.

Hmm. Your standards seem low, depending on what kind of pressure you're talking about. Most of my attorney colleagues, myself included, fit the bill you
described.

My experience has been like OP's but only to a certain degree. Superficially very nice, but I've noticed that a lot of Mormon lawyers seem to carry the "Rules don't apply to me" attitude because, after all, they are going to be a God one day with many wives and have their own planet. So while they are very nice up front, it is only later that I find out that they lied on their bar application or that they have been disbarred from three states. I see them cut rules right and left. On the Mormon side of my family I see the same attitude ("I hold the priesthood") when it comes to paying taxes (default), driving (recklessly), paying speeding tickets, gambling, and paying alimony and child support (not) to non-Mormon ex-wife. They definitely protect their own.

Disbarment is very rare, as is public disclosure of a bar application lie. Hard to believe you know multiple people, specifically Mormons, who are guilty of those things.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, it's so nice and friendly to turn your gay child out onto the streets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:my mormon coworker is very "nice" but he is passive aggressive as hell and engages in little power plays all the time. Which he covers up by being very "nice." ugh.

Superficial and smug are two words that come to mind. I work with someone who's not a team player. He'll go overboard for his church and family but he won't collaborate with us. At this point, I've "shunned" him, as I've learned how to get around him in order to get my own work done/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The highest rate of Prozac use is by Utah women.

[b]
I don't believe that. Don't post lies.

NP - it's absolutely true. Mormon women marry too young, often don't finish college, and have too many babies too fast. They aren't allowed to hold either of the priesthoods in the church so are relegated to women's relief society. Half of my family is mormon. It's crushing what it does to women.

It's true that Mormons use more antidepressants that other people.

http://articles.latimes.com/2002/feb/20/news/mn-28924

www.sltrib.com/sltrib/home/50291053-76/utah-women-depression-antidepressants.html.csp

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, it's so nice and friendly to turn your gay child out onto the streets.

Along with anyone else who just can't get with the program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:my mormon coworker is very "nice" but he is passive aggressive as hell and engages in little power plays all the time. Which he covers up by being very "nice." ugh.

Superficial and smug are two words that come to mind. I work with someone who's not a team player. He'll go overboard for his church and family but he won't collaborate with us. At this point, I've "shunned" him, as I've learned how to get around him in order to get my own work done/

Interesting! This is my experience as well. I've worked with many mormons who seem superficially nice, but are withdrawn from most folks the the office. Over time, it becomes clear that they look out for each other first and foremost - family, church and mormon colleagues.

Most of this thread reads like it has been written by someone with an agenda. I wonder if Jeff has looked at how many unique posters there are - or whether it's the same person waxing on about kind, sweet mormons again and again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have known a group of Mormon lawyers for almost a decade and not one has ever gossiped, shirked work, boasted, been caught in a lie, or lost their temper to my knowledge. I have been to their houses, met their wives, worked closely with them on miserable cases with long days, late nights, and awful colleagues. I have seen them each under extreme pressure and in unfair situations. Yet, they have been unfailingly kind, patient, calm, and good.

How is this possible?

There is literally no one else I have ever known who has kept up such exemplary behavior for even a week. Not even other religious people I know (who profess to have the "joy of the Lord" and other such nonsense, but are worse than most athiests and agnostics who profess no such moral standards).

I don't have a religious bone in my body, but I would love to learn how to maintain such exemplary behavior. I would also love to teach it to my kids.

+1

Mormons spend all of Sunday at church, fast all morning beforehand, tithe a bunch of their money to their church without fail, go on meaningful Missions as young adults, and a whole host of other things *in practice* to keep their faith. They are amazing, in terms of practicing, as you said, OP. I have known many Mormons, and lived with a couple in my younger days (as roommates), and it is not just an "act", or demonstrated when it is "convenient" to them. I really admire them, myself.

OTOH, I know Catholics (this is not bashing, as my husband is Catholic) - who go to church for an hour each Sunday and treat their neighbors, quite literally, like crap - attacking them at every turn. They infinitely *say* they are a "good person", and rarely show it, or show it only when it is convenient. Such hogwash. I avoid those people like the plague to society and mankind that they are.