Anyone grow up with a sibling that was the "favorite"?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I'm on the outside looking in here. My DH's cousin's wife clearly favors her first born. It is blatant and kind of sad.

I just wonder how his only sibling will grow up feeling.

I have no clue how "favoring" even works. I hear my grandparents "favored" my cousin, but I never experienced it first-hand.

In any case, this shouldn't really concern you. The last thing the mother needs is your input on her parenting skills. Even if you're right, and she's wrong. If you feel the younger child lacks in some ways, be an awesome aunt to that child!

Yes, because when a child is being neglected it shouldn't concern anyone.

Neglected? Too dramatic, don't you think?

Not PP, but not dramatic at all. A child's emotional needs are just as important as physical needs. Emotional neglect and abuse are incredibly damaging to a child.

OP, you have an opportunity to be such a positive force in your nephew's life! As someone who was the unfavored and emotionally abused child (physically as well, although a hand was never laid on my sibling), I so wish I could have had someone like you in my life. Please do not underestimate the difference you can make.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Yes, DH was and is still the favorite. He's very successful, and his brother is a complete loser. No job or car kind of loser. Maybe $100 to his name.

He's probably a "loser" ( ) because his parents turned him into a total headcase by comparing him constantly with his brother. He never got the opportunity to shine and develop his own personality. I'm sure he has zero self-esteem.

Pretty sure everyone understood that to be the case without your eye rolling and explanation.

I am sure the PP appreciates your clarification of her post though.

Actually the original poster seems to lack even a shred of compassion for the "complete loser" brother, so the explanation was very likely needed.

That was in no way stated or even implied. You might want to not project or make assumptions when dealing in emotionless text

Nice try, but the language you choose to describe a person absolutely has implied meaning. You could have said your DH has a brother who struggles greatly, or something neutral like that. You chose the phrase "total loser."

Completely agree. Are PPs favorite children and unable to accept the consequences on their siblings?