Just found out dws father pays all her bills

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't call the $500/mo an "allowance." Call it a "budget."

This is not a budget if it is only for her own needs...

Um, yes it is, fool. Family budgets typically include basic self-maintenance, which for a woman can be high. Toiletries, nails, hair, make up, clothes. $500 a month is NOT lavish. Whatsoever.

Op here: yes and this is why my wife asked for this amount before she stopped working. She wanted to make sure I understood her self maintenance budget. She says her dad wants to make sure she feels taken care of and hence the Nordstrom credit card. She's the only child and he likes to spoil her. He hasn't remarried since her mother passed away years ago. I'm not going to worry about it anymore. It's not causing me problems now. I will be sure to check her credit score frequently in case she falls behind on the bills.

You married her, not her dad. It is not her dad's responsibility to worry about this.

[Anonymous]

How do you think she can get by on a $500 per month allowance? $20k per year really isn't that much.

I'm a SAHM and I charge about $10k per month. DH foots the bill. I am sure that DH would be thrilled if I could live on giving me $500 per month and my dad paid my shopping charges.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you think she can get by on a $500 per month allowance? $20k per year really isn't that much.

I'm a SAHM and I charge about $10k per month. DH foots the bill. I am sure that DH would be thrilled if I could live on giving me $500 per month and my dad paid my shopping charges.

Just wanted to add that 10k includes food, gas and travel as well as retail shopping.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you think she can get by on a $500 per month allowance? $20k per year really isn't that much.

I'm a SAHM and I charge about $10k per month. DH foots the bill. I am sure that DH would be thrilled if I could live on giving me $500 per month and my dad paid my shopping charges.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you think she can get by on a $500 per month allowance? $20k per year really isn't that much.

I'm a SAHM and I charge about $10k per month. DH foots the bill. I am sure that DH would be thrilled if I could live on giving me $500 per month and my dad paid my shopping charges.

Do you mean $10k per year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't call the $500/mo an "allowance." Call it a "budget."

This is not a budget if it is only for her own needs...

Um, yes it is, fool. Family budgets typically include basic self-maintenance, which for a woman can be high. Toiletries, nails, hair, make up, clothes. $500 a month is NOT lavish. Whatsoever.

Op here: yes and this is why my wife asked for this amount before she stopped working. She wanted to make sure I understood her self maintenance budget. She says her dad wants to make sure she feels taken care of and hence the Nordstrom credit card. She's the only child and he likes to spoil her. He hasn't remarried since her mother passed away years ago. I'm not going to worry about it anymore. It's not causing me problems now. I will be sure to check her credit score frequently in case she falls behind on the bills.

As the recipients of a $20,000 a year gift, you and your DW should be reporting this on your own taxes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't call the $500/mo an "allowance." Call it a "budget."

This is not a budget if it is only for her own needs...

Um, yes it is, fool. Family budgets typically include basic self-maintenance, which for a woman can be high. Toiletries, nails, hair, make up, clothes. $500 a month is NOT lavish. Whatsoever.

Op here: yes and this is why my wife asked for this amount before she stopped working. She wanted to make sure I understood her self maintenance budget. She says her dad wants to make sure she feels taken care of and hence the Nordstrom credit card. She's the only child and he likes to spoil her. He hasn't remarried since her mother passed away years ago. I'm not going to worry about it anymore. It's not causing me problems now. I will be sure to check her credit score frequently in case she falls behind on the bills.

Gahhh! Taxes, boo!!!

As the recipients of a $20,000 a year gift, you and your DW should be reporting this on your own taxes.

[Anonymous]

I can't get past the fact that she spends almost $2k a month of stuff and you've never noticed you aren't paying for it.

I wish I had this problem. Every $10 is tracked in our house.

[Anonymous]

And actually, the taxes poster has a point. If you are getting more than $14k a year in gift money (paying off debts is a gift) you are obligated to report that on your taxes.

[Anonymous]

Given how much $ seems to be floating around in your life - gifted house, well-off single dad who spoils his adult daughter, and your high-ish salary - I don't really see an issue with any of this. You're lucky, and should pay attention to not act entitled, but it's not terrible weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Given how much $ seems to be floating around in your life - gifted house, well-off single dad who spoils his adult daughter, and your high-ish salary - I don't really see an issue with any of this. You're lucky, and should pay attention to not act entitled, but it's not terrible weird.

+1

This is just one of the many ways the wealthy shield their assets from the Tax Man and pass them along to the next generation prior to death. Paying for everyday essentials, covering a grandchild's tuition bills, the co-signed credit cards, etc.

This is very common among the UMC and wealthy classes.

Yes, you should be worried that your wife has a spending problem. However, plan for it now and talk about what happens "when Dad dies." Lay out your expectations ahead of time so they don't come as a surprise to her.

[Anonymous]

Wow if my wife's dad paid for everything on her credit card.....I would use the credit card not bitch about it. Turn in your man card.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't get past the fact that she spends almost $2k a month of stuff and you've never noticed you aren't paying for it.

I wish I had this problem. Every $10 is tracked in our house.

Could be one pair of boots, a dress and a pair of jeans one month, a purse/tote the next. My husband wouldn't notice whether my bag cost $20 or $200 or $2000. I wish that was my spending budget.

[Anonymous]

Also, she may be using this "shopping money" to buy stuff for you and the kids. Does wife come home with ties, dress shirts, underwear and socks for you? New winter jackets for the kids?

If so, you should thank Dad.

Sounds like a pretty awesome setup!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you think she can get by on a $500 per month allowance? $20k per year really isn't that much.

I'm a SAHM and I charge about $10k per month. DH foots the bill. I am sure that DH would be thrilled if I could live on giving me $500 per month and my dad paid my shopping charges.

Do you mean $10k per year?

No, $10k per month. This month is more like 15k since the holidays.

I like nice bags and shoes. I also like to travel and stay at nice resorts.