Just found out dws father pays all her bills

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:With kids and a household to maintain, $2000 a month doesn't sound crazy. I could easily spend that if I had it. The issue is that she didn't tell you. I wouldn't take issue with her father helping you guys out.


We don't need help though. I make 200k / year and we have zero debt.


You don't have a mortgage?

Also, if she is keeping you from your friends, that is not healthy at all.


No. We inherited a house from family.


Your family or hers?
Anonymous
Why are you complaining?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Total troll story. If her dad was giving her 20k a year for clothing, I call BS she was a nanny. The wealthiest nanny on earth!

Another nanny here. I grew up among the elite, private schools and international travel every year. Perhaps you're confusing nannies like me, with your sitter. Huge difference.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:With kids and a household to maintain, $2000 a month doesn't sound crazy. I could easily spend that if I had it. The issue is that she didn't tell you. I wouldn't take issue with her father helping you guys out.


We don't need help though. I make 200k / year and we have zero debt.


You don't have a mortgage?

Also, if she is keeping you from your friends, that is not healthy at all.



Mine. I think she's worried something could happen to me in the future. Her grandmother was a sahm until her grandfather died very young. Her mother also died when she was young.


No. We inherited a house from family.


Your family or hers?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Total troll story. If her dad was giving her 20k a year for clothing, I call BS she was a nanny. The wealthiest nanny on earth!

This doesn't necessarily mean anything. Not all nannies are from poor backgrounds. Some people do jobs because they like working !

- nanny who makes 60k/ year



Princess Diana was a nanny when she was young. There's nothing wrong with it. My 20 year old cousin nannies and her parents are wealthy. She just happens to like kids.

I also don't think she was being secretive; she probably doesn't care to go into any details because they're immaterial and it's what she's always done.
Anonymous
Honest question: why in the world do women want to be a nanny? What's so appealing about it?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Honest question: why in the world do women want to be a nanny? What's so appealing about it?


Um, they like kids. It's fun and doesn't feel like a job.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Total troll story. If her dad was giving her 20k a year for clothing, I call BS she was a nanny. The wealthiest nanny on earth!

This doesn't necessarily mean anything. Not all nannies are from poor backgrounds. Some people do jobs because they like working !

- nanny who makes 60k/ year



Princess Diana was a nanny when she was young. There's nothing wrong with it. My 20 year old cousin nannies and her parents are wealthy. She just happens to like kids.

I also don't think she was being secretive; she probably doesn't care to go into any details because they're immaterial and it's what she's always done.


+ 1 I don't think this means she's being secretive. She told you right?

Anonymous
He pays for gifts. Big difference. Sounds like you pay the bills.
Anonymous
Soooooo much wrong with this post. You've never asked her to pay living expenses? Um, you are married. She is raising your kid, right? You give her an allowance of $500/mo? Um, she's not your child!

Yes, it's weird her dad is giving her 20k/yr for shopping, but your relationship dynamics sound way, way, way more bizarre. She is probably working harder at home duirng the day with your kid than you are at work (and this is coming from someone who works outside of the home herself so no bias here) -- it's not your place to dole out money. You a family. You are partners. Wake up. This is 2015.
Anonymous
Do you have life insurance op?
Anonymous
Most muslim women don’t spend any of their earnings on her household. Instead, their husband pays for everything because this is actually what the religion says.
Anonymous
Ok...here is what is wrong with this:
1) she his spending daddy's money while saving DH's. In a divorce, that means the saved money is community property. Not just hers. Daddy's inheritance would be just hers if not intermingled with family funds.

2) Who the heck puts there wife on an allowance? My wife (18 years) and I just have a joint account. We have our issues, and money is part of it, but I do not limit what she buys.

3) I am hoping this is a troll.
Anonymous
Primarily, what would bother me is that your DW appears to have little or no financial responsibility for herself. She gets an "allowance" (strange term) from you which is for what (?) and she apparently socks that away. She also spends freely and her father picks up the tab. She lives the financial life of a teenager or tween.

What are your goals as a couple, financially? Even a SAHM should know and factor into those goals. If her father wants to help her or your family, great, but there are much better ways to help than paying her Nordstrom bill. What about college accounts for your children? What about investments, CDs, etc.

Essentially, between you and her father, she is infantilized.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Ok...here is what is wrong with this:
1) She his spending daddy's money while saving DH's. In a divorce, that means the saved money is community property. Not just hers. Daddy's inheritance would be just hers if not intermingled with family funds.

2) Who the heck puts there wife on an allowance? My wife (18 years) and I just have a joint account. We have our issues, and money is part of it, but I do not limit what she buys.

3) I am hoping this is a troll.


I know couples that do this, however, they have their own account for "fun" money, but the other person knows how much goes into that account. They agree on what gets paid out of the joint account and have weekend discussions about money.

I was the one earlier in the thread that said this is all BS, and so far, the OP hasn't changed my mind.
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